Saiyonetta
by Sai Kunai Blade
Summary: Sai has met with the Umbran Witch Bayonetta and the two of them made a deal, working together to each other's mutual benefit. Now, it seems like the angels are becoming bolder and attacking more often, so our heroes must work together to find the cause and discover Bayonetta's lost past. Rated M because, come on, it's Bayonetta.
1. Demons Vs Angels, There's Witches, too!

**Background Music: "The Ninja Song" by SMPFilms (YouTube)**

Our story starts off with a chase scene as a man running for his life away from an unseen threat. He keeps running until a figure dressed in black lands in front of him, causing him to scream in fear. "Leave me alone!" He shouted, before running to his left through the woods, only to see the figure easily following him through the trees. The man continued to flee, dodging the occasional shuriken or kunai as he tried to change direction, forcing him to head in one particular direction as if his pursuer was leading him somewhere. Soon enough, they would reach a city, the figure chasing the man through the city's back alleys and through a sewage pipe until they reached the outskirts of the city. The man ran up to a hill where several more guys were waiting on motor cycles, the group now up to eight including him. "He's coming!" He shouted. Not even a minute later, the figure chasing the man leapt up onto the hill from below in a 3-point landing, looking up at them. said figure was dressed in traditional shinobi garb, with the exception that he wore a trench coat. With a mask on, all that could be seen of the ninja's face was his red eyes. The man said figure had previously been chasing laughed as he walked up in front of the group. "You fool! You thought I let you lead me around on purpose?! I lead YOU here to an AMBUSH! I could've taken you out on my own, but now my boys will get to have some of the pleasure of _**tearing you to shreds!"**_ He said as the group twisted and ripped apart their human forms, turning into demons, looking like 7 feet tall, 10 feet long black and red dragons standing on their hind legs. With a roar, they all rushed in at the figure.

The figure simply smirked, before reaching up and taking off his mask, revealing a 14 year old Sai Blade. "Man, I knew you were dumb, but actually think you could actually lure me into an ambush? That's just stupid. I knew you had this all set up. Now I can take you all out at once!" I said, rushing in and pulling out Ouroboros, slicing the leader's left leg, causing him to stumble. I then jumped onto and over the next one's head, leaping over the group and grabbing one of their motorcycles, spinning it around with the same skill Dante had with Lady's bike, before swinging it at a charging demon's face, wrecking the bike, but knocking down the demon and leaving his underside exposed, at which point I stabbed him in the stomach and ripped the blade upwards, slicing his upper body vertically in half. Another one came rushing in, but I pulled out and threw a manriki (a chain with weights at both ends, typically used like Kusari-gama in combat, but can be used...) to wrap its legs and tail, causing it to fall forward, at which point I rushed in, hitting it with hypersonic slashes, so that by the time it fell to its knees, its body was covered in deep, life-threatening gashes, before one final slice took its head off.

Another one rushed in, gnashing its teeth in preparation to chomp down on me, but this backfired as I tossed Ouroboros into the air, catching it backhand and the rattlesnake hilt shooting its venom down the demon's throat, melting it from the inside out. I decapitated it and kicked the severed head with enough force to stab its horns into another one's chest, killing it instantly. Two more rushed in, one about 3 feet behind the next one, leaving the perfect distance for my next attack. I tossed Ouroboros into the air again, slipping Kraken onto my hands and catching Ouroboros, holding it normally and launching the tentacles from Kraken's left gauntlet at the demon in the back, reeling myself in and slicing the first one in half, pulling the sword back before thrusting it forward and stabbing the demon in the chest, sending the poison through the blade, changing the monster from red and black to green and black as its body started to immediately die and rot, causing it to fall dead on its back.

The last two looked at each other in fear, before the leader who's leg I slashed roared, flicking his head at me as a gesture to attack me. The follower hesitated for a moment before rushing in, turning and spinning in an attempt to hit me with its tail. Big mistake. I lashed out Kraken's tentacles again and used the teeth to saw through and slice off the tail. The monster roared in pain, at which point I shoved its own tail down its throat, choking it and killing it. It was down to only me and the leader now. _**"Th-this can't be! It was the perfect ambush! We had everything planned out! You should be dead!"**_ The leader snapped.

"Yeah, it was almost perfect, except for one tiny detail: your target. You seemed to have forgotten, my friend..." I said, pulling out a Big Gulp and taking a swig, before putting it back and smirking. "I'm Sai Kunai Blade." I told him.

He growled at this, before letting out an enraged roar. _**"YOU BASTAAAARD!"**_ He bellowed as he rushed towards me, teeth gnashing like the third one as he awkwardly scuffled like a wounded alligator towards me. He reached me and pushed himself up to chomp down on my head, but with a quick flourish of Ouroboros that Vergil taught me, I sliced off his arms, legs and tail, causing him to fall on his back, still alive, but completely defenseless as I readied my blade for one last slice. _**"No... Please... Sai!"**_ He pleaded.

"Onara." I said, swinging the sword and slicing his head off.

 **End Music**

"You get it? Like Sayonara, saying goodbye? It's funny." I said to the 4th wall, before looking up as a blinding light came down from the sky. "What the hell!? Damn, that's bright!" I said, putting on a pair of sunglasses. When the light faded, I removed the glasses to see strange white and gold humanoid bird creatures flying down towards me with strange staff-like weapons. "Well, this is new. I've seen FALLEN angels before, but this is the first time I've encountered the real deal." I said. They then flew in at me and swung their weapons, which I dodged like a badass, Matrixing under the first one, jumping and rolling through the next two and sliding under the last one. "But obviously, you're not friendly." I said, trying to slice at them, only for my weapon to go straight through them. "What?!" I said, jumping back to avoid another slash from the closest one. "Okay, then! Try this!" I said, having Ouroboros spray acid at them, but it still passed through them with no effect. I changed the weapon into a bow and launched explosive arrows at them, but this still did nothing. "Dammit! Why won't it work!?" I demanded, before remembering something.

Flashback...

I was a kid, maybe 5 or 6, sitting on my father's lap as we looked through a book about angels, which was what he was teaching me how to fight and deal with next. "Angels live in a different plane of existence than us. We are demons with the power to see between these different planes, but we cannot interfere with this other plane and therefore we can't fight the angels conventionally." He explained.

"Then how, Dad?" I asked.

"Of course, there are things that exist on both planes. The elements, like the earth, lightning, ice..." He explained, before looking away from the book and to me. "And of course, fire..." He finished.

Back to now...

"Okay, then! Time to turn up the heat!" I said, levitating off the ground a bit and making a fireball in each hand, before flinging them at the angels, who stood in pairs a small distance away from each other, so each fireball and the resulting explosion easily picked off two angels apiece. "Divine or Infernal, mess with me, you're either going right back where you came from or going to hell." I said with a smirk, before looking over my shoulder. "And you can come out now. I can smell that perfume of yours all the way over here." I said, turning around as a strange woman walked out of the woods. She was pretty tall, almost 6 feet and had somewhat of a beehive of hair that also fell down to her waist, wrapped in two long red ribbons that reached far beyond her waist. She was dressed in a strange black skintight suit that has a rose design on the abdomen with long white gloves, black and gray heels, thin gold chains, three small belts strapped on each arm, and a pair of gold, cat-shaped earrings and glasses that have the design of butterfly wings close to the lenses. The chest of her suit was open, which would've revealed a decent amount of cleavage, if it weren't for some black plate or something with some kind of gold watch on it, housing a small red gem. But the strangest thing of all would be that she wore heels... with BIG GUNS ON THE BACK! And she was carrying another pair of large pinkish-red pistols similar to the ones on her feet as she walked up. (These guns are Elfen Knight, Bayonetta's weaker movie version of Scarborough Fair before she actually gets the game guns near the end of the movie)

"Quite impressive, little one. Not only where you able to defeat a group of mid-level demons, but also a few angels AND you even managed to sniff me out of hiding." She said, stopping when she was maybe 10 feet away, but it was close enough to tell that standing right up to each other, she easily dwarfed me in size (Sai's current height: 5'4").

I smirked at this. "The nose knows..." I said, tapping my nose, before glaring at her a bit. "And my name's Sai, not little one!" I said annoyed. I saved the UNIVERSE once and the Earth at least 5 times! I think I deserve a little respect. "I've killed A LOT of demons, aliens and a god to get to where I am today, I don't deserve to be called kiddy pet names!" I said defiantly.

"My, aren't we cheeky. Well, a few angels is one thing, but I'm not quite sure you're ready to handle a girl like me." She said, readying her pistols.

"Maybe you didn't hear the 'killed a god' part." I said, taking my fighting stance, starting off with Kraken and Gharial.

 **Background Music: "This is Gonna Hurt" by Sixx AM**

She fired her guns at me, but I used Kraken's tentacles to deflect the bullets, moving at speeds fast enough to knock each individual bullet off its original course so none hit me. I then lashed them at her, but she jumped out of the way at the last second, preparing to fire again. However, I used the tentacles to launch myself forward, slamming my right fist into the gun in her right hand, shattering it. She jumped back and looked at the handle in her hand, all that remained of the gun she once held. "Knightly, indeed, Rodin." She scoffed, tossing it aside and holding out the other one, but I stomped the ground with Gharial, shooting up a spike of earth, destroying that gun as well, two more spikes jutting out in an attempt to impale her, but she managed to jump back and avoid them again.

"Now you're mine!" I said, drawing a pair of Uzis (SMG) and preparing to fire. But suddenly, she was right in front of me in an instant, snatching the guns out of my hands. "What the?!" I said in disbelief.

"Why thank you, deary. Such a gentleman to replace what you broke. Here's your reward!" She said, bringing her right leg up and slamming it into my chest, the gun on the heel firing a dozen bullets into my chest, before jumping off her left foot, spinning and smashing said foot into my face, sending my flying. Suddenly, I felt something pierce into the back of my neck and head. I felt a number of sharp pokes all down my back, too, but whatever punctured my head couldn't puncture my coat. I looked around as much as I could to see I was in an iron maiden, which slammed shut on me. "Well, he had his tricks, but he certainly wasn't on my level. It must have been one pitiful god to have lost to him." Bayonetta said, before looking at the Uzis she took from me. "I suppose they're better than nothing until I can get Rodin to make me a DECENT set of guns." She said, before looking up as she saw cracks forming in the iron maiden she threw me in. "What?!" She demanded.

"Sorry, lady, but I've been chewed on by demons that make that thing look like a tanning booth." I said.

She chuckled at this. "Impressive, little one. But I think it's time we put a STOP to this." She said, activating Witch Time again and supposedly freezing me along with time. But while the trick caught me off-guard the first time, it's nothing I haven't dealt with before. She got cocky now, believing I was an easy target as she sauntered up to me.

(Now!) I thought, using Mirror Move and replicating Witch Time, releasing me and putting us back on equal ground. "Yes!" I said, rushing in at her.

"It can't be!" She said in shock, dodging my attack, attempting to kick me, but I ducked under it, pulling out Ouroboros and swinging at her foot, breaking the 3rd gun of her original pair, forcing her to jump away before her foot was sliced off along with the gun. "How did you counter my witch time?! I'd never expect a child like you to know that!" She said.

"I call it Mirror Move. I can counter any technique used against me. I've actually had to counter something like this before." I said, leaving out its crucial flaw of a five minute recharge. "I haven't used it in a while. Glad it still works." I said.

"Not bad, little one. But now I'd like you to meet a friend of mine." She said, before suddenly dancing in place. "AVAVAGO!" She announced. Suddenly, her clothes began to pull away and all of it came back to the end of her hair, meaning her clothes were really her hair! And that's not all, it suddenly went down a strange black and red portal in the ground.

"Whoa..." I said in shock because of a few things. A: HER CLOTHES WERE HER HAIR! B: She was now naked! And C: her hair just went into some weird portal. Suddenly, I heard a strange growling noise behind me. "I don't like the sound of that..." I said nervously, turning around to see the head and neck of a massive dragon emerging from a portal in the ground behind me. The creature let out a roar that sounded like an elephant's angry trumpeting, before lunging at me. "Oh, not again!" I said, before the monster snapped its jaws down on me. However, after a few moments, I managed to pry the jaws open. "I must taste good, because this happens WAY too often!" I said, before suddenly pushing as hard as I could with my arms and legs to force the jaws wide open and give me enough time to escape. "Then I guess I can call in back-up, too!" I said, pulling out Minotaur and allowing the axe to change into the spirit form of the hybrid demon, who laid into the massive dragon with devastating punches and headbutts, as well as fierce slashes from his horns, before I blasted it in the top of the head with a fireball to stun it and finishing it off with a diving stab from Ouroboros. It roared in pain before collapsing to its side, dead, the hair going back through the portal and redressing the woman.

"My, my, you are quite impressive, little one." She said, looking the last gun in her original set, before looking back to me. "Tell you what: break this last gun on my foot, we'll call it quits and you win. Fail to do so and you're in for a spanking." She said with a smirk.

"Uh..." I said, somewhat disturbed by the last part of the comment.

In Sai's mind...

"Bad touch! Bad touch! Stranger danger!" I said in a panic as I tried to scramble as far away as I could from my position on the couch. (Jontron reference!)

Reality...

I shook off the initial fear, putting on a determined face. "Bring it!" I said.

She smirked. "Very well!" She said, rushing in and attacking, but several times during her combo, I had to dodge out of the way of massive fists and feet coming out of portals around us, throwing punches and kicks at me. Eventually she jumped and tried to crash down on my head with an axe kick, but I swung my trusty axe upward, slamming into the last gun on her heel, shattering it and knocking her back.

 **End Music**

She stood back up and looked at me as if she was still angry and would attack again, but she suddenly brightened up. "Well done, little one." She said, walking up to me.

"Thanks. But that's still not my name." I said.

"Fair enough. Perhaps I could make it up to you with a bit of information. You'd like to know why those angels attacked you, I assume?" She asked.

I had forgotten about the angels for a moment, but now that she mentioned it, it did seem like the angels were after me. "I wouldn't mind figuring out why, no." I confirmed.

"Very well, then come along with me... Sai." She said, gesturing for me to follow. "That's more like it." I said, following her.

We headed back to the city, where she introduced herself as Bayonetta before we arrived at a placed called the Gates of Hell, which was obviously a bar. "Uh, you know I'm too young to go in there, right?" I asked.

"I think you'll find it rather easy when you're with me." She explained the two of us walking in.

Towards the back of the room was the actual bar where a tall, muscular, bald black man in sunglasses with several tattoos and rings was bartending. And in the middle of the room to the left of the entrance, a short fat man was playing pool, apparently by himself, cursing and repeating "mulligan" as he tried to sink the 8 ball. Bayonetta walked up to the bar as I took a few steps in, looking around. "Hey, kid! You ain't old enough to do business at this fine establishment." The black guy said.

"He's with me, Rodin." Bayonetta said.

The short man laughed at this. "Would you look at this, Rodin?! Looks like Bayonetta's picking up work as a babysitter! Guess bein' a nun ain't paying the bills!" Enzo laughed, finally sinking the 8 ball. "Ey! Rodin, I did it!" The man cheered for himself.

Rodin merely scoffed at this. "A half hour to finish a game of pool by yourself. New record. Not bad, Enzo." He said, holding his hand out. Suddenly, all the balls came out of the pockets and were reset for the next player.

"A half hour? Playing on your own?" I asked with a smirk. Any time my family played a game of pool with each other, regardless of who was playing, it never took more than 15 minutes.

"What, you think you can do better?!" Enzo demanded.

"Yeah, let me give it a try." I said, grabbing the stick from him, chalking it and facing away from the table.

"Hey, kid, maybe you're new at this, but you're supposed to be FACING the table!" Enzo said with a laughing, Rodin even chuckling a bit while Bayonetta watched with a raised eyebrow, curious of what I was planning.

"Ever heard of a trickshot?" I asked, crossing my right leg over my left one and turning my body enough to get my hand on the table, my upper body turned enough so it was almost facing forward like normal, readying the cue hitting the ball, connecting with the others and managing to sink them all. "That's a new one I came up with last time I played. I call it the twist shot. I also got the reverse shot, but its not as flashy, I just stand facing away from the table with the stick in my left hand, drive it back into the cue ball and sink all the others." I explained.

Enzo looked in disbelief, whether or not it was because a kid just perfectly sank every ball on the first turn or because I was twisted halfway around and Rodin was decently impressed as well. "Not bad, kid. Not bad." He said.

"He's the one who did this as well." Bayonetta said, laying down the remains of Elfen Knight. "I'm afraid it's not your best craftsmanship if a child can break it." She said.

"This child is also a demon, you know?" I said in slight annoyance. "But sorry to say, she's right. Those guns weren't quite top quality. My brother could make something better." I said.

He growled a bit at this. "Is that so?" He asked.

"Yep. He has this badass metal it takes hellfire to melt and a trillion tons to break. Try it out." I said, tossing him a Bladenium Bowie Knife Lance made.

He inspected it closely, before hacking down on the remains of Elfen Knight with it, surprise showing up on his face as it indeed cut through the guns with ease. "Not bad. So, how'd you two meet up and break my babies?" He asked.

"I was on my last mission for your Infernal friends when I saw the boy take out a group of mid-level demons on his own. Quite flashy, too, I might add. Then a group of angels appeared and he managed to dispatch them as well. I decided to test him out and, as you can see, he did quite well. He survived one of my iron maidens, stopped Gomorrah from chowing down on him and even countered my Witch Time." She explained.

"Really?" He asked.

"It only works one every 5 minutes, though. I left that part out." I explained.

"And I'm thinking we could reach an agreement: I teach you how to slow time on your own and use guns on your feet as well as your hands and perhaps you can help me out of a little contract of mine." She said.

"Contract? My sisters are the lawyers, maybe I could give you their cards..." I said, searching for one of either Katana or Spirai's business cards.

"Sadly, lawyers wouldn't do me much good. Hell, I'm convinced a few of the bastards holding me to the contract are lawyers who are burning in Inferno." Bayonetta explained.

"A few of my friends on the other side her have in a deal. It's simple, but no less a pain in the ass: she kills a handful of angels every day, she gets to stay up here. Fail, and they drag her down to hell." Rodin explained.

"So, the way I see it, I take out the demons holding her to the contract, she's free to go?" I asked.

"Bingo." Rodin said.

"When do I start then?" I asked.

"How about you show me what you got first. Those babies were nice, but they're not the only thing I got in store." Rodin said, moving back towards the bar shelf with all the booze, which suddenly pulled back into the wall to the side, being replaced by a room full of weapons. He then snapped his fingers and 3 familiar forms appeared in the middle of the room behind us: 3 Hell Prides; weak, but numerous scythe wielding demons appeared and let out their zombie like groans as they scuffled towards us. "Pick your weapon and let's see you deal with them." He said.

"Oh, Jesus!" Enzo screamed, dropping his pool cue and running over to us, diving behind the bar and holding onto Rodin for dear life. The pool cue rolled to a stop in front of my seat.

"Got it." I said, getting off my seat and picking up the fallen stick, holding and spinning it like a staff, gesturing for the demons to attack. The first one let out a furious groan and swung its scythe down at me, but I used the cue to stop the shaft of the scythe, stopping the blade inches from my face, at which point I turned the improvised staff to the left, smacking the demon in the side of the head, causing it to do a 180 spin and, while it was stunned, I lined a shot up just like in pool and shot the stick forward, through the back of the demon's head, coming out of its mouth, killing it and reducing it to sand. I then held the cue backhand in my right hand, smashing the thicker, heavier bottom end of the cue into the next one's head, easily killing it as well, before tossing and catching the cue like a javelin, throwing it into the final demon's face. "They missed their cue. I didn't." I said, before looking at the 4th wall. "You try coming up with one-liners for pool!" I said.

Rodin nodded his head, sufficiently impressed. "Not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your daddy knew what he was doing when he taught you to fight." He said.

"Yeah, my dad, totally! Not my mom or my sisters at all! Yep, dear old dad! If Ryu Blade can teach you one thing, it's to kill something." I said.

He was shocked at hearing my dad's name. "Ryu Blade?!" He asked in disbelief, before looking at Bayonetta. "He's one bad mothafucka. Madama Butterfly even used to be his bitch. Even had her on a collar and chain." He explained.

"Really?" Bayonetta said, now even shocked herself to think that her personally contracted demon, said to be more vicious and brutal than any other, could still be dominated and how powerful said dominator would have to be.

"Ohh, that must be the giant demon chick in those pictures Dad has." I said.

Rodin chuckled at this, looking once more at Bayonetta. "With this kid around, you might just have a 'get out of Inferno free' card." He said.

"It'll be nice to take a day off every so often. I've always wanted to try an all day shopping spree." She agreed.

And so two years passed and in those two years, I all but mastered both the bullet arts (Bayonetta's fighting style, using 4 guns) and using Witch Time, but I prefer to call it Bullet Time when I'm using it. And, thanks to being the champion and grandson of the goddess of Hell, I made a contract with her, even enabling me to use Wicked Weaves and summons like Bayonetta, except I don't lose my clothes. I've eliminated a few of the demons holding Bayonetta to her contract in that time, but not all of them, so we she still had to fight angels on a daily basis, while I often provided assistance.

The scene changes now to a cemetery where we first see Enzo pissing on a grave. "Show some respect for the dead, will ya, you sick bastard." I snapped at him.

"Ah, calm down, kid! Today's a good day! Ol' Humpty Dumpty's taken his last fall! Even old Eggman the Destroyer's gonna get scrambled in the end!" He laughed.

"First off, good luck finding a bar that will let you go as long as Rodin did before they stop serving you for not paying your tabs, second: if anything, Eggman's doing better than ever, you haven't seen Forces?" I asked.

He simply rolled his eyes at this. "You know, I still don't get why you guys drag me out here for these things. I just drop off the merchandise!" He said, before looking at Bayonetta. "Ey! Bet you can't guess what today is!" He said.

"Your birthday, you've been bugging us about it for weeks. Happy birthday." I said annoyed, tossing him a bottle of cologne. "There, now I don't have to smell you 3 minutes before I see you." I said.

Bayonetta said nothing, merely reciting what she read in the bible while she dressed as a nun. "Reading the Good Lord's book ain't gonna do much! People have been waiting for this asshole to get whacked for ages!" He said, spitting on the casket.

"I thought about it the last time one of his weapons broke on me, but he stepped up his game since then." I said.

"Yeah, but you gotta keep the outfit happy. If we don't take care of him, they take care of us. And I prefer my shoes be made out of rubber, not concrete." Enzo went on.

"I'm more partial to leather, personally." I said.

"But it's that kind of town. Without good-hearted souls like us to put these bastards six feet under, where'd society be?" He asked.

"Not much different, they'd probably just go pack to tossing the dead bodies in a pile and burning them." I said with a shrug.

"Of course the pay's not bad, either." He said.

"You're talking to a guy who's worth more than the country, an undertaker's salary means nothing to me." I said.

He then turned back to Bayonetta, who was still praying. "Jesus, you really get into this shit, don't ya? If it were me, I'd be praying he ends up barbecued! Or at least sunny side up!" He laughed.

"You sound like you're expecting a giant turn-out for your funeral. THAT ain't gonna happen." I told him.

He apparently ignored this, still laughing as he looked at Bayonetta. "You can keep praying, but the only way this guy's meeting the Lord is if God's hungry for breakfast!" He laughed on. I merely rolled my eyes at this, deciding not to answer. "Speaking of hungry, are we done here? My kids are baking me a birthday cake tonight. Cute little fuckers, I'll tell ya what!" He said.

"Oh, so they take after their mother." I said. (Insert MLG)

"Eh, frickin' wise guy." He grumbled, before looking at the coffin, taking a final drag off his cigar. "Well then, adios." He said, flicking the cigar down on the coffin. He started to walk away, before a blinding yellow light descended from the heavens. "What the fuck!? They're here?! For this douchebag?!" He said in disbelief dropping to his knees. "I hate this damn light! I can't see a thing!" He said, trying to shield his eyes from the light, knocking over a tombstone in the process.

"Jeez, dude, every other word out of your mouth doesn't have to be a swear." I said.

"But they're there, ain't they!? You hearin' me?! You can see them, can't you?!" He asked.

"Yes, we can." I confirmed.

"Yes, we see them. They are the instruments of God, descending on his heavenly rays down to Earth." Bayonetta explained.

"Oh... My... God!" He said in fear.

With that, Bayonetta dropped her Bible and the two of us created and jumped through portals into Purgatorio, flying up towards the angels...

 **Background Music: "Hell" by Disturbed**

...Before beating the ever-living shit out of them, pulverizing them as soon as they came into our reach. I flew at blinding speeds, slamming my body into a large group of demons, smashing through one after the other in an Unrelenting Barrage while Bayonetta grabbed two by the throat while slamming down on one's chest, sending them all plummeting towards the ground, before Bayonetta threw the ones in her hands, smashing them into the ground, before slamming into it herself with the angel underfoot cushioning her fall. We finished with the first wave, only for another one to come right after. "You look tired. Let me tuck you in." She said, rushing at them.

"Bedtime, suckers!" I said, rushing in along with her. We continued to beat them down, sending them flying and smashing into all kinds of graves, tombstones and a couple mausoleums, while Enzo struggled to understand what was going on, running back and forth to avoid the invisible slaughter going on around him. Bayonetta held one angel by the legs and spun him around, smashing him headfirst into several other angels, killing them all while I kicked one into the air, teleported into the air behind it, grabbing it and spinning, executing the Izuna Drop and shattering its head upon impact.

Meanwhile, more tombstones began falling over, revealing Enzo trying to hide in a small circle of them. Wait, so all these graves are in big circles, who designed this cemetery?! "Oh, shit, come on, it's my friggin' birthday!" He shouted in panic, continuing his struggle to find cover wherever he could, a tombstone at the end of a row Bayonetta knocked an angel into almost smashing down on his legs, forcing him to split them open to avoid getting them crushed. "Mother of Mary!" He screamed, crawling out of the way of a few more angelic beatdowns, stopping and praying in front of a tombstone large enough to hide behind. "I didn't mean all that humpty dumpty shit! I swear!" He pleaded. The angels landed on and closed in on the casket, which suddenly burst open, Rodin standing in it, radiating demonic energy and pure anger and hate. his glowing red eyes visible even under his sunglasses... Why did we put him in the casket with sunglasses?

He stepped out of the coffin in front of 3 terrified angels. "Next time you lay hands on me, you better make sure I'm dead." He warned them as he stepped up to them, not even fazed as the top of the casket crashed down on his head. "Now move out the way..." He ordered them, but they were still frozen in fear. "GO!" He roared his order. sending out a wave of demonic energy that staggered the angels back... directly into the path of my Evil Explosion. (I don't know if I said it in Sainoverse, but that's easily one of my top 5 favorite Super attacks in the game)

"Ro-Ro-Rodin?!" Enzo said in fear.

"Well, if it ain't my good buddy Enzo." The fallen angel said, pulling up a cigarette and lighting it with purple flames from his thumb, before pointing it at Enzo. "You die and I'm gonna have to crawl back in that hole chasing after all the money you owe me." He said.

"Let's go for a ride!" I said, using Blue Hurricane to gather up several angels and lots of debris to smash all of them with.

An angel tried to run away from Bayonetta, but she grabbed it and forced it to bend over, making it stumble and fall forward into another angel, making somewhat of a conga line of bent over angels all the way to the one in front, who held onto a tombstone to prevent from falling. "Do you naughty little angels deserve a goods spanking?" She asked, before lifting it up, dragging all the other angels and the tombstone along with it, before bending over backwards in a piledriver, smashing all the angels' heads under each other, except the last one, whose head was crushed under a stone pillar.

Rodin took a drag off his cigarette as he observed the angelic slaughter. "Beautiful." He said, blowing out the smoke. Bayonetta rushed and jumped towards another group of demons, fighting them in mid-air as they managed to nearly cut her, but still missed each time, only cutting her clothes at the arm, up her leg, across her ass and boobs, making the clothes essentially useless, so she tore them off and threw them aside, using her hair to cover herself and make her signature outfit. "Bayonetta!" Rodin called, reaching into his casket and tossing her a number of pistols, readying some more and turning to me. "Sai!" He called.

"Brought my own! Save them for her!" I called to him, pulling out a quartet of Five-sevens, catching one in each hand and equipping one to each foot, becoming a whirlwind of gunfire as I did fancy mid-air spins and flips to send the bullets flying at every angel unfortunate enough to have come into my line of sight and angle of fire.

We tore through angel after angel, completely clearing it out, until a decently larger angel came from nowhere an snatched Enzo from his hiding place, starting to fly away with him. "Hey! You can't take me like this! It's against regulations, I tell ya!" He screamed as the angel flew towards a cliff, smashing him through the fence stopping people from getting on said cliff and going down with him over the cliff.

"We told him to get out of here." I said with a shrug.

"I'd like to leave him to the beasts, but sadly, he has information we need." Bayonetta said, running to the broken gate, jumping and sprouting butterfly wings to fly up a little higher and get herself over the edge.

"I guess it IS my job to protect humans." I said, jumping and sprouting my raven wings for the same effect, the two of us then free falling and slamming down... right on Enzo's car.

He screamed at this. "Dammit, who did that!? I just bought the damn thing." He snapped, before being dropped on his face.

"I'm sure you can buy a new one with all the money in your swear jar." I said.

Bayonetta looked down at the demons now. "Haven't you figured it out yet? There's no quarter for you in this world." She told them, rushing in and attacking.

"I got the big guy." I said, rushing in at him. I rushed at him and easily dodged a number of attacks, even flipping behind the angel and kicking it in the back of the head, unloading two bullets at the same time. It screeched in fury and swung back at me, but I simply smirked at this. "Time out!" I said, activating Bullet Time, landing several punches and kicks to the large angel, before looking up and noticing a small swarm had attempted to dive-bomb me. "Oh, this will be good." I said, moving the big angel to where I had been standing and casually walking away with my hands behind my back, before snapping my fingers and causing the angels to mess up, crashing down into a massive pile, leaving them stunned and wide open for a Hellzone Grenade, finishing them off just as Bayonetta finished hers.

 **End Music**

She then sighed as she looked at the guns she was forced to use. "Rodin should be paying me for even touching these toys." She complained.

"They certainly aren't doing much more than our fists. They'd be useless against anything bigger than those angels." I agreed.

"Do you two have any idea how much this is gonna cost to fix?!" He demanded.

"Nothing." I answered, channeling my demonic energy. "Mekanikku!" I announced in Japanese (mechanic), a small portal appearing in the ground, where a red and black Gremlin with a tool belt popped out of, looking around. First it saw Bayonetta and began drooling with hearts in its eyes and its tongue hanging out, trying to leap at her, but I grabbed it by the head and turned it towards the car. "Not her, you little pervert, the car." I said.

It saw the car and immediately stars came to its eyes. "Hahahaha! Fix! FIX! **FIX!"** It screeched, charging the car as Enzo backed a way. Picture that thing in the cartoons where you see a character split into like 6 of themself, each doing one thing at a time, that's what the Gremlin was doing. In a matter of minutes, Enzo's destroyed... I don't know, they never say what kind of car it was, became a brand new 4-seated convertible Lamborghini. "Haha! Fixed!" It announced, before diving back through the portal it came from.

"And that is how you save money on car repairs." I explained.

Enzo was ecstatic at this. "Oh, my god! It's like getting a whole new car for free! You're the greatest, kid!" He said in happiness and disbelief, inspecting his new ride.

"I know I am. That's why I had it fixed, I can't ride in a broken down wreck." I said, hopping in the back and laying down.

"Well, now that the boys are done their little car chat: Enzo, let's have a quick chat about this thing you've been looking into for me." She said.

He instantly deflated after this. "Oh, come on! This is why I was going home! I get held up in the air by some invisible things and you want an intelligence briefing!? It never stops with you!" He complained.

"You know, those Gremlins are great at two things: mechanic stuff and murder stuff. So if you're gonna complain after I had your car fixed and turned into a completely better car, I could call him back for the other thing." I said with an evil grin, sprouting my demon horns.

He screamed at this, dropping to his knees. "Okay, I'll do it! Just don't call him back! Please!" He pleaded.

"I can't sense Rodin anymore. He must've headed back to his bar. We may as well, too. He said he had something for us before we did this funeral scam, right?" I asked.

"Indeed. I'm quite curious myself. Very well, Enzo, we can wait until we're at the Gates of Hell, but then I want to hear everything you know!" She said with a warning glare.

"Y-you got it!" He said in fear, the two of them getting in the car. We headed back to the city on our way to the Gates of Hell, when Enzo began grumbling to himself. "Those bastards got some nerve grabbing on me! If I could see those things that held me up back there, fuggetaboutit!" He complained, looking at Bayonetta.

"Enzo, the road. Pay attention, dear." She said, adjusting his head back to the road.

"Yeah, man, I just had this thing fixed, don't wreck it again." I said.

"How can you be so calm?! You're still getting screwed in all of this, too! Of all the lowlife scum in too deep in this town, I've never seen one get wrapped up in a fight with God's messengers!" He said, before screaming and moving us out of the way of a gas tanker. "Dressed like a nun, too! When you get to the afterlife, that's not going to be pretty!" He told her.

"I can't help it if I like the little outfits." She said.

"Too much white for me. Stains too easy. And I don't have any demons that take care of dry cleaning." I said.

"The toys are nice, too." She said, to which we all chuckled.

"Now that, we agree on." I said.

"20 years ago, you woke up stuck in a casket at the bottom of a lake. All you can remember is that your a witch. And now you're stuck. Because you've gotta sacrifice our halo-wearing friends every day, or they'll drag your ass back down to Hell. I know I thought I got screwed, but having to slap around the divine for a living? Now that's really getting screwed!" He said.

"If I needed a biographer, you wouldn't be my first choice." She said, looking at him, then back to me. "As for having to kill the angels or be dragged down, someone is SUPPOSED to be working on that for me." She said with a small, half playful, half serious glare.

"Hey, there are a lot of demons out there! It's like picking a needle out of a haystack! And with the risks that come with it, it's more like a hay in a needle stack." I defended myself.

She rolled her eyes, looking back at Enzo. "And also, I set up the funeral, you see to the arrangements, that was our deal!" She said.

"Hey, don't worry! The info I got is good. It's gonna get you closer to the other stone in your missing set and figuring out some of that lost past of yours. I swear." He said, before laughing. "After jewels instead of cash! Just like a girl!" He laughed.

"Dammit, Enzo! Stop being sexist! That's a big issue lately." I said.

She then grabbed him by the collar. "Hey, come on! Can't you take a joke?!" He demanded.

"Ezo, someone has left you a present! Too bad, I can't stand bugs." She said, tossing off a transmission device.

"Probably that punk reporter again." I said, rolling my eyes and looking back as a car quickly got off at the next exit.

Suddenly, we all heard something behind us, Bayonetta and I looking back again while Enzo looked in the rear view mirror, shocked and horrified to see a plane coming at us. "What the fuck!?" He demanded. He lost control and drove into the divider in the road, launching us into the air.

"It's time to stop!" I shouted, activating Bullet Time, Bayonetta and I entering Purgatorio before jumping onto the plane. Angels started to come at us, before the side of the plane was suddenly shot out and a large circle of metal was blasted out, spinning towards us at high speeds. We landed on it and stood, our weight counterbalancing the other side, which clearly had two people of similar size to us on it, before we jumped off.

The piece then crashed onto the wing, angels flying around behind it where the other two would be, before evidently getting their asses handed to them behind it. It began to roll out of the way and reveal the figures, but one suddenly jumped into the air and slaughtered another small group while the other one moved like a blur, attacking a couple angels behind us, before the other figure landed beside him. She was a tall, slender, youthful looking woman with porcelain skin and a short, platinum silver hair, similar to pixie cut, wearing a body suit made by the clothing line "d'arc." It was red with a button design starting from the left side of her chest down to her right heel. The buttons opened up, revealing a white layer underneath on the front of her right leg and on the back of her left leg. The suit had a rather large renaissance style collar that is worn similarly to a tie with her Umbran Watch resting right in the center of her bust. She had black furry cuffs on her arms, as well as wearing red open-toe heels, revealing perfectly manicured toes. Her glasses were red and feature a wing design followed by a few black feathers over her right ear. "You?!" Bayonetta asked.

"What's the matter, Bayonetta? All that sleeping made you soft?" The woman taunted, gesturing for Bayonetta to attack.

Meanwhile, the other figure was a boy around my age and height with pale skin and shoulder-length black hair that covered his right eyes, although I could tell from his left one they were blood red just like mine. He was dressed in all black: black cargo pants, black fingerless gloves, black shit, black socks, black combat boots and a black leather jacket. The only thing with any color was the black and red revolvers in his hands and attached to the back of his legs. He looked me over, before letting out a scoff. "So, you're supposed to be this big shot hero? I don't believe it." He said. I noticed while he was talking he had razor sharp teeth and fangs, so he was a demon or a vampire, possibly both.

I said nothing, observing both of these strangers' appearances and behaviors so far, I already knew pretty much everything I needed to know. "You're evil, aren't you?" I asked.

"They are so fucking onto us!" The guy snapped, before we all drew our guns and shot at angels charging at the person standing in front of us.

 **Background Music: "Riot" by Three Days Grace**

Bayonetta and the girl in red split off to the left side of the wing closer to the body of the plane, the dude and I moved to the right closer towards the end of the wing. Bayonetta grabbed the angel closest to her and raised an iron maiden up behind it, distracting it and allowing her to kick it right into the torture device, which slammed shut and burped after it had its fill. Just after this, the woman in red moved around behind another one and created a guillotine, repeatedly kicking its angelic ass as it tried to resist being decapitated, until she finally kicked its head through the hole, the blade coming down and removing the angel from existence.

Bayonetta did her next torture attack by wrapping a chain around the angels next and throwing it over a strange pulley that appeared in thin air, yanking the chain as hard as she could, crushing the angel's head between said pulley and whatever the pulley was magically hooked to. Meanwhile, the girl in red kicked an angel into the face, knocking it to the ground and summoning a hand from hell to grab each limb, before creating a massive tombstone above the angel, crushing it. Bayonetta pulverized the next unfortunate angel in front of her, before summoning a vice-like contraption with the angel between two large hands that began to close in on it, but Bayonetta gave the wheel controlling the hands a mighty spin, forcing them to rapidly close and smash the unfortunate angel between them. The girl pinned an angel to the ground and summoned a chainsaw from nowhere, slowly bringing it down towards the angel's chest, who tried to stop it, but it was futile and the chainsaw tore through its chest, bringing an end to its existence.

Meanwhile, the new guy and me were fighting back to back, shooting the angels, but he was having a much easier time, thanks to... "Nice guns." I told him.

"These babies have gotten me through Hell and back. They're called bloodshot. Any time I pull the trigger, there is GOING to be blood." He said.

"Nice. And is YOUR name half as cool as your guns?" I asked.

"Damion Castro. I'd say nice to meet you, but you might regret meeting me." He said.

"I just keep meeting new and interesting people." I said, kicking an angel to the ground, repeatedly stomping on it and releasing two bullets per stomp. Meanwhile, Damion snatched an angel out of the air, swinging it over his head from on side to the other, slamming it into the ground over and over, before opening his mouth and chomping down on the angels next, turning its pure white, healthy looking body to a shriveled up stone gray one, before grabbing its shoulders with its neck still in his mouth, ripping his head off. One more angel that easily stood twice as tall as the two of us let out a shriek, before swinging its sword down at us, but we looked at each other and nodded, Damion shooting the sword with both guns in his hand, the force knocking angel back and allowing me to throw a kick to its mid-section, taking its feet out from under it and making it drop its sword, falling to the ground face first. We grabbed the angel by the wings and looked at each other once again with a nod, dragging the creature over to the plane's blades, holding it out and causing the blades to decapitate it.

 **End Music**

The four of us fought together both stylishly and effectively, maneuvering around each other and attacking the angels, quickly wiping out the horde, before returning our attentions to the other party. "So... what now?" I asked, readying myself for an attack.

The woman simply scoffed at this. "The two of you aren't ready." She said.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" I asked, glaring at her.

"It means that for now... We're done here." Damion said, lowering his guns, a huge truck passing between us for a split second, but that was long enough for the two of them to disappear across the rooftops.

"Who are they? And how did they know us? More importantly, what did they want from us?" I wondered.

"We can find all that out later, dear. For now, I could use a drink. And all the blood must've rushed to Enzo's head by now." She said, to which I nodded, the two of us jumping through the portal back to the human world, grabbing the car, restarting time and throwing it down, followed by Enzo, who crashed down in the driver's seat. "That girl..." She said, appearing to have some sort of flashback.

"Like you said, we'll find out later." I said.

Later...

We got to the Gates of Hell, Bayonetta leaning onto the bar while I sat at it, Enzo already drunk at a table, leaning back in his chair. "Those assholes sure know how to get attention. Even perked the ears of some of the hotheads down home"." Rodin said, looking to a nearby passage to Inferno.

"You don't say?" Bayonetta asked.

"Demons are used to being the ones making the moves in the human world. Not every day angels fuck around with it." I said.

"It's getting harder and harder to tell the worlds apart. Human world, Inferno, Paradiso, who can tell the difference?" Rodin said.

"I know all the Hells are different from each other, but I've been to a few of them and I can tell the difference quite clearly. But it is starting to get crazy up here. ALMOST as crazy as down there." I said.

"Even harder with Purgatorio in the middle. Fight long enough in there and you'll really lose sight. Why the sudden interest in metaphysics?" She asked.

"It's a balance, right? Even if some of them like messing around with the humans, we've all got a stake in the status quo. But people keep fucking around like this, the Book of Revelations is gonna look like Mother Goose. Heaven and Hell are gonna go straight for each other's throats." Rodin explained, his eyes glowing red under the shades.

"Wonder where that puts me in all this. Last I checked, both sides hate me." I said.

"Heaven and Hell can tear each other apart for all I care. I've got my own problems to worry about." Bayonetta said.

"Something's up. Everything's a bit too brazen. And Enzo's tip makes the timing too perfect. This reeks of a set up. Someone in one of those lost memories calling you out." Rodin said, the bar opening to reveal the weapon room, Rodin heading into the back. After a minute, he came back with two silver platters with a sheet over each. "I've got a little present for ya. Built from an alloy the Devil himself would kill to get his hands on. Don't break these. They're one of a kind." He said, laying down the one in his right hand, pushing it in front of Bayonetta and revealing a new and improved version of Elfen Knight; big red and gold pistols with two barrels, Scarborough Fair written on the sides of them each gun containing a gem on either side of it above the grip, each gun with different color gems: light blue, white, pink and yellow. Bayonetta examined one of them closely, before picking them up and stylishly spun them around, before aiming them at Rodin, who stood ready with her favorite drink.

"Calling me out? I don't go in for strange offers. Then again, I'm getting a little tired of these weaklings they keep throwing at me. Maybe I should aim for something a bit more... High Class." She said, looking down the sights of the gun in her right hand.

"What about me? From the look of it, you have another surprise in your other hand." I said, looking at the platter he still held.

He narrowed his eyes at this, giving off a threatening aura. "Well, now, someone's feeling tough. Coming in to my place of business and expecting something from me. You've crossed the line now, Sai. I hope you don't have any..." He said, holding the other platter out as I took a defensive stance. He then pulled the the sheet off the platter, revealing 4 black revolvers with purple outlines, hammers and trigger/hand guards. Just like Scarborough fair, they also housed gems (purple, blue, black, red) on each side of them and hand their set name: Last Regrets, written across the side of the barrel, with another name written below it, different for each gun: Love, Sacrifice, Hope and Regret. "Last regrets." He said, before flinging them into the air. I put my feet on the edge of the bar and pushed off, rolling backwards through the air, catching Love in my right hand, Sacrifice in my left, attaching Hope to my right foot and Regret to my left.

"Not bad. Not bad at all." I said, getting a feel for the smooth surface and leather-like grip of the gun.

Bayonetta finished her drink and set it on the bar, looking at Rodin for a refill. "Pounding 'em down tonight, baby. Not to butt into your affairs, but I'm pretty sure you've got more important places to me. The guys you're up against aren't the type to wait for you to finish around." He said, only to turn and find we were no longer there. He chuckled at this before looking to... "Enzo! Her drinks are going on your tab, buddy!" He told him, firing down the drink she wasn't there to drink. "Ya deadbeat motherfucker." He said, slamming the drink on the table, causing Enzo to fall back in his chair.

* * *

 **Last Regrets: Said to be one of demon-smith Rodin's best works, the four guns Love, Sacrifice, Hope and Regret are unstoppable in the hands of a demon like Sai, channeling and amplifying his demonic energy to the max, these guns have the same hitting and stopping power as the strongest punch the young demon can muster in his Devil Trigger, with a rate of fire to match. They can withstand anything Sai could channel through them, even Demonic Finishers, Sai's version of Wicked Weaves.  
**


	2. If This is Paradise, I've Been Screwed!

I recapped the events of Enzo's explanation in my mind during the nap Bayonetta and I took on the train, still in Purgatorio to avoid suspicion...

 _"So, I asked around and some whale in Europe is trying to fence a huge rock on the black market. He calls it the "Right Eye", saying it's part of some set called the "The Eyes of the world." Fits the bill of what you're after, don't it. Now, here's the funny bit: the stone passes around the halls of power for hundreds of years, vanishes and then the black market goes white hot for the thing. But the seller wanted an arm and a leg for it, to the point no one could stomach the price. So back goes the stone, but not before everyone figures out where the guy is." He informed us, before chuckling. "You're gonna enjoy doing this one, I bet. I love sticking it to the rich-" He started._

 _"I'm rich, you asshole." I said._

 _He jumped back a bit nervously at this. "You being the rare exception, of course! But when you get this guy, don't forget that your buddy Enzo stuck his neck out for you on this one. Slide me a few fazoles out of the rich guy's pocket for my troubles, right?!" He asked._

 _"Don't worry, Enzo, I'm sure we can get you a nice present for your services." Bayonetta said._

 _"Greedy motherfucker." I said._

 _"Anyway, you better get going before the trail goes could. Off to the middle of nowhere. The paradise of Europe. Vigrid." He explained..._

Suddenly, my dreams pulled away from the story and changed to several visions and images of a strange demon obtaining incredible power and using it to easily finish me off when I confronted him. I snapped awake at the same time as Bayonetta, who looked at me. "Bad dreams, little one?" She asked.

I sighed in annoyance that she still calls me that from time to time, but I nodded. "Yeah. Looks like something startled you as well." I said.

"Perhaps... Amnesia can be a scary thing..." She said.

We suddenly heard and announcement on the speakers. "Welcome to Vigrid, our final stop. Entry Visas are required for all passengers. Please submit your Vigrid issued Entry Visa for inspection upon disembarking. Please make sure you take all valuable belongings with you." The woman on the overhead informed.

"I don't think we'll be needing any Visas in Purgatorio." I said.

"No, we won't. And should we run into any problems, we have our universal ticket punchers right here." She said, pulling out her Scarborough Fair and tapping them against my Last Regrets.

We got up and made our way down the isle, passing through any other passengers in our way, before we both stopped, hearing voices in our heads. **"So, you have arrived at last, my dear. The time has come to awaken the Eyes of The World. Fear not, my child, such a beautiful woman you've become. I shall always see to it that no harm comes to you."** The voice in Bayonetta's head rang out.

 **"So good to see you, Sai... It's been far too long for my account. You've grown much stronger than the last time we met, I see. I'm eager to see your power first-hand. And test it against my own."** A familiar voice rang through my own head.

The two of us turned around to look for anyone suspicious, but found no one out of the ordinary. "This city must be messing with us. I don't know why, but this place doesn't feel right." I said, a strange skin-crawling feeling suddenly coming over me.

"Yes, something does seem off about this place. I'm sure we'll find out soon enough." Bayonetta said, getting off the train and looking around. "So, this is supposed to be paradise?" She asked.

"With that in mind, I was expecting something more like Hawaii, or the Bahamas. Not this." I said, that feeling still present and showing no signs of going away any time soon. Shrugging it off for now, I followed Bayonetta as we made our way through the station, walking through a metal detector and causing it to go off, triggering the security systems and forcing a lockdown. "We just messed up someone's day." I said.

"Yes. unfortunately, those detectors exist in Purgatorio as well, so it still detected our guns. We might have to do this the hard way." She said, as we continued down the path, seeing the corridor in front of us blocked. She prepared to shoot it, before noticing something strange about the wall beside her. "Hello. What have we here?" She wondered.

"Yeah, this doesn't seem like it belongs here." I said, noticing its strange designs, as well as some form of energy apparently running through it.

"I wonder what would happen if I did THIS!" She wondered striking the wall and firing bullets into it, causing a glow to cover the door. Once it spread completely, the door broke apart, the pieces floating in the air down the path it previously blocked. "Come along now, Sai." She said, heading down the path.

I was slightly shocked at this, but shook it off and followed. Good thing I did, because the second I went through the pathway, the pieces of the wall moved back into place to create the wall and block the path once more. We followed the path to a large gap, with a small area below it and across the gap was an iron door with a large keyhole in the way. "That's a big keyhole." I said.

"Yes and a large key must be needed to unlock it. But I see no such key nearby. Perhaps down there..." Bayonetta said, dropping into the small room below. Inside, we found a strange chest, which she quickly busted open to reveal a massive key. "I believe this fits the bill of what we're after, wouldn't you?" She asked.

"I'd say so." I agreed.

We jumped back up onto the side we'd already been on, but a couple of angels suddenly appeared to stop us. "Sai, deary, deal with this for me, won't you? I have my hands full for the moment." She said, heading towards the iron door.

"Fine by me." I said, turning back to the angels and spinning the guns in my hands. "~I got a pocketful of, pocketful of sunshine~" I sang, approaching the angels as they prepared to swing their weapons at me. "Angels talk shit, I'mma hit 'em with that gunfire!" I snapped, shooting them in the face and killing them.

Bayonetta unlocked the gate and kicked it open, waiting for me as I jumped across, sprouting my raven wings and flapping them for a double jump. "Not much a fan of the rapping, but you handled the angels quite nicely." She said.

"Naturally." I said with a nod, following her into the next room, where there was a statue across from a broken one on either side of the path we had to go, which was a canal of some sorts, meaning Bayonetta would have to run on water in order to make it across, while I could make it with my multiple means of flight.

"This might be a bit tricky..." She said, before a seal suddenly appeared and angels came shortly after. We looked at each other and nodded before splitting off to take on a different group of angels. She landed a few punches, before throwing an axe kick and creating a wicked weave kick to slam down on her to angels, before creating a wicked weave punch to slam into and splatter them.

"Break dancing!" I exclaimed, doing a handstand and spinning with my legs out to repeatedly kick the angels around me in the head and hit them with a few bullets, before I did a handspring to clear some distance, landing in a handstand again and pulling my legs forward in front of me, before driving them back and creating my own Demonic Finishers in the form of two feet shooting out in a drop kick to slam into the angels with the same effectiveness as Bayonetta's punch, splattering them as well.

With the threat gone, Bayonetta then blew a kiss at the barrier, her demonic witch powers overtaking the holy angel energy and destroying the barrier, sending the angelic energy to hell. As this happened, the broken statue reformed into a statue of an Umbran Witch to be a counterpart for the Lumen Sage statue to its right. With both statues restored, they then displayed a message written in Enochian, the language of angels... that Bayonetta also uses to summon her demons, for some reason. "I believe this is my specialty. You can't read Enochian." She said, stepping forward, reading the message it displayed. "'Lumen Sage and Umbran Witch, when their powers meet in a test of strength, the lightning released shall be your test. If you wish to walk upon water, prove your mettle by dodging the lightning within a hair's breadth.'" She recited, apparently understanding the riddle. "Very well." She said, creating a pair of Wicked Arms to raise the statues, then drop them, initiating some sequence to activate a lightning strike, the two of us dodging a bolt of lightning at the last second, activating Witch/Bullet Time as a result, bringing everything to barely a crawl, even the water standing still to the point it was solid enough to walk on.

"That works." I said as the two of us quickly ran across the canal. We ran across to the other side and noticed another one of the strange walls. "I got this one." I said, landing several hits and bullets to the wall until it broke apart, turning into a lift, allowing us to ride to an upper level.

We made our way down the hallway ahead of us into a lobby of some sorts, before noticing a demonic portal to our left Rodin emerged from. "I knew it. This town is teeming with heaven's little helpers. It's making my buddies downstairs awfully nervous." He said.

"From what I've seen, they're not that hard to shake up in the first place." I said.

"And your point is?" Bayonetta asked.

"Some places in this world are closer to Paradiso or Inferno. That rathole of a town you and I live in is close to both, while that mountain Sai calls home is closer to Inferno." He explained.

"Home, sweet home." I said gingerly.

"But the Vigridians got a special air about 'em. They're closer to Paradiso than anyone should ever be. That shit just plain creeps me out." He said.

"That must be that skin-crawling feeling I'm getting." I said in slight annoyance of the scaly feeling that refused to leave me.

"Yeah. Demons ain't supposed to be near Paradiso. It ain't gonna kill ya, but it's definitely no stay at the Ritz." He explained.

"Never been, my aunt runs a chain of hotels all over I usually stay at." I explained.

"Which are closer to Inferno, I've noticed. Very nice. But in the mean time, I guess I'm gonna have to set up shop here and score me some halos. These stupid rings are worth a fortune back home. Since it seems you two are spoiling for a fight, if you come across any of these, bring 'em to me and I'll hook you up." He said.

Bayonetta sighed at this. "Another who's looking to line his pockets." She said, before letting out a chuckle. "I'm beginning to see why Enzo is so fond of you." She said.

The sound of hitting the brakes could be heard as I looked at her with a "WTF" face. "Were you not hearing the shit he was talking at the funeral?" I asked.

"Real cute, but let's get one thing straight: your fights are yours alone. I'm only here to watch my handiwork in action, so don't get any bright ideas about coming to me for help." He warned.

"I'm all the help she needs." I said.

She nodded as I said this, before looking back at Rodin. "No, you get one thing straight: I'm not the slightest bit interested in the fact you made my guns, or the little one's." She started, to which I growled. "If you get in our way, I will... how do the Americans put it?" She asked, to which I whispered the answer in her ear. "Oh, yes: Bust a cap in you ass." She said, aiming one of the guns at Rodin.

"Right on, baby! Right on!" He said, laughing demonically as he retreated into the portal he came from.

"That guy always gives me the creeps." I said.

"A bit of a shady fellow, yes. But he does make some wonderful toys." She said, kissing one of her guns.

"Yeah, those Elven Knight rip-offs can't hold a candle to these." I agreed, spinning the guns in my hands.

We then headed down the path in front of us to what looked like some kind of park. We were about to proceed to the building in front of us, but stopped when we saw flowers blooming all around us, followed by the familiar golden light of the angels descending towards us and their doom, with a slightly larger angel with a blue robe landing in front of them, known as an Applaud. It screeched loudly, destroying some of the flowers around us and signaling the other angels to attack soon. Bayonetta simply smirked at this, pulling out her guns and adjusting her glasses with them, releasing a burst of demonic energy that destroyed the rest of the flowers as we prepared to fight as well.

 **Background Music: "Monster" by Skillet  
**

We split off to take on smaller groups again, Bayonetta swiftly beating down a number of angels, including the Applaud, while I landed between two angels with saxophones for weapons, tricking them into firing at me, at which point I dodged the attacks and caused their sound wave... bubble.. things, to hit each other and kill them, allowing me to roll into a group of 6 angels and with a single spin, fired and shot all of them in the head, killing them. Four more flew in at me, but I backflipped out of the way and crushed them with a Demonic Finisher First to smash down on all of them.

Back with Bayonetta, after she beat the first couple of angels, more appeared and swung at her, but she dodged, kicking one of the small flying angels at one of the others, killing them both instantly and allowing Bayonetta to grab its fallen staff, swinging it and dealing great damage to nearby demons, before stabbing the staff into the ground and spinning on it like a stripper pole, while laying down a 360 of gunfire, killing the rest of her angels and even some of mine while I had to dodge her bullets. "Hey, watch it!" I said.

Suddenly, a huge angelic portal opened up from the ground and a massive angel clawed its way out of the portal, brandishing an equally massive axe it had held on its back a moment before. "Well, now. That's more like it. It looks like they're finally willing to challenge us." She said, rushing in.

"Don't think you're gonna hog all the fun!" I said, rushing in along with her. We both fired as we rushed in at the angel, dodging its axe. "It's time to stop!" I said as I activated Bullet Time,the two of us rushing in, Bayonetta landing painful hits to its legs and lower body, breaking away the stone-like skn, revealing and damaging the flesh underneath while I landed some devastating hits to the glowing orb on the monster's back, dealing major damagfrom hitting its weak spot.

"It's time we brought this big boy down to size!" Bayonetta said, landing crushing blows with her wicked weaves and using two hands to bring it to its knees.

"Let's see if he can fly!" I said, creating a Finisher Fist to uppercut the angel into the air about 20 feet and causing it to crash down on its back hard.

"Well done, little one. I suppose we can put it out of its misery now." She said, looking at the angel as it struggled to get up, supporting itself with its axe. She prepared to summon a demon, but I stopped her.

"I got this one." I said, doing some hand signs. "Zuuru, Onara!" I announced in Japanese. A portal behind the massive angel then opened. Translation to my summon: "Zuul, mothafucka, ZUUL!" A massive dragon-like dog roared as it leapt from the portal, tackling the angel to the ground and tearing massive chunks from the angel, grabbing it by the head an flinging it 20 feet up in the air, jumping as it started to fall back down and chomping down on it as it fell into its mouth, breaking off all the limbs and body parts that weren't in its mouth, leaving mere scraps of the massive angel left as it roared and retreated back into the portal.

 **End Music**

With the angel destroyed, the light faded and everything returned to normal, with the exception of two golden records appearing from nowhere. "What are these?" I asked, walking over and picking up one, handing the other to Bayonetta.

"Not sure, to be honest. Perhaps Rodin might have an idea. Let's hope he has another one of those gates close by." She said as we proceeded ahead. We went into the building ahead, were a couple of angels broke through the windows on the right-had side, but they were easily dealt with by a couple of bullets.

We encountered another one of the strange walls and she destroyed it, but shortly after we went through she stopped, looking as if sh was seeing something familiar. "Something wrong?" I asked, but she suddenly took off, shooting into the air as if trying to shoot some bird only she saw. "Bayonetta, wait!" I said, about to run after her, but then a figure dropped down in front of me.

"Not so fast there, boy." A familiar voice rang out. Then, a familiar figure dropped down in front of me. He was 6'6", with short red hair and black horns coming from his head, pointing backwards. He wore what looked and fit like a leather ninja suit, but it was metallic, with red-eyed dragon spaulders (shoulder armor), he wore a red scarf covering the lower half of his face and another red cloth crossed over his left eye, leaving only his red right eye to look at me. He then pulled down the scarf to completely reveal his face. He was Zeidan, known as Crimsoncrash for charging into his foes and reducing them to bloody corpses in an instant. He's also one of my uncles on my mother's side and unlike the rest of our clan, he believed the demons should be ruling over the humans, so he rebelled and was exiled. He shall be voiced by Willem Dafoe.

"You! What are you doing here?! And why are you stopping me from reaching her?!" I demanded, aiming my guns at him.

"Hey, now, that's no way to greet your uncle! Besides, that girl's got a little remembering to do. You see, me and a friend of mine have some big plans for her, but she's got some remembering to do first. But as for you, you're just in the way. However, like I said, you've gotten much stronger since the last time I've seen you. And I kinda want that power for myself. So I was thinking of taking it. And your life." He said, readying a pair of Jagkommando Tri-Daggers, the deadliest human-made knives EVER, look it up.

"Try it, you son of a bitch!" I snapped, firing at him.

 **Background Music: "Traitor" by Daughtry**

He dodged the bullets and slashed at me, but I blocked with the gun in my right hand and raised it over my head, forcing his arm into the air as well, allowing me to shoot him in the chest and blast him back, but not before he got a vicious slash on my stomach. I hissed in pain at the wound while he growled at his own, but both of them sealed in an instant and we re-engaged, him rushing at me while I zipped up my trench coat for protection and flipping the hood, but my face was still vulnerable. He thrust both knives at my chest, but I jumped over him, getting my feet on the back of his head, before firing and launching myself off of him and shooting him in the head, taking him to the ground, face-first while I landed safely and spun around to face him once more. But he still managed to get up from that, turning and facing me. "I gotta admit, you are good." He said.

"Probably because I never learned from you." I countered.

"That's a shame, because you still have a lot to learn." He said, throwing his knives into the air. I looked up as he threw them, not realizing as he drew a second pair with paper bombs attached to them and threw them at my feet, detonating as soon as they hit the ground and launching me back, causing me to hit the wall behind me. I looked up and he was upon me in an instant, slamming into me and repeatedly trying to stab me with the knives. They couldn't get through my trench coat, but I was still feeling the points jab into me. "What?" He demanded, looking up as I used this moment of recovery to headbutt him, breaking his nose and forcing him back. "Impressive coat. I guess if I can't get through it, I'll just go for your head!" He snapped, rushing in again, but I had a trick for this.

I used instant transmission to teleport to where he was, appearing behind him as he rushed forward, striking where I once was, but finding nothing there. "Guess I'm a fast learner." I said, firing at him and filling him with bullets, finishing by hitting him with a Finisher Fist, slamming him against a wall, then having a Finisher Foot smash down on him.

He looked up and growled at this. "Then here's your final lesson. How can you hit what isn't there?" He demanded, suddenly vanishing.

"Damn!" I said worriedly, looking all around. To be safe, I lit myself on fire to ensure he couldn't get me without burning himself. But then, the flames were blown out and not even a second later, one of his knives was jammed into my throat, causing me to cough up blood. Like Serena, he has control over wind. He'd been using the wind to move move water vapors around him, refracting the light and almost making himself invisible. He then dragged the knife down, cutting through me and unzipping my trench coat, leaving me vulnerable. He then kicked me to the ground and slammed a knee down on my stomach, kneeling over me and repeatedly stabbing me.

"Looks like you failed, kid. Don't worry, I'll let your Mom know... as I'm choking the life out of her." He said, readying the knives to decapitate me.

"Choke this!" I said, shooting a fireball from my mouth and staggering him, allowing me to get up, put both guns to his face and fire, blasting him back.

 **End Music**

He got up and glared at me again. "Damn you!" He said, preparing to attack again, but a Wicked Kick suddenly launched him over the cliff. "This isn't the end, Sai! When all is said and done, the Blades will be cowering before me alongside the rest of humanity!" He shouted as he flew away after sprouting his vulture wings.

"Thanks." I said, walking up to Bayonetta.

"Honestly, you are too much of a handful. I can't even have an out-of-body experience without you getting into trouble." She said.

"I think there will just be more trouble if we keep going like this." I warned her.

"Well, we've already come all the way to Europe, it'd be a total waste if we just went home now. Perhaps Rodin has something that can make our journey a bit easier." She said, gesturing to the portal off to our side.

"If you say so." I said, following her down.

We arrived in the Gates of Hell and walked up to the counter. "Hey, check this out: 'Whaddya buyin?!' Heh heh. Heard that in a game once." He said.

"Resident Evil 4. Classic." I said, fist-bumping the fallen angel.

"I'd hate to interrupt your little bonding session, but by chance, do you know what these are?" Bayonetta asked, the two of us producing the golden records we'd retrieved earlier.

"Well, well, an Angelic Hymns Gold LP. Got yourselves on something awfully rare, haven't ya?" He asked.

"We don't know, that's why we're asking you." I said.

"And it certainly sounds like you know what it is." Bayonetta added.

"Those things are the perfect bait to coax out some of Hell's uglies. One note hits their ears and a damn who's who of Inferno comes pouring out of the inner circles. Then I can use them to breathe life into what I make best... weapons of mass destruction." He explained.

"I already love these things." I said, looking at the records.

"Yep. So tell ya what, you give me those records and I'll whip up something so fiendish, angels will cry at the sight of it." He explained.

"They're yours." She said as we handed them over.

"I'll just have to pop down to the tropics for a bit, so take a load off." He said, creating a portal and diving into Inferno. We sat down and waited, but sure enough, MAYBE five minutes later, he emerged from the portal, bloodied and battered, but victorious. "All done... They sure were a handful. If there's one thing you can say about the folks in Inferno, they're pretty rude. They make up for it with charm, though. So be nice to 'em, okay?" He asked, putting a couple of shotguns on the table in front of Bayonetta. And in front of me, he set a pair of assassin's swords, similar to cutlasses with blades the curve backwards, then upwards with holes in the bottom of the blades just before the black hilts. The handles are blue while small blades are attached onto the guards.

 **Ghostshade: A vicious, greedy demon of the shadows who would attack anything around him as soon as he heard a sound, leaving anything unfortunate enough to be around at the time horribly wounded and stripped of any valuables they had at the time. These blades are perfect reflections of him, letting the user move like shadows and strike like a monster.**

"Oh, I can have some fun with these!" I said, eagerly taking the blades, wielding them backhand.

"Excellent work, Rodin. I'm sure these will wipe the smirk right off an angel's face... along with its face." Bayonetta said as we left. "Well, I'm feeling much better now." She said as we emerged back in Vigrid.

"I guess." I said as we went down the bridge, only to be stopped as another massive angel climbed up the wall behind the bridge, grabbed it, ripped it from its proper place and smashed it into a wall, trying to shake us off. "Well, now we get the perfect chance to use these!" I said, striking at the hand holding the bridge, clouds of darkness coming from the blades after each slash and the angel's hand starting to corrode away.

"Indeed. Let's see if they're as charming as Rodin says!" She agreed, blasting at the angel's face with the shotguns. It eventually roared in pain and threw the bridge away. "Jump!" She ordered, the two of us leaping to a large ledge not too far away, the only possible place we could've jumped to. We both jumped, me landing in a badass 3-point landing while Bayonetta landed in a sexy cat pose, a picture being taken from nowhere for some reason. We headed down the stairs to reach the door to the next area, but just before we reached the platform in front of the door, the staircase began to crumble as the giant angel somehow made its way from where it threw the bridge to where we were now, climbing up the staircase and breaking it with every step. We quickly retreated to the main platform, shooting at the angel as he chased after us until he completely broke the stairs, holding onto the platform for dear life with half his body on it, half hanging over the edge.

I then noticed the platform began to break. "He's too heavy! If we don't get him off quick, he'll send this whole platform down to cliff!" I said urgently, rushing in and punching at the angels chest, using the small blades on Ghostshade's guards to fill him with holes.

"Then it's time to ditch the DEAD weight." Bayonetta said, blasting away at the monster with the shotgun, blowing off chunks of stone skin and flesh. In a matter of moments, the angel was on the brink of death, yet somehow refused to let go of the platform, holding on with an unbreakable grip. "I believe it's my turn this time..." Bayonetta said, stepping forward and doing her summoning dance. "AVAVAGO!" Bayonetta cast the incantation (translation: Thunders), hear hair removing itself from her body as her clothes, a few strands still spiraling around her to hide her naughty bits, the rest going into a portal behind her and coming out of the way behind the angel, Gomorrah's massive head and neck coming from the portal, at which point the angel began screeching like a monkey in fear while trying to scramble away from the demon, even trying to grab Bayonetta while it believed her to be distracted but to no avail as she easily smacked its hand away, at which point Gomorrah snatched it in hs jaws and began chomping down on it, repeatedly crushing its body in his massive jaws, before smashing it head-first into the wall, destroying its head, before scarfing down the rest of its body and letting out a triumphant, elephant-like roar, before retreating back into the portal, Bayonetta's hair redressing her as we stepped to the edge of the platform.

It is SO much more fun being on this side of the summon and not the side getting eaten." I said, remembering back to when I myself was almost crushed by those jaws.


	3. Lots of Childhood Trauma!

We prepared to move on, but before we could, we noticed a motorcycle flying towards us, covered in angels. It lands in front of us and the driver is revealed to be Jeanne. Suddenly, Damion jumped off the back and shooting several demons in the air while Jeanne beats the shit out of them with the motorcycle. Bayonetta and I are forced to dodge her once and shoot a couple angels that had been trying to chase her that turned their attention to us. "Fancy seeing you here. Out to find some answers about your past, are we?" Jeanne asked while somehow staying on the wall with her motorcycle.

"You've quite the familiar face. And using the same powers... But you'll have to forgive me, do we know each other?" Bayonetta asked.

Damion landed a few feet in front of me. "So, how are you liking this city?" He asked.

"Eh. Not my kinda place. Too angelic for me." I said.

"I can relate to that. This place is sickeningly close to Paradiso. I'll be happy when I can leave. But I won't be able to do that until I get rid of you." He said.

"Yeah, good luck with that." I smirked.

"Same powers? Don't make me laugh. Your little dip in that lake has left you a bit rusty." Jeanne taunted, placing her feet up on the front of the bike.

"I've been high and dry for 20 years. The only rust on me is from the lack of any real challenge. Perhaps you're up for the task?" Bayonetta asked.

Jeanne chuckled at this. "You've already disappointed me." She said, revealing she had Bayonetta's Umbran Watch. Bayonetta was shocked as she looked down, indeed noticing her watch was gone.

"How the hell-!?" I demanded, about to go after her, but Damion shot at my feet.

"Ah, ah, ah. This is between them." He said, blocking my way.

With that, Bayonetta lunged for her watch as Jeanne threw it into the air and wheeled around her bike, the two shooting at each other while they tried to claim the item they fought over, Jeanne snatching it from the air and landing on the platform Damion and I still stood on, Bayonetta landing nearby shortly after. "This is a moment I've long desired, but you've forgotten your destiny and wasted the past 20 years." Jeanne said, tossing the watch back to Bayonetta.

"You're right. I do seem to be having trouble remembering things as of late. Would you be so kind as to take it from the top?" Bayonetta asked.

"Two overseers. The eyes of the world. They are the power behind everything. But perhaps a few hits to the head will better jog your memory." Jeanne said, driving towards Bayonetta, drawing her guns. Bayonetta jumped out of the way and managed to shoot the back tire, forcing Jeanne to jump off as the bike came off the ground and flew over the cliff, the two doing battle on the ground.

"Bayonetta!" I called, trying to go over to her, but Damion once more blocked my way, kicking me in the stomach and blasting me back with the revolver connected to his shoe.

"What did I tell you? This is between them. You and me have our own business to take care of." He said.

"I don't like mixing business and pleasure, but I'm going to enjoy this far more than I should." I said, getting up and taking a stance.

"You ready for this?" Damion asked.

"I'm always ready. I'm a brave boy." I said, pulling out Ghostshade.

"Is that so?" He asked, pulling out an unbelievable weapon. It was a MASSIVE greatsword that could put the Dragon Slayer to shame. It's got a 3 foot wooden handle and a foot wide, 7 foot long blade. "Say hello to Fissure. This baby's strong enough to make a mountain grumble with one swing." He boasted.

I looked at the weapon in shock, my body becoming a silhouette and a chibi version of myself appearing in my head. "Not a brave enough boy for this!" It said, tossing his chibi versions of Ghostshade aside and running for its life.

 **Background Music: "I Will Not Bow" by Breakin Benjamin**

He swung the massive sword at me from the left while I blocked with both swords, getting pushed back a bit, but managing to hold the blade back, at which point I ran towards him while still pushing against the sword, sparks flying from both weapons. I got right up to the edge of the blade before the handle, then swung as fast as I could before the blade could hit me, slashing his stomach, forcing him to jump back. "A giant sword like that could do major damage, but not if its too slow to hit an opponent... or if they have enough time to block." I said.

"You're not bad. But I'm just getting started." He said, tossing the massive weapon into the air and catching it backhand, before rushing in. I slashed at his head, but he ducked and jabbed the hilt of the weapon into my stomach, doubling me over and allowing him to bring the handle upwards and hit me in the chin, forcing me to stagger. before he swung the full weapon around and slashed me deep across the chest and throwing me back, my heart nearly slipping out of the massive opening in my chest.

"No! My organs! Stay in there! Stay in your home! Daddy needs you!" I said, before sighing in relief as the wound sealed. "Oh, that's better. I probably don't need those organs, though. I'd just regenerate them and move on. But there'd be about a half a minute there when I'd just be inconsolable." I said to myself, before looking up in time to see Damion running in and slashing at me with his sword. I quickly jumped into the air to avoid it and did a triple flip in the air as I landed behind Damion, before spinning around and slashing his back, then punching and stabbing him several times with the guard blades.

"Enough!" He shouted, throwing his elbow back into me and sending me flying, almost over the edge of the platform, but I stopped myself with Ghostshade.

"Had enough?" I asked him.

"I'm just getting started." He said, suddenly disappearing. He reappeared behind me, but I activated Bullet Time and stopped him when the blade was mere inches from me. I moved under it and around to his open side and landed a few hits of my own, before he managed to dodge an attack and activated his own Bullet Time, slamming his sword into me and flinging me back into a wall, which he then rushed in and impaled me against.

I coughed up some blood, blinding him and using the moment to stab him in both sides of the neck where they connect to the shoulder, then kicked him and blasted him back with the guns on my feet, ripping the blades out of his shoulders for a little extra damage in the process, knocking him back into Jeanne, who Bayonetta had just kicked away as well. They recovered from the initial attack well enough, but stumbled a bit when they crashed into each other, taking them off balance, leaving them open. "You forgot something!" I told him, flinging the sword at him, this time impaling him while Bayonetta rushed in and hit Jeanne with a flying kick, sending them both flying and coming to a stop just before going over the platform.

 **End music**

They both got up and glared at us, Damion looking like he still wanted to fight, but Jeanne calmed down and put a hand on his shoulder. "Not bad, but still not enough. We'll let you go this time. But we will meet again and you shall not be so lucky." Jeanne said, the two of them getting on her bike and driving over the edge, disappearing.

"Not bad, yeah right. We totally won." I said, earning a smack upside the head from Bayonetta. "Ow, what?" I asked.

"You still have much to learn, little one. They were holding back. If they had fought us at full power, we would've been defeated." She said, before smirking and looking down at her now glowing feet. "Still, I can't say the event wasn't... enlightening." She said, jumping to a wall and sticking to it.

"Nice! You're learning new tricks by the day. Or night, rather." I said, jumping onto the wall with her. We then continued on our way, dealing with a handful of the tiny flying head angels halfway to our goal, but we dealt with them easily, only needing a few bullets to put them down. We then got onto the wall above the path the big angel had previously destroyed, before the moon vanished behind the clouds, causing Bayonetta to drop. "So, it's not perfect, but still cool." I said, dropping down after her.

"I'm sure I'll have more opportunities to use it." She said as we continued.

We proceeded ahead and encountered one of those magic walls that disappear when you beat them, but after I beat them, it instantly replaced itself before we had the chance to go through. "What the?! There's no way to make it through that!" I said.

"Not under normal circumstances." Bayonetta said, walking back down the path we came from, looking at the statues of a Lumen sage and Umbran witch I didn't notice before. She snapped her fingers and created two Wicked Weave hands to hold up the statues, before we headed to the wall. Once we were there, she snapped her fingers again, dodging the lightning bolt and activating Witch Time, beating on the wall and knocking it back, the two of us quickly heading through before Witch Time ended and the wall put itself back in place.

We proceeded onward into the town square, but then heard a commotion. Looking down the street, we saw a guy in a their ceremonial hoods or cloaks or whatever over his suit, making him look like he was ripped from Assassin's Creed, running away from a police officer. "Stop!" The cop demanded.

However, he continued to evade arrest, plowing through several people in the way and even jumping off one guy's shoulders, the world slowing down for a moment as doves flew past him and the sun illuminated the scene as if to prove how epic it was. "LIFE FINDS A WAY!" A gruff voice rang out from nowhere. (Sarge from Red vs. Blue)

He hit the ground and kept running, ducking into a side street, rushing down it and making a left while the cop kept running straight. Despite having lost the cop chasing him, the man continued to run, shocking a woman on the street. He came to a sudden stop after passing her, before turning walking backwards back to her. He adjusted his coat and flipped back his hood revealing his wavy bangs and ponytail. "Do you believe in fate?" He asked, flipping his scarf out of the way. He pushed her back and leapt back himself as the cop came from nowhere and tried to charge him, but missed and fell to the ground. "Fate brought us here together and it will never tear us apart." He told her, taking a few steps closer to her, then stepping to the right and walking backwards, tripping over a table with flowers all over it, leaving her looking slightly concerned. He quickly recovered, however, standing up with a rose, which he kissed before tossing it to her.

He then gave her a salute before taking off as the cop got back up, having to round a motorcycle in between them before he could continue his pursuit. "Dammit! I said stop! I'm authorized to use deadly force!" He snapped (then why do you only have a baton?). The man reached the middle of the square and used a grappling hook to vanish from the scene, leaving the cop confused and bewildered. "Blast it! Where'd that bugger go!?" He demanded. (For the uninitiated: Vigrid is in Norway... so why the hell does this guy have a British accent? I've heard Norwegian accents and that wasn't it.)

Once the coast was clear, the man dropped down, retracting his grappling hook. "Sayonara." He said, waving to the retreating officer, starting to go on his way, then stopped when he caught a familiar scent in the wind. "Fleur de Cirey, Eau du Parfum. What a lovely floral bouquet, with its subtle hints of rosemary." He deduced as Bayonetta circled him, although still in Purgatorio. "You know, in the language of flowers, rosemary equates to remembrance." He said, looking at Bayonetta as she stood in front of him, almost as if he could see her. "Which doesn't quite equate to you now does it? Bayonetta!" He said, throwing off his cloak and wheeling around with a camera, looking in a window, allowing him to see her reflection behind him in Purgatorio.

But before he could get the shot, she got her own, shooting straight up into the air to scare him. "Shit!" He screamed, then gasped when he realized he'd lost his camera.

 _"Not bad, stalker boy, but you gotta be a little quicker than that."_ I told him, waving his camera in front of him, before smashing it. (the italics are because our voices are distorted, hearing them in the human world from Purgatorio.)

"Dammit! Those are expensive!" He said, before sighing. "Ahh, yes... And how could I forget: Blade Clan #2: Indulgence. A powerful, yet light cologne, with elements of Lavender, Dark Cherry and Black Roses. Some, however, call it an evil fragrance, as Lavender and dark cherries are both well known sleep inducers and black roses are often used as symbols of death." He said.

"Well, one thing you forgot about the cherries, smart-ass, they help fight cancer, so there." I said, before turning to the 4th wall. "That's true, they help fight cancer and other diseases, look it up." I said, firing at his feet, causing him to jump back again.

"Will you stop that?!" He snapped.

 _"That little bug on Enzo was a nice touch. Seeing you here, I suppose it wasn't the only one. You've certainly bloomed, haven't you, my little Cheshire puss?"_ She teased him.

"I'm not your pet. The name is Luka. A name you better remember." He said, taking a few steps back, unaware of Bayonetta right behind him, a little to his right.

"I've already forgotten it." I said as she tripped him. She scoffed and started to walk away. "By the way watch out." I said, taking a few steps back as well as he looked up and noticed the falling cafe' sign or whatever it was.

"Shit!" He said, rolling out of its way. "Dammit, wait! You can't just run away from me like that!" He snapped.

 _"Said every stalker ever."_ I taunted.

"Shut up, dammit! I'm not a stalker! I'm a journalist who wants the truth and justice! I know what I saw that day!" He snapped, the camera zooming in on his eyes as we got a flashback to his childhood 20 years ago.

He waited on the shore while his father, Antonio Redgrave, dove under the lake to discover and open Bayonetta's casket. However, it went horribly wrong in an instant. In a bright flash and an explosion of magic and water, Bayonetta and Antonio were floating in the air while Bayonetta resonated powerful magical energy and Antonio was spread out as far as he could stretch, which slowly and painfully increased as he screamed in pain until he was drawn and quartered (ripped apart). "FATHER!" He cried out, reaching for his dad, but it was too late.

Back to now, Luka strutted down the street, trying to pick up traces of us again. "I know all about your kind. Sure, my colleagues laugh at me for chasing fairy tales..." He said, before muttering under his breath. "...amongst other things..." He muttered, before speaking up again. "But I know they're real! I know the truth!" He said as angels appeared behind him.

"And the truth might just get you killed." I said.

"And you: you were even easier to dig up info on then she was. You're part of the Blade clan. Demons that SUPPOSEDLY protect humans and vanquish evil!" He snapped.

"Motherfucker, SUPPOSEDLY?!" I demanded.

"But where were you when she killed my father?! And why do you work with her when she's a cold-hearted killer!?" He demanded.

"Okay, first of all, that was 20 years ago. Where was I? Not even born yet. Second of all, we can't be there to stop every crime that ever happens in the world, we have our own agenda with more serious stuff. There's too much evil in this world and surprisingly, not enough of us. Third, we're fighting the things that actually killed your dad." I told him.

"Liar!" He snapped, turning and walking back and forth in front of the angels. "This smell... It's the same smell that clung to the air the day my father was murdered. Which means I'm right on your doorstep... Bayonetta!" He said, pointing to an angel as it lunged at him, but Bayonetta stepped in and shot it, startling him again.

"The consider that the beware of dog sign... No, wait. This is." I said, summoning...

"Zuul, little mothafucka's, ZUUL!" Zuul roared as he lunged out of the portal I created and slammed his paws down on two of the angels, snapping his jaws down on another one in mid-air and scarfing it down.

"In other words, get the hell off my doorstep." I said, rushing in and jumping onto Zuul's back, then jumping into the air, spinning and shooting several more angels, then sending the dog/dragon back to hell.

"I'll let you in on a little secret, Cheshire..." Bayonetta said, walking past him.

"The name is Luka!" He said, ducking and staggering around as the ground shook and he saw bullets impacting everywhere. He looked to the window to see what was going on, but Bayonetta shot and shattered it before he got the chance.

"You need to hone your sense of smell, my dear... There's no rosemary in the perfume. After all, rosemary is a demon repellent." She said.

"Hate the stuff!" I confirmed from the air as I rode on an angel's back, repeatedly stabbing it until it crashed.

Bayonetta dodge an angel's attack, activating Witch Time, attacking and killing a few of its friends behind it, before kicking it to the ground, straddling it and repeatedly pistol whipping its junk before crushing it under a Wicked Kick, then kicking another one into an Iron Maiden. Meanwhlle, I did a low spinning move to slice the legs off a number of angels and kill them when they hit the ground, then stopping and stabbing another one whose legs I sliced, but didn't kill, pulling myself up and doing a handstand on the swords, using my feet guns to shoot the demons. Bayonetta picked up the flail of the angel she threw in the Iron Maiden and masterfully used it to kill two more angels. I jumped up and fought the larger angel in mid-air, dodging his attacks before landing several of my own, knocking him to the ground and summoning a bunch of Gremlins to rip him apart.

Another, larger group with two bigger angels then appeared, Bayonetta jumping up and creating a pulley and chain to kill the first one in mid-air while I made the Gremlins somehow turn a car into a table saw, which I dragged the angel two before pushing it headfirst into the blade, splitting it in half down to the waist, before I sent the Gremlins back to hell, who dragged the angel and saw with them. "Sai!" Bayonetta called, nodding her head. I understood, nodded back and rushed in, throwing a flying kick to an angel's face and sending it flying, then Bayonetta grabbed the ankle of the leg I kicked with, spinning while holding me outwards to shoot the angels with my 3 other guns, laying down a deadly 360 of fire, easily killing the group of angels.

But then, another of the giant angels appeared, jumping out of its portal on the ground and swinging its axe, the two of us easily dodging, Bayonneta attacking its feet and the smaller angels around them while I attacked the orb on its back. We were doing good and almost managed to kill it, before it suddenly climbed up the building behind us and retreated. "Aww, you pansy!" I taunted him.

"Let him go. He's bound to show up again and cause more trouble." She said.

"Then we'll get him." I agreed, the two of us doing back to back handstands and laying down another 360 of fire on the rest of the angels, killing them and allowing Bayonetta to break the seal.

Luka walked back into the middle of the square, confused at what just happened, but took the sign that he could no longer smell her as the sign she'd run away. "You only run away so fast because you know you've got something to run from... Me! But you can't escape me forever!" He shouted, unaware of Bayonetta standing behind him with her eyes closed as he grappled away.

I walked up to her, noticing the sad look on her face. "You know, you should at least tell him you didn't do it." I told her.

"I know... But that wouldn't change the fact his father died and I couldn't stop it." She said, walking ahead.

We continued down the path we were on and almost reached the left turn to lead us to our destination, when suddenly, we heard an explosion and saw a street train on its side skidding towards us. "Holy crap!" I said as we both jumped high above it to avoid it. "That was close." I said.

"And I'm assuming it wasn't an accident." She said, glaring at the train. Sure enough, a trio of Enchants, fiery wheel angels, jumped out of the train and attacked us, but they were easy to handle. Bayonetta grabbed one while I grabbed the other two and we flung the three of them into each other and destroyed them. We then continued on our way, but was once again blocked off by another group of angels, 5 more enchants to be precise. Bayonetta masterfully trapped 3 of them in a deadly combo and finished them with a Wicked Kick, while I blocked the 4th one's attacks and grabbed it, spinning and flinging it into the 5th one, killing them off. We expected this to be the end, but then the giant angel who ran off before came back, roaring and charging at us for revenge. "There now, what did I tell you?" She said.

"You showed me." I said as we rushed in, Bayonetta jumping up to avoid its axe while I rushed past and slid under the angel, getting up behind it. Bayonetta then backflip-kicked the angel's chin, snapping its head back and dazing it, allowing me to come in and hit it with another powerful strike to its back orb. It then roared in pain and raised its axe to the sky, calling for help, which another giant angel answered. "Two on two... I guess that's fair." I said.

"Indeed. You take care of our new friend. I'll put our old, tired one to bed." She said.

"Of course she gets the easy, weakened one." I mumbled.

"What was that?" She asked.

"Nothing!" I said, rushing at the healthier angel. Bayonetta quickly landed a powerful combo to weaken her angel to the point of total exhaustion, before summoning Gomorrah and having him chomp the poor bastard to death. Meanwhile, I dodged a strike from its axe, getting behind it and landing several slashes and shot on its back, before dodging again as it reached back for me. I then went for its face, slashing it with my left blade, turning and shooting it with my left foot gun, then my right, then finishing the 360 and slashing it in the face with my right blade. It grabbed me and attempted to crush me, but I pushed its hands back with a blast of demonic energy, before blasting it in the face with a large fireball from my mouth. It dropped down in exhaustion as well, at which point I summoned Zuul once again, but the angel was more prepared this time and tried to run.

"Zuul mothafuck- Ey!" He snapped as the angel dodged his jaws and tried to run, but it was all in vain as Zuul easily chased after him and tackled him to the ground. "ZUUL, YOU COCKSUCKING MOTHAFUCKA! **ZUUL!** " He roared as he tore the angel to shreds, letting out a proud howl before returning to hell.

"You know, we never see the full bodies of your demons... at least Gomorrah. I wonder what the rest of his body looks like." I wondered.

"Hopefully, there will never be a reason to find out, little one. Come along." She said as we continued down the path. **(Epic Foreshadowing)**

We continued ahead, noticing a broken statue of an Umbran Witch across from a Lumen sage one. Ignoring it for now, we went down the nearby stairs to where there was a small cliff with another changing wall nearby. I threw a fireball at it, breaking it in one shot and turning it into a bridge, but it almost immediately changed back into a wall. Suddenly, two Applauds appeared and attacked, but we finished them off pretty easily, me by quickly stabbing and circling around mine to slice it in half, Bayonetta by slamming hers back and forth over her shoulder and into the ground. "With them out of the way, the Umbran statue should be fixed." I said.

"Only one way to find out." She said, hurrying up the stairs and up to the two now fully intact statues and doing the ritual to bring down the lightning bolt and slow down time. With that, she quickly hurried back and turned the wall into a bridge, the two of us hurrying across.

From there, we continued into a small church, walking in and discovering nothing, but then we heard some footsteps behind us. We turned around, but saw nothing. "We're not alone..." I said dramatically.

"You're right. Who's there?" She wondered, stepping to the side and aiming her gun at what looked like a little girl running down towards her, but she just went straight through her due to us being in Purgatorio. "Of course..." She said, rolling her eyes, making a portal to return to the human world.

"Try not to aim your gun at the kid this time. That's frowned upon." I said, repeating the action.

We reappeared in the human world and Bayonetta this time managed to get the girl to stop... by pointing the gun at her. "You've played enough hide and seek, my scurrying little friend." She said, the girl hiding her face in her stuffed kitty.

"Or... you could totally point a gun at the kid. Whatever works. I guess I never have the right answer." I said sarcastically.

"Just a child... What are you doing running around Vigrid? You're certainly not dressed in your Sunday best." She said, the girl looking up at her. She looked back, almost fondly, before having another flashback.

"Bayonetta? Hello?" I asked, shaking her a bit. Nothing. "Okay, kid. Here, you can have this box of cookies and pretend she didn't point a gun at you." I said, giving her a package of double stuff Oreo's, before she ran off.

She left right when Bayonetta snapped out of her daydream. She looked around a little bit, but suddenly, a dragon-headed angel burst through the window behind us, ripping the church from where it was and flying into the sky. It thrashed around as we attacked it, attempting to bite us or hit us with giant fireballs, but we managed to evade the attacks. We were doing quite well until a second head burst through the side, revealing it to be a two-headed angel dragon. We dodged its attacks and looked at each other, nodding. "Be careful, Sai." She said.

"Always." I said, jumping over the edge, flying towards the second head and firing ki blasts at it. Between the two of us attacking both heads, the creature seemed to wanted to withdraw from the fight, the red head somehow swinging in a way to get me back in the church with Bayonetta, before throwing it off its head, higher into the air, before each head shot a fireball that combined into a large one, coming straight towards us. "Got a plan for that?" I asked. I'd be fine, but she wouldn't.

"Hang on!" She said as she grabbed the remains of the church and spun at high speeds in mid-air, flinging it at the fireballs in the last possible second, destroying the church and fireballs, the two of us diving down towards the burning city below.

* * *

 **Zuul: The gatekeeper of Hell, who prevents the dead from escaping and the living from entering... until he eats them and makes them dead. Because of his close proximity to hell compared to other demons, Zuul is the easiest for Sai to summon, requiring little concentration and the only demon that allows Sai to move and fight while the demon is summoned.**


	4. Fire In The Streets

We landed in the middle of town where we encountered Luka, Bayonetta slowing time to stop a bunch of debris from crashing down on us. We then looked up to see the dragon angel we were fighting earlier as it flew lower, just above some buildings, looking at Bayonetta. **_"Are you the one to awaken me from my heavenly slumber, my world of light and summoned me into this world of chaos?"_** He demanded in Enochian, but she merely leaned up against a floating boulder, ignoring the question.

I moved back and forth to see if it was paying any attention to me, only to find that he wasn't. "Well, I've got nothing to do with this. You want me to take the LP's and bring them to Rodin?" I asked, gesturing to the Gates of Hell portal behind us. She indeed handed hers over and I headed down. (Remember, I can't speak or understand Enochian, so I can't understand the angels and wouldn't contribute much to these conversations)

 _ **"The taint of the dark world is upon you, yet you have made a pact with the darkness in exchange for the powers of a witch. It was said such a pitiful creature survived the annihilation. Tell me, my child, what is your name?"**_ He asked.

She chuckled a bit at this, pushing another boulder out of the way with one of her guns. "If I was your child, I'd be an awfully ugly witch, wouldn't I?" She asked. "Yours is a face only a mother could love and one I could never forget... If only I could remember where from." She wondered.

 _ **"Well then, my apologies. If you are not my awakener, then you and I have no quarrel."**_ He said, only for her to respond by kicking the fragment into his upside-down stomach human face, Witch Time ending and all the fragments falling to the ground around her.

"No quarrel? You're in no position to decide that. You see, my infernal partners LOVE my ability to eliminate your kind. I figure your sacrifice would shut them up for a little while." She said, shooting at him, but he flew up high and ascended through a portal back to Paradiso, avoiding the bullets.

Suddenly, the ground began bursting in spits of lava all around her, leaving the town on fire with giant openings in the streets full of lava, angels appearing shortly after, covered in flames as well, making it impossible for Bayonetta to physically attack them. She could only shoot them. An Affinity attempted to attack her, but I rushed in and decapitated it from behind with a silver white katana with a red streak along the blade. "I'm gone for like two minutes and things get this bad?" I asked, tossing her the katana.

She caught it and smirked. "I'm sure this would've happened even faster with you around. So, what souvenir did you get from Rodin this time, little one?" She asked.

I smirked before pulling out a pair of steel fans with blades that looked like they were made from metallic black peacock feathers with red eyes spots common on said feathers. I crossed my arms in front of me, then swung them outwards, creating a huge gust of wind that blew out the fire on the angels, allowing me to rush in and slice two of them in half. "Oh, it came with a cologne, too: _Utsukushī arashi_." I said, spraying it on (translation: beautiful windstorm). Suddenly, my trench coat became adorned with hundreds of feathers just like the ones that made my fans. I looked towards an angel and once again crossed my arms while spinning towards him, disorienting him with the patterns of the feathers, before stopping in front of him and cross slashing his chest, the guts of wind blowing him away in 4 different pieces, at which point I stopped and posed in a crane stance, right fan out in front with the left one held at the ready.

 **Kamaitachi: An evil god is said to release wind yokai to cut unsuspecting humans with their sickle-like nails while riding dust demons through the winds they create. But karma finally caught up to one of these demons... and so did Rodin, who received a deep slash on the leg by one of these demons and took revenge by turning the demon into these very fans, which draw from the demon's power to create winds strong enough to rip the skin off of anything unfortunate enough to be in their path.**

"Impressive. Rodin certainly put quality work into these weapons." Bayonetta said, rushing through and slicing several angels in half, before striking at another and filling it with holes from where she stabbed it. With these two new weapons, we easily and masterfully laid waste to the remaining angels and Bayonetta destroyed the barrier, allowing us to continue onward.

We proceeded through the pathway into the street where the street car almost ran us over, proceeding down and preparing to fight a couple of Beloveds in our way, but suddenly, we heard a massive breaking noise and turned around to see the once blocked-off road behind us had been broken outward by a tidal wave of lava behind us. "Yeah, that's worse than a street car!" I said, the two of us hurrying to outpace the lava wave while the Beloveds were too stupid trying to grab and kill us instead of escape the tidal wave and were instead engulfed by it as we eventually jumped to safety. We reached the middle of the next square, only for a Fairness to jump out of a portal on the ground, on fire, shooting a fireball at us. We dove out of the way and looked at each other "Second verse, same as the first?" I asked.

"Sounds like a plan." She said. I let out another powerful swing from my fans, creating category 1 hurricane winds to easily put out the flames on the angel, allowing Bayonetta to rush in, landing a few quick slashes to stun the beastly angel, before pulling back and drawing power for one more devastating slash that cleaved it in half. And speaking of halves, a half of two different records appeared.

"Aww, what the hell?! Who broke the record in half? Have you ever played a half a record? Whatever plays is half shitty." I said.

"Come now, Sai. I'm sure we'll be lucky enough to find the other halves. Things do seem to happen in our favor." She said, destroying the next barrier and continuing onward.

"Just as often as things go horribly wrong for us." I added before following her. We hurried back through the next part of town and the door that was previously sealed behind the statue of the sage and witch burst open, with a spurt of lava repeatedly bursting upwards. "There's no way you can get through like that." I said worriedly.

"Well, lucky there are some statues around." She said, lifting them and making a lightning bolt come down for her to dodge. We now had a brief opening where there was no lava so we could jump through, which we did. We landed safely on the other side where a trio of angels tried to stop us, but then that tidal wave of lava burst through behind us, forcing the angels to flee. But Bayonetta suddenly got an idea and each of us jumped on one of the angel's backs to safely surf on it. "Dancing a go-go, baby!" She called out as we launched ourselves into the air.

"Mahalo, mothafuckas!" I cheered as well. We landed on a nearby wall above the lava and started to make our way towards a path to get us to the other side of the road. But before we even took 3 steps, 3 angels appeared in front of us. Bayonetta quickly sliced through the first two while I beat down the last one and sent him into the lava below with another small burst of wind. With that, we made our way across the make-shift bridge to the other side and made it to another path crossing us back over to the other side. We prepared to jump across a small gap in the buildings before the building we would've jumped to exploded, making the gap larger, but still easy enough for us to clear, which we did. "So much for the angels not wanting to interfere with the human world." I said.

"Yes, for being god's messengers, they certainly are devilishly mischievous." She said. Another building in front of us exploded and before we jumped, we looked back to see the tidal wave of lava renewed and bigger than ever, making its way towards us. "Hurry now, little one. I have a hot ass, but I certainly don't want it THAT hot." She said, jumping across the gap and hurrying for a very tall tower to reach higher ground.

"I know, I certainly see it often enough." I said, following her. (And no, that is not a dirty or sexual joke. A: Bayonetta usually leads the group, so Sai stays behind her where he gets a good view. B: her clothes come off or get much skimpier almost all the time in the game for her attacks, so it's hard not to see it)

We reached the tower and got to the top floor before it suddenly broke off, heading for a dive into the lava. Fortunately, with only a second to spare, we jumped onto a nearby street, landing safely out of the lava and jumping further away to avoid the splash from when the tower hit the lava. We reached the next open area of town, before stopping as two more Fairness jumped out of portals in front of the fountain. "Ugh. More of these guys?" I said, annoyed, putting them out and nearly sending them flying with category 2 winds from the fans.

"You have to give them credit for persistence." She said, heading towards the one on the left, leaving me to deal with the one on the right. She made a wicked weave pick up a nearby car and fling it at her Fairness, stunning it and allowing her to rush in, land a harsh combo of slashes, changing into a devastating barrage of stabs, creating a wicked kick to crash down on the beast, then charged up the sword and sliced it in half. Meanwhile, mine lunged at me, but I knocked its head aside with a parry from my left fan, then slashed its neck with my right fan, staggering it a bit and allowing me to land a few jabs to its left side with both fans, swinging them upward to create a small tornado and launch the Fairness into the air, struggling to control itself until I dived down on it and slashed it in half, landing in a kneeling position with the fans out to my sides as the tornado subsided and the two halves of the angels crashed to the ground before vanishing.

"They're big and fast, but I've fought bigger and faster." I said.

"Indeed. It is getting a bit too easy. All the more reason to give that dragon a good thrashing." She said, the two of us starting to walk off, before the ground began exploding, sending two street cars flying, one getting trapped in an archway while the other went flying. We jumped to a small rotunda, before rushing and jumping across several pieces of debris and jumping into the train car, which began to fall from its place.

"Shit! That's our only way out! And it's blocked by lava!" I said.

"Not for long!" Bayonetta said, rushing ahead, jumping and spinning in the air while firing her guns at the lava wall in front of her. This put a hole in the wall of lava and allowed us to jump through into the cave the arch led to just before the car fell and a waterfall of lava cascaded down to block the path, preventing us from going back. "It looks like we won't be going that way again." She said, walking deeper into the cave.

"Yeah. We better hurry, though. We maybe have 10 minutes before the lava reaches this place and floods it, too." I said, following her. We dispatched another trio of angels and navigated our way around more lava pits to reach a giant open area in the cave. "Whoa... This place is huge. And luckily, it looks like its got a path leading out of here." I said, gesturing to a bridge a small distance away. We made our way over to it, but just as we started to cross, a pair of giant stone pillars broke and fell on the bridge, destroying it. "Shit! Now what?!" I asked.

"Now, we have company." Bayonetta said as 3 more angels appeared and attacked us.

"Threes again? They should know by now that doesn't work." I said, landing between two of them and spinning with my fans out, decapitating them while Bayonetta dash-slashed the next one, killing it instantly. Suddenly, a strange portal beside us, which previously had nothing in it, suddenly opened, revealing a lovely world behind it. But something about that lovely world felt very wrong to me. "Is that?" I asked.

"A portal to Paradiso, yes. There, we might find something to get out of our little predicament. Although, for you, it will be quite... uncomfortable." She said.

"Well, neither was nearly being obliterated by a Demon God. This can't be... TOO bad..." I said unsurely. This place was only close to Paradiso, but it made my skin crawl and made me feel uncomfortable. So the real thing could only be worse. We headed through and it immediately felt like a billion tiny needles were poking me all over my body. Not enough to hurt, but I certainly didn't like it. "Let's find what we need to fast. I don't like it here." I said.

"Very well. You look around down here and I shall search the higher ground." She said.

"You got it." I said, taking off and looking all around the area while she used the statues and witch time to slow water spouts to the point of being solid platforms allowing her to reach the higher ground. I followed the rocky paths and found two different platforms above the water, each with half a record on it. When I approached either record half, it flew to me like a magnet and joined with its respective half we already had. "That was lucky." I said, before flying back to join Bayonetta as she pulled a lever that made a wall holding an hourglass shatter. "I'm guessing this is important." I said, touching the hourglass. This made it float into the air and shatter, warping space and time, fixing the wall and putting it back where it was before.

"Hm... I wonder if this works in other worlds." Bayonetta said, pulling the lever and shattering the wall, attaching the hourglass to her back and heading back to the portal.

"Well, before we test that out, we should head to Rodin to get the new weapons from these first." I said.

"A little extra firepower never hurt anyone." She agreed, the two of us heading into a nearby portal to the Gates of Hell.

We entered the bar and walked up to Rodin, handing him the records we had. "Damn, two more LP's? Working me down to the bone. It's alright. I was bored, anyway." He said, playing them and heading down to Inferno. Shortly after, he reappeared, once again beaten and bloody, but victorious. "Damn. Those bastards were a handful. Even you two might have trouble controlling them. Here ya go." He said, handing Bayonetta a cobra-headed whip while he handed me a pair of long kamas, although they were big enough to be more like single-handed scythes than the smaller sickle weapon. The handle and shaft of the weapons were like red and black spines, heading up into the skulls of roaring beasts' mouths with a ball of darkness floating in the monsters' mouths while the menacing blades came from the backs of the monsters' heads, as well as two spear-like points coming from the tops of the monsters' heads.

 **Ryuk: A foolish and mischievous shinigami who created chaos in the human world by giving a book of death to a human teenager, leading to hundreds of deaths of both good and evil humans. This caused chaos through the human world to Purgatorio and Paradiso alike. Rodin took it upon himself to punish the demon and sealed him into these weapons. Even if not fatally wounded, those who have been cut by these blades as many times as they have letters in their name shall find themselves joining those with their names written in the Death Note.  
**

"Awesome. Now it will be more fun next time Mom and I go demon hunting, since both of us have scythes now." I said, admiring them.

"And I should have no trouble punishing those naughty angels now." Bayonetta said, cracking the whip.

"Happy to be of service." Rodin said as we headed for the portal and returned to the cave.

From there, we headed towards the broken bridge and Bayonetta activated the hourglass, restoring the pillars and the bridge alike. "Alright! Now, let's hurry." I said, the two of us quickly heading across, before we ran into angels about halfway, mostly the small flying heads, but there were a pair of Applauds much farther behind.

"Now it's time you really teach you angels some discipline." Bayonetta said, cracking her whip once again before swinging it in front of her in a crossing motion, easily knocking a few of the heads out of the air and into the lava below, simply destroying a few more and grabbing the last small one and throwing it into the larger head of the leader, killing both. She prepared to face the Applauds, but two beams of darkness flew past her and put holes in the angel's chests, killing them instantly.

She looked back in surprise to see me holding the scythes with the blades facing back towards me with the monster mouths pointed towards where the angels have been. "Oh, I am gonna have some fun with these." I said with a smirk. She giggled as well before the two of us continued onto another bridge, but just like the first one, it began to crumble. "Oh, shit! Run!" I said, the two of us hurrying ahead, repeatedly jumping from breaking and falling pieces of the bridge onto the next one, attempting to reach the pillar it connected to, but before we could reach the end, it broke off as well, forcing us to jump onto another narrow pathway down below, surrounded by lava. "Man, I'm glad this path was here. I didn't see it when we first jumped." I said.

"Yes, we do seem to have Lady Luck on our side." She agreed as we headed down the path, doing our best to dodge LAVA DRAGONS bursting from the lava and trying to land on and crush us. We finally made it into the cave ahead and the moon shined down, allowing Bayonetta to run up the wall. From there, we ran as fast as we could up the wall to the opening above us, doing our best to avoid the falling rocks, having to slice through them or in my case even blast them with ki blasts to clear the way, but we managed to reach the top and get to safety just before lava completely flooded the catacombs below and the moon went back behind the clouds, robbing Bayonetta of the ability once again. "My... even for us that was cutting it a bit close." She said, although she wasn't particularly worried.

"Yeah. I'm just happy to be in one piece... Sort of..." I said, looking down at my left foot, which had almost been completely melted to the bone by the lava. "Meh. It'll heal." I said with a shrug.


	5. Bad Blood

Bayonetta and I hurried into the coliseum where the angel appeared to be speaking to someone in the sky. _**"You are most understood. Our fate is tied to the demon world and we share your earnest interests in this matter."**_ It spoke, before Bayonetta shot it.

"You again? And here I thought I'd seen the last of you." She said, before the dragon head with the red gem turned and growled at her.

 _ **"It is most kind of you to alleviate my need to search you out, Bayonetta. Please forgive my prior trespass and lack of hospitality."**_ It said, floating higher.

"I'm sure you'll be more than hospitable to me this time around." She said.

"Hospitable? Is that what you call flooding an entire town with lava?" I asked, even though I knew I wouldn't understand the answer.

"Oh, please! Those sheep believe dropping like flies will bring forth the resurrection of their god. They're HAPPY to die for us." A voice rang out. Suddenly, a girl dropped down on the angel's back in a 3-point landing, before jump-flipping off of it to land a few feet in front of me. She wore a sleeveless black leather leotard with two spikes on each shoulders, long leather gloves that came halfway up her upper arms with Wolverine-like claws on the backs of the hand and thigh-high leather Shinobi tabi boots that also had blades on them, two per foot. She had jet black hair in a long ponytail that went past her waist and a ponytail that covered her one of her icy blue, pupil-less eyes, which had black tattoos that streaked down past them from the top of her head to the bottom of it, as well as a dark circle in the center of her head.

"Tsukasa!" I snapped.

"A friend of yours?" Bayonetta asked.

"Unfortunately, we're family. That asshole who attacked me while you were having your little flashback was my uncle. This is one of his daughters. She's also on board with the enslave humans thing." I explained.

"Yep. And it's way easier with the angels on our side." She agreed.

"What? How?! The angels are supposed to hate all demons!" I said, looking up at Fortitudo.

He ignored me, however, focusing on Bayonetta. _"I_ _ **have been informed that a survivor of the witch hunts is resisting our dominion. However, her inevitable reunion with Hell makes her a sad soul."**_ He said as he flew down. _**"If you are this pitiful being, then shall I release you from your torment?"**_ He asked, before Bayonetta shot him again.

"I'm sorry. I forgot to mention one of the other reasons I hunt your kind. Your far too ugly NOT to put out of your misery." She said.

The angel simply laughed at this. _**"Challenging us with a demon and the Dark Arts?! No matter the age, witches never learn."**_ He laughed as he flew up higher, readying himself for a fight, before Bayonetta shot him a few more times.

"Flock off, feather-face!" She snapped.

"Sounds like something Dante would say..." I said.

"Sai, dear, why don't you handle your little bad blood with your cousin. I have my own with this angel." She said.

"Good. If I can't get the answers from the angel, I'll just beat them out of her!" I said, rushing at her as she pulled out a long katana with a deep curve in the blade, the two of us locking blades and jumping off to the sidelines as Bayonetta attacked the angel.

 **Background Music: "Bad Blood" by Taylor Swift (it works perfect for both sides)**

Tsukasa and I landed on the farthest ring of the Colosseum while Bayonetta fought the angel standing on a lower ring... It's hard to explain, I don't know what every part of a Colosseum is called, let's just stick with the fact two different fights are happening in two different places. I trapped her blade between the blades of my fan and attempted to slice her stomach, but she jumped back. "Why would the angels ally with any demons, let alone you?!" I demanded.

"Simple: we both have something the other wants and for now, we're putting up with each other until we have what we want: First, that witch..." She started.

"What do you want with-?" I started, before she rushed in and forced me to guard, struggling to hold her back.

"Second: The Blades dead and the humans kneeling before us!" She snapped, kicking me back.

I drew Ryuk and stabbed the blades into the ground, skidding myself to a stop. "That's not gonna happen." I said, before launching myself forward, spinning and holding the kamas outward as I spun, hitting hard against her defenses and opening them up, allowing me to land a couple of slices on her chest, before knocking her back with a headbutt.

"Argh! Damn you!" She snapped, rushing in, at such a speed it created after images that moved beside her, making it look like there were 3 of them coming at me, all preparing to strike at once, but I knew how to avoid this.

"Time was frozen today!" I shouted, activating Bullet Time, freezing her and her clones as their blades almost reached me, jumping over them and restarting time, causing her and her clones to miss and slash each other, destroying the clones and leaving a deep cross slash on her face. In this time, I had equipped Ryuk to my legs and readied Kamaitachi in my hands, jumping and doing 3 backflips, deploying the kamas on the last one, hitting her chest and slashing upwards from there, staggering her back, before I swung the fans with enough force to create category 5 winds, sending her flying back into a pillar that crashed down on her. "You think you can take down the Blades like this? Not with how weak you are now." I told her.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta fought against the dragon, dodging its attacks and hitting it hard with Wicked Weaves at a distance and landing devastating slashes with Shuraba when it got close enough. She managed to stun him, making him fall to the ground. She jumped down and hit him with a powerful axe kick, hitting him multiple times as she descended and finishing with a powerful Wicked Kick when she hit the ground, before grabbing the dragon head with the red gem in it and flipping him over her shoulder. He recovered after this, rolling onto his side and to his feet, attempting to bite her with both dragon heads, but she dodged, activating Witch Time as he got the mouths of each head stuck in the ground, allowing her to land several powerful hits. Eventually, though, he released a powerful blast of angelic energy, tearing up the ground and forcing Bayonetta to jump to a small island as a small sea of lava rose up, the angel taking to the air and landing on the ledge Bayonetta previously fought on. "What's the matter, darling? Too scared to fight one little witch?" She taunted.

 _ **"Enough. This fight is over. Now you die!"**_ He roared, breathing a stream of lava from the dragon mouths, causing an explosion that tore up much of the ground, shooting up several large boulders, the arena below now a full sea of lava. However, Bayonetta used Witch Time at just the right moment, freezing the boulders in place and using them to make a path to Fortitudo while he was vulnerable. She launched herself at him with a Flying Kick to the upside down human face, then ran up its stomach, jumped up and grabbed the dragon head with the blue crystal, pulling him down and throwing him to the ground.

"Sai!" She called.

I kicked Tsukasa back as I heard my name and turned to see Bayonetta and Fortitudo plummeting to the lava-covered arena below. "Bayonetta!" I called, swinging my fans with as much force as I could, managing to clear most of the lava from the center of the arena just before Bayonetta landed and smashed him to the ground, before flinging him over her shoulder two more times and managing to rip off the head, creating a portal to Inferno an army of demonic hands to pull it down.

Tsukasa laughed a bit as I turned back to her. "It's funny you mentioned how weak we are now. Why do you think we teamed up with the angels in the first place. I'll spare you the boring details, but what we wanted from the angels wasn't any weapon or material item." She said, raising her right hand, the claws of which where dripping with blood. But she hadn't used them on me. Looking back to Fortitudo with my enhanced demon vision, I noticed small, almost unnoticeable gashes in his back and pieced it together: she spiked him with those when she did her 3-point landing on his back. "It's their blood. You know this stuff: the union of demon and angel blood will create beings with power neither race could hope to match." She said.

"Also makes for a shitty video game." I said, referencing the DmC reboot. "But more than likely, it'll kill you before it makes you some all-powerful being!" I warned her, since usually when demon blood touches me or gets inside me through cuts or my mouth, it either burns or makes me feel sick.

"Well, let's just see then." She said, licking the blood from her claws. She gasped as she struggled to breathe, starting to choke, before falling onto her back and screaming, briefly entering her Devil Trigger, which basically looks like a black werewolf with spikes, bat wings and red veins, before she began to change, growing to 3 times her original size (5'5"), patches of white and gold appearing in the red and black, a set of powerful mandibles erupting from the sides of her head behind her mouth, two sets of arms exploding from her body, one below her arms and one from her shoulders, looking like that of a white praying mantis with scythe-like blades. Her tail also turned into a spiky version of the creatures abdomen, as well as two pinchers at the end. She turned in a way to aim the abdomen at me, attempting to snap me in the pincers, but I jumped back. But then, a light appeared at the end of the pincers and each one fired a beam at me, which I barely managed to deflect with my fans. She then laughed at this. _**"You fool! Did you really think I'd do something like that without knowing what it'd do to me?!"**_ She demanded.

"I can honestly say yes to that." I confirmed a bit awkwardly.

 _ **"We've been researching this for months now! Testing our blood against theirs time and again! And we found out it mutates our blood and genetic code, making us even stronger! It could be harmful, but we worked to ensure that we'd survive the process! And now look at me! I was always bigger and stronger than you, but now I'm big AND strong enough to crush you like the bug you are!"**_ She snapped, lunging at me, swinging her scythe arms at me.

"Says the one with insect mouth parts!" I said, kicking at one of the scythes, catching it with my own as she swung the other. I jump spun and caught it as well, defending myself from both of those arms, but now I was wide open, held in the air between her blades. "Oh, shit!" I said as she swung her other set of blades down on me and swung her claws, but I breathed a stream of fire in her face, forcing her back.

 _ **"How dare you!? I am above you! I'm above the angels! I'm above everything!"**_ She screamed, breathing a swarm of both angelic and demonic locusts at me.

"Apparently, you're not above common sense or Pokemon logic: Fire beats Bugs." I said, lighting myself of fire and crossing my arms as all the locusts fried as soon as they got close to me.

 _ **"Then get ready for two of my favorite moves!" She said, suddenly disappearing and reappearing right in front of me. "Crunch!"**_ She announced, lunging and grabbing my head in her teeth, chomping viciously and repeatedly. _ **"And Bug Bite!"**_ She added as the insect mouth parts chomped on the sides of my neck.

"Neither- of those- are as good- as..." I started, forced to stop occasionally when the mouth parts chomped on my neck. "Flamethrower!" I announced, breathing fire down her throat and forcing her to release me again to deal with the flames.

While this was happening, Bayonetta was still fighting with Fortitudo, evading his attacks and even using Witch Time to dodge one fireball, then knock the next one back immediately after, as well as of course landing some additional hits. She once again managed to bring him to the ground and grabbed the remaining dragon head, flinging him over her shoulder and slamming him to the ground, landing a few more hits afterwards, but this time she was too cocky and stuck around for too long after her recovered, allowing him to chomp down on her, attempting to crush her in his massive jaws. I heard her shout in pain when he first grabbed her and turned to see her struggling to keep his jaws from clamping down. "Bayonetta!" I said, grabbing Tsukasa as she was still recovering, spun and threw her at Fortitudo, hitting him in the neck just behind the head of the dragon, causing him to roar in pain and release Bayonetta, allowing her to land an extra backflip kick to his head, taking him to the ground again.

"And to think I once thought he'd only be a nuisance." She said, smiling at me, before turning her attention back to Fortitudo and landing several punishing hits with her whip, before she wrapped it around Tsukasa, using her for extra weight and slamming her into Fortitudo and flinging her back to me, where I hit her with a powerful upward slash from both kamas.

"Only a nuisance to the enemies!" I countered, using Instant Transmission to get above Tsukasa and kick her back down.

"Damn his demon hearing." Bayonetta cursed, before turning back to Fortitudo, laying several powerful hits on him, before bringing him down for the final time, throwing him over her shoulder a few more times and ripping off the other dragon's head, creating a portal to drag it down to Inferno as well. Fortitudo quickly got back to his feet in rage at this and let out a powerful shout, creating an explosion of lava below the Colosseum, launching it sky high. Bayonetta, Tsukasa and I staggered at this as the Colosseum began to break and crumble. The piece Tsukasa and I were on flew quite a ways from the rest of it while Bayonetta tried to figure a way out of this. The situation had grown perilous and if she wasn't careful, she might not get out of it alive. She used Witch Time and noticed her lollipop several stories below her.

Masterfully parkouring, she manuevered her way down to it and retrieved it, before turning her focus back to Fortitudo. He repeatedly rushed the large portion of Colosseum wall she clung to, repeatedly running it through with his tail in an attempt to stab her, but she dodged every attack and landed several of her own for each of his failed attempts. She continued her onslaught against the angel, breaking huge chunks from his stone-like face until he made one final desperate attack, swinging his tail at her with all the force he could muster. This completely backfired, however, when she grabbed his tail and flung him far off into the distance. "A GRAA ORS (The moon of Darkness)" She chanted, summoning Malphas, a massive crow demon. The demon then pinned Fortitudo to a piece of debris and began to peck at its victim mercilessly with increasing speed, rearing its head back and letting out a mighty screech, before smashing completely through the angel's body and the wall behind it, disappearing back to Inferno. All the while, Bayonetta had jumped onto a piece of debris and steered it into several other pieces, directing them all at whatever remained of Fortitudo before jumping off and deactivating Witch Time, sending all of the pieces flying at him at full speed, doing even more devastating damage.

"You know, you're not nearly so ugly when you're screaming." She told him.

 _ **"It was as foretold... Your power... Incredible..."**_ He said weakly.

"Foretold!? Explain yourself!" Bayonetta demanded.

 _ **"I, Fortitudo, am but a simple sacrifice for the resurrection of the Creator. May the Creator, Jubileus grace you on your journey."**_ He said before a portal to Inferno opened up and the army of demonic hands dragged him in, kicking and screaming.

She stood there, unsure of what to make of what the angel had told her, before throwing away her finished lollipop stick and jumping off her piece of debris, diving to an unknown location below. **(My dear, sweet child... Fear not, for I am watching over you... Continue on your path.)** The voice from before rang through her head.

Back with me, Tsukasa struggled to stand, regaining her breath as I stood there waiting. _**"I cannot be defeated... I will kill you... and help my father reign down a new era over humanity where they bow down to us!"**_ She shouted, rushing in at me.

I closed my eyes and sighed at this. "I had hoped I could reason with you, but you've lost all sense of righteousness... and self control... There is no longer any place left for you in... ZA WARUDO!" I announced, activating Bullet Time, freezing her mere inches away from me. "Let's spell it out." I said, readying Ryuk. "T-S-U-K-A-S-A! B-L-A-D-!" I started, slicing her repeatedly with the blades, each one stealing more and more of her life force. I raised the kama in my right hand once more, before stopping and smirking, jumping into the air and using my ki to fly as the debris we stood on slammed into the ground, breaking apart into hunrdeds of pieces, many of those slamming into her as she hit the ground with deadly force. I landed a decent ways away from her as she still struggled to get up.

 _ **"This isn't... The end..."**_ She started, trying once more to get up.

"Yes it is." I said, doing several hand signals. "Kamereon!" I announced, creating a portal behind me. A giant pair of strange, reptillian legs slowly pulled themselves from the portal, before the upper half of a giant chameleon easily twice the size of Zuul with 5 glowing yellow eyes on either side of its head, bull horns sticking out past the head far enough to impale 10 people and razor sharp black and purple frills like a frill-necked lizard and spikes running down its back followed the legs, the demon narrowing its eyes on Tsukasa.

 _ **"No... Not that... You can't!"**_ She pleaded, trying to escape.

"I can and I will... Not because I want to, but because I have to." I said with some guilt, before the demon behind me opened its mouth and shot out its harpoon-like tongue into her chest, reeling her in and repeatedly chomping down on her until she was in small enough pieces to consume. It let out a triumphant screech before disappearing into its portal. "It's a shame I couldn't help her. It's not her fault she lost her way. But damn if she wasn't committed to the way her father showed her." I said.

 **(Don't weep for the stupid, Sai, you'll be crying all day. Besides, I want you to save those tears for when you're laying at my feet, begging for mercy... and receive none.)** Zeidan's voice rang out in my head.

"The only tears I'll shed for you are joy when I cry laughing after I rip your freakin' head off..." I growled, before using Instant Transmission to return to Bayonetta.

* * *

 **Damascus: A chameleon that dwells in the deepest, most poison-filled swamps of Hell. His eyes see all that enter his domain and his deadly tongue has never once let any prey unfortunate enough to come into its range escape.**


	6. Rain and Wind and Weather! RAWHIDE!

Bayonetta landed in some strange place. "Where the hell am I? I better have got frequent flyer miles for that flight." Bayonetta wondered, before looking around. "And where has that little demon gotten off to? If he doesn't show up soon, I'll leave him behind." She said, jumping as I suddenly appeared beside her.

"No need for that. I'm here and ready to go." I said.

"Even now, you're still full of surprises." Bayonetta said, before we continued on. However, as we headed down the path we were on, several large chunks of it broke away. "Well, that's certainly a way to take the skip out of one's step." She said.

"Thank the gods we can fly and or double jump." I said as we did so. Chunks of the bridge continued to break away or sink a bit, but this only slightly hindered our progress.

Suddenly, a large chunk of the bridge broke away as several of the floating head angels appeared before us. "Ahh, so you think you're safe in the air? You're wrong." Bayonetta said, pulling out her whip, lashing two of them and killing them instantly, before wrapping it around another one and flinging it into another, killing them both, as I threw one of my fans at the last remaining one, easily slicing through it and using a series of gusts from the other fan to bring its counterpart back to me.

We reached the end of the path we were on, reaching a large, open platform with a metal gate blocking a tunnel. We went to it and attempted to try and open it, but an angelic energy barrier prevented us from doing so. It was different than the usual ones, so Bayonetta couldn't blow a kiss and break it. "Okay, so we're not going this way." I said, hissing in pain and annoyance as I touched the barrier, only for it to zap my hand away, leaving a painful stinging feeling for a few moments.

"No, it looks like we'll have to take another crumbling walkway." Bayonetta said, heading towards the path on the side. However, before we could take said path, it was blocked by another angelic barrier and a light shined from above. Behind us, the two pillars, one on either side of the walkway we took to get her, lit up, the right one with fire and the left one with lightning as two clawed angels appeared and jumped down at us.

We jumped back as the angels landed in front of us. "Pause, tho!" I said, activating Bullet Time and rushing at Grace (the fire one). "Even the fiercest of infernos can be extinguished with a strong enough wind!" I announced, blasting it back with category 4 winds from my fans, putting out its flames and sending it flying back into the pillar it jumped down from, then rushing in and break dancing, extending Ryuk from my legs as I did so, slashing the angel 5 times, one for each letter of its name, killing it instantly.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta also rushed in at Glory (the lightning one), landing several slashes from Shuraba and then unleashing a barrage of bullet-filled kicks, followed by a powerful Wicked Kick. Time restarted after this and she immediately chased the poor angel bastard down, activating her torture attack and putting the angel in a massive vice that looked like a pair of demonic hands. The angel tried its best to resist the crushing power the vice was receiving from Bayonetta, but it was in vain as she spun the crank with all her might and crushed him into paste. With that out of the way, she blew a kiss and did manage to destroy the barrier blocking the path we were about to take, a small fraction of two different records appearing in the barrier's place. "Well, they're trying to make us work harder and harder for these records now, aren't they?" She asked.

"Yeah." I said, picking up one of the pieces and inspecting it. "Damn. At best, this record's in 3rds. Have you ever played a 3rd of a record on a record player? Let me tell you, it sounds 2/3rds shitty." I said as we put the pieces away and continued on.

We pushed onward, navigating the crumbling bridge and slaughtering any angel that got in our way. I switched back to my other set of weapons, using the blades on Ghostshade's guards to easily punch holes in the angel's chests, necks and faces while blasting off chunks of their bodies with Last Regrets. Bayonetta also switched back to her other set, blasting away angels with the shotguns on her feet while flailing around her whip and easily taking down angels with single strikes at a time. We made it to another decently-sized platform where we discovered Bayonetta's lipstick sitting right in the middle of it. "Huh? My lipstick." Bayonetta said curiously, reaching down to pick it up.

Not too far away, Luka was ready with a camera. "It's a trap!" I said like sci-fi Admiral.

Luka took several pictures as she picked up the lipstick, but she didn't appear in any pictures, just the lipstick in different places, floating in the air. "Nothing! Damn..." He cursed. Bayonetta then smirked, walking up to him and drawing a bunch of goofy designs on his face, humming a happy tune the whole time while he couldn't see or figure out what was happening until she walked around behind him and exited Purgatorio. "What the-!?" He demanded.

"I've often seen a girl without lipstick, but lipstick without a girl!? Most curious, isn't it Cheshire? What's also most curious is how a child like you has kept afloat in this town." Bayonetta teased.

"The... name... is... Luka!" He snapped.

"We... Do... Not... Care!" I said as I exited Purgatorio as well.

"And don't you think it's a little strange to be worried about my well-being? Sure, the festival of resurrection has peaked security. The thing only happens once every 500 years, can you blame them?" He explained.

"Which is stupid, when you think about it, why bother celebrating something that only happens every 5 lifetimes, you'd think it'd be totally forgotten by now. But, hey, religious nuts, what can you do?" I said, shrugging.

"Besides, when you look as good as I do, security isn't a problem. But a killer like you on the other hand... I'm sure you've found a way." Luka said.

"One of these days you'll learn the truth... and you'll learn you've been a total jackass all this time." I told him.

Bayonetta, however, appeared to be lost in thought. "That little girl... I've seen her somewhere..." She said.

 **(My dear, sweet child... She is the key to your future. To save yourself, you must also save the girl.)** The voice in her head rang out.

Luka was unsure of what to make of all this. "Hey, don't go freaking out on me. We both know you came here for something. But what you don't know is the closer you get, the harder it's gonna be for you to get away from me and what you've done. You'll have to fess up to it all! Ahh... I can't wait for you to get your hands on whatever it is you're after." He said eagerly.

"Said no one to their arch-nemesis EVER." I said.

"Let me guess, you want a cut? Well, if you're still alive by then, perhaps you can appeal to my generosity?" Bayonetta teased.

"Still alive? You may be standing right in front of me, but you're definitely not living in reality. Which is a shame, because the truth is always going to be the truth. All I see when I look at you, the real you, is the truth." He said.

"You can't handle the truth!" I said.

"The truth is you killed my father. I don't care who believes me, they can't reject the truth. The truth will set me free from your black stain on my life. The truth will allow me to expose you to the world. Then I'll have won. And I'll do it without stooping to your level, because I'm not a heartless witch like you." He said.

"If she was heartless, she would've killed you, too, before you had the chance to think of revenge." I told him.

Bayonetta even took a threatening step towards him at this. "Whoa, what are you going to do!? Kill me in plain sight? Go ahead. It would only prove everything I've said about you. Well, that, and sadden the hearts of a number of young ladies. Claire, and Trish, and Silvia, and Ammy..." He listed.

"Why do all of those sound familiar?" I wondered.

"Oh you don't want to piss her off let me tell you. Hell hath no fury!" He laughed at this, before she rushed forward and tackled him, holding her close as he tried to grope her ass. They landed on the ground with Bayonetta on top, pinning him down as I walked past them with a bored expression. He was shocked at this as she traced a hand up the front of her body as he looked on in amazement. "What the...?" He demanded, before she put a hand to his lips, just then there was a massive gust of wind and a huge rock pillar fell, collapsing on and destroying the pathway we had been standing on. Luka was shocked at this, before realizing Bayonetta and I were gone, at least to his eyes, but we were just standing to the side in Purgatorio. He took a few moments to think about this and consider how he thought about Bayonetta, before grappling away.

As he did, an electric version of Fairness, known as Fearless, which shot its axe-like tail out at Bayonetta. She dodged it and shot at it from a distance. I went in and tried to attack, but another one appeared, lunging at me and forcing me to jump back to safety. I rushed in and did a 720 spin (two 360's), leaving the angel from dozens of slashes and cuts from Ghostshade's sword and guard blades, before catching him under the chin with a kick and blasting it with the gun on the foot, spinning and planting my other foot into its chest and firing a round from that gun as well, easily killing it. Meanwhile, after Bayonetta felt like she shot it enough from a distance, she rushed in and mercilessly slashed it with her sword, before activating another torture attack, stabbing it with a massive bladed wheel, charging up her most powerful kick and sending the wheel rolling on the angel's back at high speeds, ripping it to shreds.

With them out of the way, Bayonetta broke the next barrier and we continued on the rest of the short, but still deadly and crumbling path, dealing with a few more angels along the way, Bayonetta killing the two Applauds while I killed one of the Affinities and used its magical tuba to shoot and energy beam and kill the other two. With all threats gone we reached the end of the path, finding a strange iron statue that curved upward into a decent-sized ring, big enough for a person to dive through. "Whoa, what is this?" I asked.

"I don't remember what it is, but for some reason, I know how it works." Bayonetta explained, walking over to a strange device nearby and turning the wheel, moving its gears and changing its picture from day to night. Suddenly, just like how the picture had changed, the world around us changed from day to night.

"Whoa, what the?!" I asked, then noticed that the statue's markings began to glow and inside of the ring had a bit of a glow as well. "That's cool. So now what?" I asked.

"Now we go through." She said, running up the statue, reaching the ring and jumping into it.

"Whoa, wait!" I said, hurrying to the ring and jumping through as well, somehow defying gravity as, instead of falling downward, we fell forward as if the ring were some giant tube or slide we were traveling down, except we could bring ourselves to a stop in order to shoot at the angels flying in our path. We eventually hit a cliff wall and dropped down, encountering another pair of Grace and Glory. This time, Bayonetta and I switched it up, I went after Glory while she took on Grace. She dodged its attacks and used Witch Time as it launched itself into the air to counterattack, landing several powerful attacks, before unleashing a barrage of stabs at the clawed angel, before one more extra powerful slice split the monster vertically in half.

Meanwhile, it was the opposite for me: Glory shot its claws out and tried to bring them down on me. "It's time to stop!" I said, activating Bullet Time after sliding back to avoid the claws. I then rushed in, switching back to and landing several hits to its face with my fans, swinging both of them upwards in a powerful uppercut to knock him back, before I jumped up, extending Ryuk and doing a quadruple front flip, tearing him apart and killing him with the kamas. We thought it was done, but suddenly, a trio of angels that looked like a cross between a stingray, human and dragonfly known as Harmony and flew at us. We managed to dodge them, two of them continuing to fly forward even after they passed us, pulling up before they hit the cliff wall while one of them stopped and fired a number of energy balls at us. "Oh, you wanna do that!? Two can play at this game!" I said, obliterating the angel with Finish Breaker.

The other two came back and flew in at Bayonetta, who dispatched the fist one with ease, slashing it several times, hitting it with an axe kick and finishing it with a Wicked Kick stomping down on it, jumping on the next ones back as it flew at her. "ALCRETE (Fiery)!" She chanted, summoning a huge chainsaw from nowhere.

"AWESOME!" I shouted with stars in my eyes as, despite the angel's best efforts to hold it back, Bayonetta used the chainsaw to cleave through the angel, keeping the chainsaw afterwards.

"If Rodin won't give me a chainsaw, I'll just have to get one myself, now won't I?" She asked.

"Yeah." I agreed as she destroyed the next barrier and we picked up another third of our respective records. We then headed up to some strange castle or tower of sorts, but stopped when the door wouldn't open. "Huh... Well now what?" I asked as Bayonetta walked up.

She gasped in slight surprise when she stepped onto a panel and it sank just a bit. "Hm... It seems this pad activates when pressure is put on it. But it seems like it requires more pressure than simply being stood on." She said, looking up to see a platform above the door. Quickly maneuvering up to it, she walked to the edge and casually jumped off, landing on the platform with incredible force, opening the door. "Let's be on our way, then, shall we?" She said, heading in.

"right behind you." I said, following her. We started to make our way up the stairs, before a bright light shined in and a pair of angels that looked like Applauds in full armor appeared, wielding large scimitars and carrying a pair of shields. "Looks like we have company." I said.

Then we must entertain our guests." She said, the two of us dropping down. I switched to Ghostshade and rushed at one, dodging as it swung its scimitar down on me, then planting my foot on it to trap it. It swung the shield at me, but I used my right blade to block it and pull the shield aside, leaving the angel open for me to slash its stomach with my left blade, then stabbing its torso a few times, finishing up with a powerful kick, sending it flying back into a wall. I then quickly chased it down and spun 4 times, slashing it every time my swords passed by it during the spin, easily killing it. Meanwhile, Bayonetta was dominating the one she fought against with her chainsaw, pushing aside the angel's sword and knocking away its shield, before bringing the chainsaw down on its head and slicing it in half. "What a shame. It appears our guests got tired of our entertainment before we did." She said. Two more record pieces appeared and we both finally had our full records assembled. "Lovely. Now all we need is to pay Rodin a visit." She said. (I know the record piece is a bit later in the level and there isn't a portal there, but by the time you get the weapon, there aren't many more chances to use it)

"Looks like he's expecting us." I said as a portal to the Gates of Hell appeared.

We stepped through and handed the records to Rodin. "I don't know if you two are lucky, or if I'm just unlucky. But either way, I'll whip you up something nice." He said. A few moments later, he returned, bloodied and battered, but triumphant. "Took a little to pound 'em into shape, but the craftsmanship's solid. Now go put these things to good use." He said, handing Bayonetta a set of claws with the power of fire and lightning. Then he handed me a set of weapons that had looked familiar in a way. Long, black skulls that fit over my entire forearms, forming into terrifying mouths full of razor-sharp teeth and 3 tongues that looked like miniature versions of the head. Rodin had turned a pair of Xenomorph's heads into miniguns that fit on my arms. "What do you think? Just right for the season." He said.

 **Doomspore: In his many travels to distant worlds, Rodin found a race of creatures that were nothing less than the ultimate killing machines. A pair of them discovered him and attacked, but this ultimately led to their downfall, becoming Rodin's latest masterpieces. These guns release an endless onslaught of bullets much like the Xenomorph's sword-like tails, filled with their devastating acid blood, capable of melting through even the strongest angels.**

"The perfect treat for me to give the angels some nasty tricks." I said with an evil smirk as I slid them onto my arms.

"A pleasure doing business as always, Rodin." Bayonetta said, equipping the claws and setting them to lightning as we left. We returned to the tower and started to make our way up the sides after the stairs came to an end, only for a small squad of Hamony to emerge and attack us.

"Trick-or-Treat... MOTHERFUCKEEEEEEEEERRRRS!" I screamed as I unloaded from my new arm miniguns to load the angels full of holes which grew bigger as the acid ate through them, even ripping one completely in half. I began to break out in evil laughter at this. (Alucard's laugh at the end of TFS Hellsing Ultimate 4)

"Come on, boys." Bayonetta taunted the angels, laying on her back and spreading her legs. Two of them were furious at this and charged her, but this was their undoing, she jumped and slashed upwards with her claws, slicing one of the angels in half, before punching out with the other claw, catching and stunning the angel, before charging up a huge ball of electricity that exploded and obliterated the angels. "Well, that was fun. Almost had a tickling sensation." Bayonetta said as we continued up the tower. We reached the very top before the moon was hidden behind the clouds, Bayonetta landing on a small platform before the tower somehow sealed itself, preventing us from going back the way we came.

On the wall near Bayonetta was another one of the magic walls. I attacked it and made it break outwards, but it quickly formed back in place. "Great, another fast one. We'll have to find some more statues." I said, looking around.

Bayonetta looked as well and found a few platforms with a lever on the top platform. "Well, what have we here?" She asked, jumping up to it and pulling on it, causing the roof above us to turn, revealing an opening in it for us to jump up to the next level. We did so and found another set of statues with the witch broken, the entrance we came through getting sealed with a barrier and another pair of Grace and Glory appearing. "Let's see how you like a taste of your own medicine!" Bayonetta said, attacking the Glory and easily killing it with a barrage of lighting fast and lightning powered punches, finishing with another charged up ball of electricity.

"I always wondered what happens when fire meets acid. Now I can test it out without hurting myself!" I said, loading up the Grace with bullets, rushing in and landing several powerful punches with the xenomorph mouths biting the angels as I punched, before kicking it onto its back as the acid began to eat through and kill it. "Awesome." I said in admiration of the weapon's abilities.

The statues reformed and Bayonetta worked her magic, dodging the lightning and going down below, breaking the wall and the two of us rushing through before Witch Time ended, continuing on to a strange spiraling pathway. We headed up the long path, doing our best to avoid massive gusts of wind that almost looked like giant snakes made out of compressed swirling winds. We made our way to what I guessed was about halfway up, but in a flash, a massive serpent-like angel smashed through the walkway behind us, causing the whole thing to start to crumble. "Move!" Bayonetta ordered as we both sprinted ahead, trying desperately to stay ahead of the crumbling path behind us. The angel attempted to hinder our progress, but we still managed to reach the end of the path, which turned out to be a giant snake statue, jumping onto the safe platform as the snake statue fell and was shattered by the angel, which, once it stopped in mid-air, we could identify as an Inspired.

"You like breaking stuff, huh?! Well, I like breaking you angels!" I said, shooting at it.

"Bring it down!" Bayonetta shouted.

"On it!" I said, sprouting my wings and flying up after it, engaging in an aerial duel, shooting it in the head several times while dodging its lunges, before flipping hitting him in the head with a double axe kick, unloading on him with Last Regrets, sending him falling to the ground, crashing near Bayonetta, who began to attack him with several vicious slashing and clawing attacks, finishing with a Wicked Weave before it managed to recover.

It spit a fireball at her, but she managed to dodge, activating Witch Time and landing several more powerful hits. Sensing it was taking damage and in danger, the angel flew a good distance away, before attempting to charge in and attack her, so even if she dodged, it could get away before she could retaliate... or so it though, before she simply jumped and landed on its back, casually laying down and summoning a number of Wicked Weaves to beat the living shit out of it, before she personally pile-drove it into the ground, where she prepared to finish it. "A GRAA ORS!" She chanted and did her dance, sending her hair down the portal as the Inspired recovered. But before it could attack her, Malphas dropped down on its back, before grabbing its neck and pulling with incredible force until it ripped the angel's head off, promptly eating it afterwards, before flying off with a triumphant screech.

With the angel gone, I landed beside Bayonetta as she destroyed the barrier and we continued onward. We entered another tower and found the stair case was destroyed in many places, but the moon was still hidden, so Bayonetta couldn't walk on the walls. Fortunately, while the stair case was mostly destroyed, the gaps between the broken parts could be jumped to without much difficulty, allowing us to continue. We then reached a long pathway, guarded by an Inspired, but we brought this one down much easier than the last one, barely slowing us down until we continued down the path. But then, a giant angel even larger than Fortitudo appeared from nowhere and destroyed the path in front of us, forcing us to run along and carefully use Bullet/Witch Time to freeze different pieces of the former path that lined themselves up long enough for us to jump to them, until we saw a large platform we managed to jump to, where we saw Jeanne speaking with the angel that attacked us while Damion stood nearby.

"What is the meaning of this? This is now not once, but twice. Explain this meddling in our affairs!" The angel demanded.

"The only ones meddling are your hapless minions. This will be taken care of in the manner I see fit. Your assistance is not required." Jeanne snapped at it, aiming her guns at it in a threat.

"Those guys must love hearing themselves talk." Damion said.

"Then you have something in common." I called out.

He raised an eyebrow at this. "Bold words. Can you back them up?" He asked, taking a fighting stance and revealing his new weapons, Predator-like wrist gauntlets with blades coming out and laser cannons above them. "Say hello to Heartseeker." He introduced the weapons as Jaune jumped down and landed beside him.

"I suppose coming here has given you a second wind. Feeling better, Bayonetta?" Jeanne asked from her perch.

"Who are you? And don't you dare say my long lost sister." Bayonetta demanded.

"Sister!?" Jeanne scoffed. "You've quite the active imagination. You and I once fought for the jewel upon the crown of the Umbra throne. And now that you've returned, my sleeping beauty, it is time to finish that fight.

"If it's a fight you want, it's a fight you'll get!" I snapped, before looking at Bayonetta, who seemed to be spacing out. "Bayonetta?" I said worriedly, before jumping back as Damion fired a few lasers at me, stepping between me and Bayonetta as Jeanne moved around behind her.

"Why don't we let them catch up. Whatever this is about is between them and this is between me and you." Damion said, gesturing back and forth.

"No time for daydreaming." Jeanne said, preparing herself as Bayonetta snapped back to reality.

 **Background Music: "One For The Money" by Escape The Fate  
**

She turned around in shock to see Jeanne behind her, but then dodged her bullet and engaged in a lightning fast exchange of punches and kicks that Jeanne matched move for move, both of them unleashing a flurry of bullets with every strike. Eventually, Bayonetta managed to find and opening and kicked Jeanne back, chasing after her and the two of them continuing their fierce battle until they wound up with the barrels of their guns right up to each other, firing and disarming themselves of that gun. Jeanne attempted to shoot her with the gun in her other hand, but Bayonetta kicked it aside, attempting to kick at Jaune, who twisted to the side, both of them ending up in a handstand and continuing to fire at each other. Jeanne managed to jump into the air to avoid a few of Bayonetta's bullets, landing back in front of her and the two kicking each other back, retrieving their missing guns and aiming at each other.

Meanwhile, Damion rushed in at me, crossing his blades to block my bullets until he got in close enough, slashing at me while I got on the defensive, blocking his attacks before looking for an opening. I swung my right arm at him, but he blocked it and held it back, doing the same as I swung my left arm at him, his arms now on the inside while mine were on the outside, leaving me completely open for him to stab me in the chest with both sets of blades, lifting me into the air and aiming the barrels of the laser guns in my face, releasing the laser blasts and sending me flying back into the railing. I ran to the side, firing at him as he tried to balance deflecting my bullets and firing his plasma blasts at me. "Okay... Time fore a new plan." I said.

Switching up tactics, I fired at the ground between Damion and I, as well as near his feet, the acid from the bullets hitting flying around, managing to hit his feet and legs, distracting him as the debris from the torn up floor went into the air, at which point I activated Bullet Time, freezing them in the air and rushing in. Damion could resist the bullet time, but with so much debris in the air, it became hard to spot me. "Damn! Where'd he go?!" He demanded, before I came in from his left and through a devastating right uppercut to his jaw, the Xenomorph mouth also taking a vicious bite, before I slammed the other one into his stomach, loading it up with bullets, before tossing him into the air and knocking him back with a powerful fireball from my mouth. He skidded to a stop on his hands and knees, struggling to deal with the burning from the fire and acid, which took their toll on him despite the powerful winds and rain weakening them. "It's over, Damion. You're burnt like a college kid after finals. Just give up. There's still a chance for us to work this out." I said.

He growled at this, before getting back up. "You know, at first, I was just doing what your uncle and the old sage wanted, but now, I just want to shut you the hell up!" He snapped, rushing in.

"Sage?" I asked curiously, before snapping back to reality and blocking his attacks, deflecting his arm as he swung his claw at me, firing a powerful charged plasma shot as he did so, which flew towards Bayonetta and Jeanne.

It hit the mountain they were standing on as they were in a standoff, breaking it perfectly in between the, forcing them to jump back to the safety of the platform Bayonetta and I were still fighting on. "Those cretins fouled it all up again! But perhaps this can be to my advantage." Jeanne snapped at first, but then considered her options, chasing after Bayonetta and jumping back on the platform with her.

All of us now back on the platform, standing side by side with our respective partner, across from our respective opponent, we re-engaged. I shot at Damion and Jeanne, forcing them to evade my attacks. Rushing in while keeping an eye for where my bullets were going, Bayonetta used the opening from when they dodged to attack, jumping towards Damion and kicking him aside, launching herself off him and towards Jeanne, she landed several devastating slashes from Shuraba on her fellow witch, before switching to Durga, punching her and blasting her back with a lightning ball.

I rushed in at Damion after Bayonetta knocked him down, switching to Ghostshade and attacking, the two of us matching each other move for move until we locked blades. He tried to aim the plasmacasters at me again, but I pushed his hands upward, making him miss and allowing me to kick him back. I switched back to Doomspore and unloaded on him again, but he suddenly vanished with a yellow flash of his eyes. "Dammit!" I cursed, looking around for him, before noticing a splash in the water beside me. "There!" I said, spinning and throwing a low kick, hitting Damion in the shin and staggering him back, before I fired a few rounds into his chest, knocking him back again, but he managed to fire a blast from each plasmacaster into my chest before he smashed into the railing, knocking me back into the railing on the opposite side as well.

Some boulders in the wind flew and smashed into the cliff holding our platform, sending it flying in the wind. Damion and I stayed on and continued fighting on the arena while Bayonetta and Jeanne jumped to one of the boulders. Bayonetta dodged or blocked several of Jeanne's attacks before the silver-haired witch kicked her back and summoned a pair of Wicked Fists, so Bayonetta responded in kind, the dozens of silver and black summoned fists fighting for supremacy while if you listened close enough, you could hear the voices of two female demons screaming "ORA!" and "MUDA!", before Bayonetta eventually triumphed and knocked Jeanne back.

The boulder they were on crashed into a lower part of the mountain the arena was on, the two of them jumping off and making their way back to the arena where Damion and I were still fighting, Damion landing a few painful slashes on me before I blasted him back with dropkick combined with a barrage of fire from Last Regrets. I switched back to Ghostshade once again and locked blades with Damion once more as Bayonetta and Jeanne re-engaged each other, Jeanne deflecting a charging slash from Bayonetta and jumping back, but Bayonetta recovered faster than she did from her backflip rushing in and slicing away. Jeanne managed to backflip and dodge once, but once she landed, Bayonetta caught her and landed several painful blows, but managed to jump away again as Bayonetta tried to throw a couple of spinning sweep kicks, kicking her into the air and catching her with several more kicks as she did a series of high-speed backflips, finishing with an axe kick taking Bayonetta to the ground.

She got back up as Jeanne landed, dodging a few of her attacks before she attempted once more to hit Bayonetta with her Wicked Fists, but Bayonetta countered with her own, the two unleashing a flurry of punches that would only meet with the other's fist. This time, however, Jeanne broke through Bayonetta's defenses and prepared to decimate her with a final Wicked Fist. "Bayonetta!" I called, dodging a stab from Damion, kneeing him in the stomach and grabbing his arm, spinning and throwing him into Jeanne, taking her off-balance and forcing the punch to miss, at which point Bayonetta used the opportunity to knock both of them back at once with a Wicked Kick.

 **End Music**

We knocked Damion and Jeanne back, each of them dropping to one knee while we landed on both feet, perfectly fine. "You haven't won... Not yet..." Damion said.

"Looks like it from where I'm standing." I said.

"What's the matter sweetie? Afraid of something, are you!?" Jeanne demanded.

"Afraid? Me?" Bayonetta asked.

"This is a waste of my time. You're still not ready." Jeanne said, before the platform we were on crashed into a cliff, shattering. This forced Damion to jump and fly away while Jeanne was forced to transform into a red lynx, running at incredible speeds to traverse the flying rubble. It seemed for a moment she'd get hit when a boulder flew right at her, but she dispersed into a swarm of moths to avoid this and reformed into an owl, flying away after Damion.

Bayonetta and I were in shock at this. "No way... Can you do that?" I asked.

"We're about to find out." She said, rushing forward as I sprouted my wings and took off. She did a couple of front flips as she tried to master the technique, before finally managing to become a sleek black panther, running at the same high speeds Jeanne had just displayed, traversing the large gaps between boulders and jumped to one more boulder out of the danger zone, but another boulder flew at her, threatening to hit her.

"Bayonetta!" I called out in warning, preparing to fire a ki blast, but it wouldn't get there in time.

She turned her head to look at the boulder flying at her, becoming a swarm of bats to dodge it, then reforming, only to find she was off course of her desired platform. Quickly, she turned herself into a raven and flew to the platform, landing safely on it, before returning to human form. "Oh my... That was bloody amazing." Bayonetta said in astonishment, looking at her hands, before transforming into a panther again and jumping into the distance.


	7. And Now We Have a Kid! For Reasons!

Bayonetta and I dropped down into a large park or something. "Man, you were talking about frequent flyer miles before." I said.

"I may have gotten a bit carried away, but I just got quite the rush from transforming." She said.

"Yeah, I can understand that. Transformations were my bread and butter for a while." I agreed, before sensing something. "Something tells me we'll find something good in there." I said, looking at another one of the chests behind us, breaking it open and finding a third to two more different records. "Another set of thirds? Why can't we just get the whole record?" I grumbled.

"Come now, Sai. A little scavenger hunt never killed anyone." She said.

"Oh, I'm sure I could prove you wrong, there. With examples from my own family." I said as we continued on. We smashed through an iron gate leading into some castle or something, where we were met with a group of angels, 3 Affinities and an Ardor.

"I'm starting to think they're toying with us, sending us these small fry." Bayonetta said, before rushing in with Shuraba.

"Almost not worth the bullets... ALMOST." I said, firing Doomspore at the first Affinity and the Ardor, who blocked the bullets with its shield, but that was my intention, as the bullets bounced off into the other two Affinities, killing them instantly. The Ardor was caught completely off-guard by this, which left him wide open for Bayonetta to slice him in half.

"Good thinking with the ricochet, little one." She said.

"Yeah. In my family, we learn to ricochet projectiles to hit targets in any direction when we're like 4." I said.

She then inspected the door, the lights on it and the switches on the ground, one of which I happened to be standing on and activating the first light. "It seems like we have to activate these switches quickly before they time out." She said, as the Ardor had been standing on the middle switch, which the light ran out on. So she quickly jumped onto the middle switch and turned into a panther, rushing to the next switch, opening the gate and the two of us hurrying through.

We proceeded through a strange, very small canyon with a large platform in the middle, and the next part of the path we were on on the other side of the canyon from us. "Huh?" Bayonetta said, looking closer.

"What is it?" I asked, looking as well, seeing the figure of a little girl heading down the path. "Someone's a bad parent. Letting their kid run around alone in a place like this." I said.

"Come on. We need to get after her." She said.

"O...kay?" I said, unsure of what the girl had to do with this, but obeying Bayonetta and following her down into the canyon.

We quickly searched the canyon, each picking up another third of a record and heading to the platform in the middle of the canyon. "Another broken witch statue. I shouldn't be surprised by now, but it's always a sad sight seeing them like this. But fixing it shouldn't be a problem." She said. But before she could, a pair of Inspired erupted from the water below and circled the platform, preparing to attack. "I go left, you go right!" She says, running to the left.

"Got it!" I said, jumping to the right.

Bayonetta landed a painful slash on her Inspired, followed by several quick blasts from Onyx Rose, managing to bring it down. She rushed in and got several more slashes before it got back up, at which point she went on the defensive, dodging several of its tail whips, before activating Witch Time as it lunged at her, preparing to bite, at which point she hit it with a powerful axe kick, blasting it down with Onyx Rose. "A GRAA ORS!" She chanted and did her dance, sending her hair down the portal as the Inspired recovered. But before it could attack her, Malphas dropped down on its back, before grabbing its neck and pulling with incredible force until it ripped the angel's head off, promptly eating it afterwards, before flying off with a triumphant screech.

Back with me, I unloaded on my Inspired with an endless barrage of bullets, sending it to the ground, at which point I rushed, landing several powerful punches, the xenomorph mouths taking numerous large bites out of its body at the same time before it recovered. It lunged at me, trying to bite me, but I did a quadruple mid-air backflip with Ryuk attached to my feet, repeatedly slashing at its head and jaw, bringing it down once more as I jumped to a safe distance. "Kamereon!" I announced, creating a portal behind me as it recovered. It got back up in the air, spiraled around in the sky to build up speed and momentum to attack, before rushing at me. However, it now saw the massive form of Damascus standing over me, letting out a screech of fear and making a U-turn, trying to fly away, but the chameleon demon opened its mouth and fired its harpoon-like tongue into the underside of the angel snake's stomach, reeling it in and chomping down on its midsection, gradually consuming the whole thing before roaring and disappearing into the portal.

With that, the angel statue was repaired and we were able to continue on once again. Bayonetta called down the lightning and dodged it, activating Witch Time as the geysers in front of us went off, freezing them in place and allowing us to use them as platforms to continue onward. We continued on, killed a couple more angels in the hallways before coming to another door with the same floor switches as before. Except this time, a section of the roof collapsed on top of a lever activating a bunch of spikes to erupt from the ground. "Well, someone certainly isn't very inviting." Bayonetta said.

"It's like the trial of skill all over again." I groaned in annoyance. Using her panther ability again, Bayonetta masterfully weaved through the spikes, reaching the other side of the room, destroying the debris covering the lever and pulling it, putting an end to the spikes. Then, a group of 4 Affinities led by an Applaud appeared. I did a back handspring and spinning with Ryuk extended, slicing through the Affinities and doing some severe damage to the Applaud, before switching Doomspore with Kamaitachi and swinging the fans, creating a massive gust of wind that launched the angel back into a wall, at which point I appeared in front of the beast and sliced it in half at the waist with Ghostshade. "I was always more of a fan of the trial of power, myself." I said.

"I think we've all heard that tower story more than enough little one." Bayonetta said as we continued along. We continued on, but were stopped at the top of a stairway by another 2 pairs of Grace and Glory. Bayonetta masterfully handled the Glories with ease, dodging their attacks and landing her own slashes with Durga, each one backed by a powerful ball of electricity, exploding and doing massive damage to the angels, easily dispatching them. Meanwhile, I backed the Graces into a corner, waiting for them to use a fire attack, then using Kamaitachi to blow the fire back at them, engulfing them and causing them to panic trying to put the fire out, leaving them open for me to rush in and slash them in half.

With their deaths, Bayonetta undid the seal and we proceeded up the stairs and out the door, leading to a bridge crossing over a sea of strange purple liquid to the next part of the building, where we saw the little girl's figure head into. "There she is." I said, noticing the two Affinities in the middle of the bridge, waiting for us. "This won't take long." I said, the two of us stepping forward. But as we took those steps, the bridge suddenly broke, about a quarter of the structure collapsing, leaving a huge gap in between the two parts of the bridge, the angels falling down into the purple liquid below. "Even faster than I thought." I said, before noticing the angels melting in the purple sea below. "That's probably bad for us, though." I said.

"Indeed. I'd say making that jump is too dangerous even for me... at least in human form." She smirked at the end.

"Good thing you have that panther form you love so much, then." I said as she transformed, rushing in and jumping across, landing safely and changing back while I lazily used my ki to fly across.

Bayonetta then kicked the door open, where we saw a group of angels standing in a circle around something. "What are you boys doing in here?" She asked, getting their attention. "Are you hiding something from me?" She asked teasingly, causing them to take their fighting stance, at which point gestured for them to come get her. "Come on..." She taunted in a sexy, teasing stance. She then jumped into the air along with the angels.

I grabbed the slowest one by its legs and slammed it into the ground, putting my right Kamaitachi fan to its neck, trapping its neck between the blades, before closing the fan and decapitating it."You angels are just so wound up, you wind up losing your heads." I quipped.

Meanwhile Bayonetta gracefully and masterfully twisted in the air while shooting, dropping all the other angels to the ground, before stomping on each of their throats and firing a shot at the same time. One more came from nowhere and tried to attack her from behind, but she simply bent over to dodge, spinning and kicking him in the side of the head with a round kick, before launching him into the air with a backflip kick, then a front kick as he came back down, causing him to skid across the ground, before she landed on it. "You've been cheating on me, haven't you? Someone else caught your eye?" She asked, holding the poor angel, before brutally pistol-whipping it and sending it flying into a wall.

"Jeez. At least demons know when they're outmatched. These angels just think if they throw enough of themselves at us, they'll win." I said annoyed.

"Indeed. Now for the tricky part..." Bayonetta said, turning towards the girl, who was now curled into a ball, crying. **"** Oh dear... Something tells me I'm going to regret this..." She said as we looked at the girl, who seemed to look back at us and stopped crying. But she couldn't see us, could she? That's impossible. We were in Purgatorio.

"I don't think we should just leave her here, but WHY are you so interested in her?" I asked.

 **(My sweet, lovely child... She is the key to your future.)** The strange voice she'd been hearing ringing out in her head once more.

"Bayonetta? Yoohoo! Still there?" I asked as she appeared to be spacing out. "Fine, I guess I'll take this one." I said, turning back and drawing my guns to deal with the angels rushing in at us, dropping the 4 closest ones with my cross-draw shot (I use the one holstered on my left side in my right hand and vise-versa, so my hands are crossed in front of me. Then I un-cross them back in front of me when I draw them to shoot, or shoot as I'm drawing and un-crossing them). Another two came in from my sides, so I jumped and shot my legs out, putting my feet and the barrels of the guns to the backs of the angels's heads, pulling them in and smashing their heads together before firing and exploding their heads, giving me a little extra launch into the air to shoot the ones trying to rush past me to reach Bayonetta. "Peek-a-boo!" I said, quickly putting my guns in their faces and pulling the trigger.

Two more rushed past me towards Bayonetta and the girl, but before I could shoot them, Bayonetta did a triple backflip into them and pushed off, launching herself through a portal back to the human world, grabbing the girl, rolling and holding her protectively, looking at the angels still trying to rush at her, which she could still see despite not being on the same plane of existence. She then launched her soul out of her body at them, tackling two of them down to the ground, straddled as she pinned each down with one leg. _"I'm not normally one to play saviour, but I suppose I can make an exception and kill all of you. Just this once, of course."_ Her soul smirked before shooting them in the heads, rushing at the next one.

 **Background Music: "Bring Me To Life" by Evanescence (it works if you think about it and listen to the words)**

"Well, this is new. But that just means things are getting more exciting!" I said, stomping on an angel's foot to hold it in place as I shot it 5 times in the torso and putting the last bullet in its head... Or it would've been the last if the gun wasn't magic and actually needed to be reloaded. I then once again did a handstand and started spinning while firing the guns on my feet to put a decent number of bullets into a few more angels, then getting back onto my hands and doing some Capoiera movements towards another angel, jumping and flipping towards it, stomping on another angel coming at me at me from the side and doing a handstand again with the angel, repeatedly bringing my feet down into its face, firing a bullet each time to the point you wouldn't have thought the monster ever had a head.

 _"It's a surprise to me, as well. But it does give me a bit of a tingly feeling."_ She said, before dodging an angel's attack, getting behind it and slashing it to ribbons with her katana, then picking up its fallen weapon before it hit the ground, masterfully spinning it around and dispatching the large group of angels attacking her, before rushing to an Applaud as it appeared on the field, trapping it between a wall and herself, stabbing the staff into the ground and spinning on it like a stripper pole while repeatedly kicking the Applaud and spraying bullets all over the room, filling many angels with them.

"Alright then!" I said, taking on my group with Ghostshade, wheeling around and decapitating the four closing in on me to attack, rushing at the Ardor that was behind the one in front of me, taking a few cautious steps back. "Your turn, you Wonder Woman wannabe!" I said, catching the edge of the shield with Ghostshade's guard blades and pulling the shield away, spinning back and flinging the sword into its face and stunning it, before rushing in and punching a few holes in its chest with the guard blades.

Bayonetta now switched back to her whip, lashing at a few angels that tried to rush at her from the front, appearing to be vulnerable from the back, but when a couple of angels tried to attack her from behind, she immediately spun around and slammed the whip down on their heads, knocking them down and allowing her to stomp on their heads and fire a round from Onyx Rose, blasting both of their heads off at once. "Naughty boys. Never come at a girl from behind without her permission. You'll get hurt that way." She said. One of the angels she was previously lashing at, now behind her after she turned around, believed she had dropped her guard and tried to rush in, only for her to sigh and half turn, lashing the whip around the angel's neck and yanking it in, bringing her leg up as well for the angel to slam into once the whip had brought him in enough, looking up at Bayonetta with a winded, terrified expression on her face as she shook her head.

"Mm-mm-mm." She scolded again before firing the shotgun on her foot the angel was pressed up against, blasting a hole in its chest. She then looked at the last two, which appeared to be frozen in fear, wrapping her whip around the legs of the one to the right, causing it to fall and swinging it to the left, knocking its comrade off its feet, and swinging him in a full circle to slam into his ally before he even hit the ground, knocking both of them against a wall before switching back to Durga, rushing in and slashing them with one of her claws and exploding them with a lightning ball.

 **End Music**

 _"Well, that was certainly fun. Although... I'm feeling just a bit weary..."_ Bayonetta's soul said, before it fell to the ground and dispersed into a purple energy wave that seeped back into the real Bayonetta, who collapsed to her side from her protective kneeling position.

"Bayonetta!" I said, rushing up to her.

* * *

 _"Fly me to the moon and let me play among the stars. Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter..."_ Bayonetta faintly heard what sounded like herself singing as her consciousness began to return.

"Bayo! Wake up!" My voice rang out in a concerned tone.

"Mummy!" She heard a young girl call out, feeling herself getting shaken a bit.

"Kid, she's not your mom!" My voice came again, this time slightly annoyed and not directed at Bayonetta.

"Was I just singing?" She asked herself, confused as she finally came back to reality, starting to get up.

"Mummy!" The little girl from before said as she continued to shake Bayonetta awake.

Bayonetta finally snapped completely awake, quickly scrambling back to her feet away from the little girl. "Whoa whoa whoa! Slow down, little one. I am not your mother." She explained to the child.

"I've told her like 3 times, but kids don't listen. Well, me and my siblings did, but that's because Dad would smack us in the head with Kendo swords otherwise." I said.

"But... Mummy!" The girl said sadly, looking at Bayonetta and ignoring my words.

"Will you quit calling me 'Mummy'!" Bayonetta snapped at her.

The little girl started crying at this. "Well, you could've been a bit more gentle than that." I said.

"Your father certainly did seem to be gentle and you turned out fine." Bayonetta said.

"Yes, but I'm a demon. I can take metric shit-tons of abuse and come back fine. A little girl like her can't." I said. Bayonetta groaned and picked up the girl by the back collar of her dress, bopping the butt of her gun against the girl's head to get her attention. "Yeah, or don't pay attention to what I say, great guardian skills you have." I said quietly and sarcastically, but apparently not quietly enough, as this still earned me a bullet in the head, taking me off my feet and too the floor.

Bayonetta smiled at this, before looking back at the child in her grasp. "If there's two things I hate in this world, it's cockroaches and crying babies. Well, a crying baby cockroach would be truly terrible... So don't you dare cry." She warned.

"Yes, Mummy." The girl sniffled.

Bayonetta rolled her eyes at this and dropped the girl. You know, from her height of 6+ feet tall to the girl's height of maybe 3 feet. Great parenting skills, huh? "Fine. You've got to be a strong little one to survive in a place like this. What's your name, anyway?" She asked the child.

"Cereza." The girl answered.

"Cereza?" Bayonetta asked, the girl smiling and nodding. "You're not from Vigrid, are you little one? Where are you from?" She asked.

"I'm from my house." She responded playfully.

"Truly valuable information." I said groggily as I got back up, the bullet popping out of my forehead.

"Well now, I'll hazard a guess this isn't your home, so what on earth are you doing here?" Bayonetta asked.

"My Daddy told me to come here." She explained.

"I can't tell who's worse for this kid: you or her father." I said, earning me another bullet in the head.

"And whereabouts is this 'Daddy' of yours?" Bayonetta asked.

"He was at work, but now I don't know where he's gone." She explained worriedly, before hugging Bayonetta's leg. "I want to go home!" She said.

"I can't just drag you along wherever I go little one." Bayonetta explained, actually dragging her a few steps as she held onto the witch's insanely long leg. "So you better not be getting attached to me." She warned again.

"Yes, Mummy." Cereza said.

"Ugh. Come now little one. I'll help you out of here, but that's all." She explained, starting to walk away, before grunting as her head was pulled back from Cereza grabbing one of her ribbons. She turned around and pulled it from the girl's grasp before laying down some ground rules. "And you have to promise there will be no crying." She warned, starting to turn away, before turning back. "A single tear and you'll be crying alone. Got it?" She demanded.

"Okay, Mummy." Cereza confirmed happily.

"Ugh." Bayonetta groaned as she continued on.

"Could you repeat the rules again, I think I missed them." I said teasingly, pulling my coat's hood over my face to stop the bullets she shot at me. "Haha! Not this ti-!" I said, lifting the hood, just in time to see the barrel of an Onyx Rose in my face before she pulled the trigger, sending me to and skidding across the ground once more.

We proceeded on after I recovered and removed the pellets from my face, Bayonetta kicking open the door to reveal a massive wind storm outside, even a hurricane off in the distance. We were shocked at this, but proceeded onward. A couple of angels appeared and we attempted to shoot them, but realized we were in the wrong plane. "Sai!" Bayonetta called.

"On it!" I said, jumping through a portal to Purgatorio and blasting the angels with my pistols. "Let's go." I said, following them after Bayonetta broke a gate and led Cereza down the tunnel. Suddenly, a Beloved appeared in the tunnel and began crawling its way towards them. "Damn!" I snapped, spitting a fireball into its face and stunning it. "Go!" I ordered, Bayonetta picking up the girl and running down the tunnel. It tried to reach out and grab them while Bayonetta tried to break the next gate, but pulled its hand back in pain after I filled it with bullets from Doomspore. It pulled back and tried to punch me, but I rolled to the left and jumped to the other side of the tunnel, grabbing a dumpster and throwing it into his face. His full, undivided attention was now on me as he tried to smash and swat me. "You angels are dumb as you are ugly! You can barely fit in here, let alone fight and move-" I said, before noticing something as he smashed through more of the tunnel in his struggle to grab me. "No way." I said, before he grabbed me when I was distracted and squeezed as hard as he could, crushing me and throwing me down the tunnel after Bayonetta.

However, I make a VERY bad projectile and moved as much of my body as I could to redirect myself, missing and sailing right past her, breaking the final gate. "Sai!" She called, rushing after me, kneeling by my side. "I trust you're going to make it?" She asked, trying to sound calm and casual, but was clearly concerned.

"I'll feel better after all my bones snap themselves back into place... and we try out our new weapons." I said, revealing the two completed LP's, the final thirds having been what distracted me in the tunnel, where the Beloved was now stuck at the end of, unable to fit or break through it.

"Excellent. And it appears Rodin's waiting for us as always." She said, spotting a nearby portal.

"Alright. I'll be back in a little bit. Rodin's pretty lenient, but a 6 year old running around his bar MIGHT be a bit too much." I said, standing back up as everything popped back in place, allowing me to walk to the portal and head down. After a few moments, I emerged from the portal."I can't wait to see how you manage to use these things." I said, handing her a pair or LITERAL ice skates, that froze the ground around her feet as soon as she put them on.

"I'll have you know I'm actually quite graceful on a pair of skates. And what about you? Did Rodin give you something good this time?" She asked.

"I like to thinks so." I said, pulling out a set of 5 foot long katanas, one angelic, glowing a beautiful pure white blade with sky blue words on the side, reading "justice for the innocent, judgement for the guilty" while the other one was demonic, the blade a menacing black while the Kanji's for "death", "hate, "kill" and "blood" glowed a terrifying blood red color as the ran down the sides of the blade.

 **Masamune and Muramasa: Two widely revered sword makers cast out of heaven for their constant arguments over whose blades were superior. Rodin found them in hell and finished their argument by turning the two sword makers into blades much like the ones they each made. Masamune, the holy blade only able to slay evil beings that deserve death and Murasama, the evil blade being a sword of unquenchable blood lust. Wielding them together, Sai finds a perfect balance in these two vastly different blades, relentlessly killing evil beings.**

"My, my, aren't you the lucky one. I look forward to seeing you use them in action." Bayonetta said.

"Trust me, you're not the only one." I said with a smirk, sheathing the two blades. I then noticed the giant portal in the middle of our path. "Oh, great, another portal to Paradiso." I said.

"Well, we don't have many other ways of going. Come along, little one." Bayonetta said to Cereza as they headed through the portal.

"At least she's not calling me that, anymore." I said, following them.

* * *

I emerged through the portal just after Bayonetta while Cereza was a few paces ahead. We all marveled at the beauty around us, before Cereza tried to run ahead. "Hey!" Bayonetta called, grabbing Cereza by the collar again, causing her to whine a bit. "This is probably how you got lost to begin with." She told her.

"Yeah. This is one of the last places you want to get lost." I agreed, feeling my skin crawling from being in a heavenly plane once again.

Suddenly, the portal behind us disappeared, at which point Bayonetta dropped Cereza, who hit the ground at the same time as a group of angels. "M-Mummy..." Cereza whined fearfully, hugging Bayonetta's leg, looking at the angels, then Bayonetta.

"Don't worry, it's always scary the first time you see them." Bayonetta assured, almost sounding motherly, but turning to the angels. "So where was I? Oh yes. Your kind invitation. I do hope you've prepared dessert as well." She said, before ducking under two of their staves and shooting one, casually turning to the side just enough for another one to miss a stab attack on her, finding one of her guns under its chin and blasting it in the head, killing it instantly, before kicking its fallen staff and sending it spinning through the air, decapitating a couple of angels closing in on Cereza.

"Time to CUT a rug!" I said, rushing forward, first drawing Masamune and effortlessly slashing through a line of angels, half-turning and throwing Muramasa through another line, going clean through 4 of them before stopping in the 5th one's chest. I then rushed in, grabbing Muramasa, decapitating the angel and slicing upward through his torso cleaving his upper body vertically in half while the bottom half was still connected. I then jumped into another group of angel's, swinging Muramasa wildly and sending an angelic limb flying with every slice while throwing the occasional high precision slice or stab with Masamune that dropped each angel it hit with one attack. An Ardor appeared a few feet in front of me, readying its sword with its shield in front, challenging me. "Your funeral." I said, rushing in, jumping towards him and swinging both swords diagonally down on him together, the screen going black and two lines, one red and the other white, splitting the screen diagonally in half, side by side. I was now crouching behind the angel in a stance as if I'd completed my swing, standing up and swinging the blades to clean the blood from them as the Ardor's upper body from its right shoulder to the bottom of the left side of its rib cage slid off the rest of its body.

Bayonetta shot a few more angels near Cereza, who struggled not to cry. An Applaud dropped down right in front of her, causing her to scream and hide her face in her stuffed cat, but Bayonetta knelt down behind her and fired both guns into the Applaud, quickly killing it, at which point she stood up as a couple of Courage's approached us. "Oh what a lovely tea party! And dancing, too!" She said, turning back to Cereza and bonking her on the head again with the butt of her gun to get her to watch the fight. "Cereza, my dear, watch and learn!" She said, turning back to her opponents. One lunged at the two women, but Bayonetta kicked it in the jaw, sending it flying into the air, jumping after it and grabbing its tail, slamming it down on the ground, then kicking it into a nearby tree, firing on it and killing it before it hit the ground.

Meanwhile, the other one pounced at me, but I impaled it in the chest with Masamune, holding it out of clawing or biting range. I then looked down at Muramasa in my right hand, cackling madly while looking back to the Courage with a bloodthristy grin on my face. "Down, boy!" I hissed menacingly, swinging the evil blade in my right hand back and forth in front of me at blinding speeds, slicing the monstrous angel apart, before kicking it off my holy blade, watching it fall into tiny pieces.

Suddenly, the Beloved from before, which was stuck in this world in an angelic archway, managed to break itself out, looking down at Cereza, grabbing at her and even smashing Bayonetta's demonic barrier. "Little one!" Bayonetta shouted, running in as it picked up the child and looked at her in awe. She jumped at him to attack, but he managed to grab her and throw her away, looking back at Cereza.

He observed the girl struggling in his grasp, hearts suddenly appearing in his eyes. I was shocked and disturbed at this at first, before shaking it off. "Okay, no. I just- no. Nah-ah." I said, drawing my swords again. "No." I said, dodging an attempt to smash me under her palm. "No." I repeated, jumping onto his arm and pushing off, launching myself towards the other arm. "No." I said, slicing the hand off and making it let go of Cereza who fell into the arms of... Bayonetta? But she had a halo! Ignoring that for now, the Beloved reached for them again, but "Bayonetta" jumped away while I sliced the last digits off of the fingers as he reached for her again. "No! No!" I shouted, pointing for him to go away. He tried for her one last time, but was unaware of the hand signals I was doing. "No! I refuse! NO!" I snapped as Damascus' tongue launched out of nowhere and impaled the hand, pulling the beloved into his mouth and reeled him in, chomping down on him repeatedly. He reached out for Cereza one last time, before the demonic chameleon completely devoured him. "That little no rant was from Markiplier, by the way. From his Until Dawn animation after he got Ashley killed." I said to the 4th wall.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta recovered and noticed Cereza was in the arms of a figure exactly like her, but with a halo. "Little one!" She cried, racing after them as the figure started flying away, easily keeping up thanks to her ice skates.

"Bayonetta!" Two voices cried out, one from me and from another figure to my left that looked exactly like me, but again, with a Halo. "What?!" We each said looking twoards each other. "Ooh..." We gawked, looking each other up and down. "Hm..." We both said, leaning in to closer observe each other.

"Poke!" I said, poking him in the eye, causing him to recoil in pain. "Yes!" I said, crossing my arms and doing a peace sign with each hand.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta glided across the ground after her angelic counterpart, dodging energy beams and waves. The fake Bayonetta finally reached a place she deemed safe to get away with the child, flying up to a portal to... somewhere, but before she could enter the portal, Bayonetta shot her in the head, Cereza shrieking as they fell to the ground. She then looked back and forth between the two forms of her caretaker, confused. But Bayonetta gave her a telling wink, so she bit the fake's arm, forcing her to drop the girl, allowing her to run off.

The fake attempted to chase and re-capture the girl, but the real Bayonetta blocked her path, the two engaging in a stripper move dance-off. Bayonetta apparently won, since the angel lunged to attack her, but was knocked back after my angelic counterpart was thrown into her. "Nice of you to show up. Have fun with your cosplayer?" She said, looking first at me, then back to the angels as they got up.

"Nah. Cheap talker. And lousy dresser. His clothes are WAY worse than mine." I said as we rushed in.

 **Background Music: "Fighting Myself" by Descendants  
**

Bayonetta rushed in and locked guns against her clone, allowing me to slide in and kick one of her legs out from under her, allowing Bayonetta to throw her own kick to knock her clone back, then putting the foot down, spinning and throwing a rear kick to my clone's stomach, doubling him over and leaving him hanging off her foot until I jumped up and blasted him back with a few rounds from Last Regrets. "Come now, if you're going to take our appearances, you could at least attempt to show a FRACTION of our skill." Bayonetta said.

"Yeah, an inkling of our teamwork wouldn't hurt, either." I said. They didn't seem to pay attention, though, simply launching themselves towards their counterpart with the guns on their feet, Bayonetta locking guns with her angelic enemy and me turning around and crossing the katanas behind my back to stop the gun, turning to the right and slashing my counterpart's stomach, raising Masamune while flipping Muramasa and slashing back across my fake's stomach, before slashing down from his shoulder with the holy katana, driving both of them into his shoulder's lifting him up and tossing him into the air, kicking him back into a wall.

Meanwhile, after Bayonetta locked guns with her counterpart, she kicked the blade away with her left leg, spinning and kicking back, locking feet with her counterpart, who matched her move for move, each firing a bullet to push each other, back. But this is where the tides turned, as Bayonetta switched to her skates and claws, easily out maneuvering the angel, kicking her in the back, spinning around in front of her and coming to a sudden stop, sending an ice spike into the faker's stomach, before landing several fiery slashes with her claws, before switching them to electric and blasting her enemy back with an electric explosion ball. "Ready to show your true colors yet, dearies?" Bayonetta taunted.

Her clone staggered back, glaring at Bayonetta as if to answer he question before doing a few more fancy moves, spinning and sitting down, splitting her legs, taking its true form as a Joy, green energy glowing from its hand while it was near its... woman area, before it got up, producing a whip with the green energy. Then, my clone did some cool breakdance moves, ending in a double backflip, doing a superhero landing and becoming a Just, basically a male version of a Joy, holding its hand out like Thor calling Mjolnir, producing an angelic mace. "What a couple of posers." I joked.

Bayonetta rolled her eyes at this. "Not funny." She said. She easily dodged out of the way out the enemies whip, once again using the skates to outmanuever her opponent, landing the occasional kick or stopping on a dime and creating ice shards to stab at the bewildered angel. She turned the whip into a greatsword and swung at Bayonetta, but she dodged a final time, delivering a combo of kicks, disarming the Joy of her sword and summoning a Wicked Kick to knock her to the ground. She started to get back up, but by the time she had, Bayonetta had summoned a large wooden horse with spikes along its back, Bayonetta sitting on the head of the horse, waiting for the angel to recover. She took a few steps back, before completely trying to run, but Bayonetta summoned a chain and bound her with it, yanking her onto the horse, before putting painful pressure on her, forcing her down more onto the spikes, before Bayonetta stomped and completely broke the poor angel in half.

Meanwhile, the Just swung horizontally at me with the mace, to which I backflipped over his and cross slashed his back, causing him to roar in pain, turning and swinging the mace down at me, but I rolled around behind him and slashed his back again at his waist level. He roared in pain and swung down on me one more time, but this time I caught it with a cross guard above my head, headbutting him and forcing him to stagger back, holding his face, at which point I sliced his hand off to disarm him of the mace, before sending him to the ground with a rear kick. "A word of advice. It's not the size of your weapon, it's how you swing it around." I said, before creating a portal underneath the angel, readying the angel as a snack for...

 _ **"Zuul, mothafucka!"**_ Zuul roared, popping his head out of the portal and snapping down on the angel, pulling him back in and the portal closing behind them.

 **End Music**

And with them out of the way, Bayonetta destroyed the barrier stopping us, allowing to go through the portal just outside the building we were in Cereza had run through before we fought our clones.

* * *

We exited through the portal, heading down the road, where Cereza waited for us... along with Luka. "Mummy!" Cereza said happily as Bayonetta and I walked up.

She tried to run up to us, but Luka stepped in front of her. Mummy!? You're a mom? You!?" He asked in disbelief.

"Mistaken identity, camera boy." I said.

"Come now Cheshire. Look at me. Do I look like I have any interest in children? Now making them... Well, that's another story." Bayonetta said teasingly.

"Whoa! Whoa! You're getting the wrong idea. I mean, it might be the right idea. But not right now right, right?"He stumbled over his words nervously.

I looked at him with a strange look. "What the hell did you just say?" I said in my Chris Tucker voice. (Rush Hour reference)

"Yeah... Uh... Speaking of right, I'm glad I've been standing around waiting for you, because I knew we'd cross paths." He said.

"Did you now?" I asked suspiciously.

"Yes! For you information, I did!" He snapped, before calming down. "See, the only way to reach the upper crust and their gated island of champagne wishes and caviar dreams is over Prominence Bridge." He explained.

"How do you always know this stuff before we do!? Seriously?!" I demanded.

"Oh... Yes... The island... Lovely place, isn't it?" She asked, before Luka bent down and picked up Cereza. "Oh, now what!?" She demanded, annoyed.

"Don't play games with me! You've worked your magic on this poor defenseless child, haven't you!?" He demanded.

"She doesn't even have a spell like that." I said.

"You're a sad, sick woman, you know that? I was her age when you killed my father!" He snapped.

"Are you still on about that?" I asked.

He suddenly got a look of horror on his face. "Wait... No... You couldn't... Oh my god, you did, didn't you? You killed her parents!" He shouted in horror.

"We haven't even met her parents... Although, since her dad told her to go alone to some scary temple full of monsters, not a bad idea." I said.

"Hmm... Come to think of it, she's better off with you. You two are more hassle than you're worth.

"What!?" He demanded.

"Keep an eye on the kid. I don't know how it can be more simple, man." I said.

"Just keep a good eye on her, or you're going to catch hell for it. No good deed goes unpunished, and you never know when a monster may sneak up on you." She said as a flock of angels rushed us.

"You had to jinx it!" I said, jumping back into a portal, pulling out my katanas.

"Mummy! Look out!" Cereza warned.

Bayonetta then jumped through her own portal, firing down on the angels as I sliced them in half. "How in the-" Luka asked in shock, before the bridge began to get torn apart, forcing him to grapple away.

"Mummy! No!" Cereza cried as she was taken away.

"How can she see us!?" Bayonetta asked in shock, before we had to jump off into the distance.


	8. Rock You Like a Hurricane!

"Man. Crazy weather we're having today." I said as Bayonetta and I walked towards the massive tornado in front of us, ignoring the flying cars and other debris that came mere inches from hitting us.

 _ **"Ahh, the lovely Bayonetta. Such beautiful eyes... Despite the passing of time, you still hold the pride of an overseer, don't you?"**_ The angel, Temperantia, spoke as it emerged from the tornado and looked down at Bayonetta.

"I feel like a fucking celebrity in this town." Bayonetta said, before a trolley car apparently landed right on her. The angel laughed, believing his job was already finished, before he was brought to a nervous, uncomfortable stop as Bayonetta floated by, laying down on a statue caught in the wind. "See that!? Everyone rushes at me like crazed fans. They still haven't figured out that I don't give autographs!" She finished.

"Nice dodge, Bayonetta! I'll be up soon!" I said, about to jump onto a car drifting in the wind near the statue she was on, but a rock the size of my head came flying at my face, but I tilted my head to the right to avoid it, looking back at it as it slammed into a nearby building and put a hole twice its size in it. "Whoa! That almost hit me. Good thing I was paying attention." I said, before sensing something and looking back in front of me just in time to get impaled in the chest by a katana and thrown through the air, getting slammed into the same building the rock I dodged smashed into, held in place by the katana stabbed into the wall behind me. 5 more rocks then smashed into my chest.

"You've grown sloppy, Sai. You aren't nearly the warrior you once were. It's a disgrace that Tsukasa fell before you. She always was weak." My attacker spoke. He had decently long light blue hair that reached a few inches past his shoulders, the right side faling down over his face to cover one of his red eyes. He wore a long, black, sleeveless coat with strange shoulder armor that looked like 4 black and blue hybrids between giant claws and spider legs, dark blue vambraces (forearm guards), black pants and spiked boots. It was another of Zeidan's children and my cousins, Shuya a demon with power over wind and ground, a devastating combo. He is voiced by Jamieson Price, the voice of Tager from Blazblue and Diethard Ried from Code Geass. He's got a voice, so you know he's important. At least more than Tsukasa.

"Dammit! I should've expected that from you, Shuya!" I snapped.

"It's a tried and true tactic of the ninja: distract your enemy, then rush in for the kill." He explained.

"Yeah, but you know what else was tried and true? The Blades PROTECTING humans from monsters trying to kill and enslave them, not doing the killing and enslaving ourselves." I countered, headbutting him, raising my legs and kicking him back about 20 feet, pulling the katana out of my chest and throwing it to him.

"I do what I must for the Neo-Blade clan." He said.

"Aww, don't tell me that's what Zeidan's got you calling yourselves now. I mean, pick a different type of weapon or a specific bladed weapon, like the Broadsword Clan or the Saber Clan, but Neo-Blades? Come on!" I said, disappointed at the lame name.

"Afraid so. I didn't like the name, either, but that's what father insisted upon." He said.

"And THIS is what happens when Blades quit fighting evil and do what they want. Eventually, they get all high and mighty and go evil themselves." I said. A little bit of the politics of the Blade Clan here, we are allowed to choose whether or not we want to fight for humanity or do something else. Zeidan and his branch of the clan chose not to fight for humans, somewhere along the lines, they saw themselves as better than the humans and decided to rule over them.

"Humans are more of monsters than we are. They cannot be trusted to be left on their own and make their own decisions. They'll destroy this world. That's why we must step up and rule them. Guide them to a better future. That is the future father desires." He explained.

"It's the future that lets him be on top of everyone. And it's also not the future you want. I know it." I told him.

"I want what Father wants. And I'll destroy anyone who gets in his way. In our way!" He said, rushing at me.

" _Gomen'nasai_ , cousin... But for the sake of the world and it's people, I cannot." I said, drawing Masamune and Murasama, crossing the blades and blocking his attack, keeping his blade locked in between both of mine.

Back with Bayonetta, the angel continued to talk. _**"Long before this universe came to be, the first Armageddon split reality into light, dark, and chaos. It was in this battle that those who rebelled against the light claimed dominion over the darkness. We have but one goal: resurrecting the Creator and reunifying the Trinity of Realities. That shall be the purpose of your sacrifice!"**_ He explained.

"I'm not much for the talkative types. How about we have a little fun instead. You did plan on having fun with me, right? There will be plenty of time for pillow talk afterwards." Bayonetta taunted as she prepared to fight.

 **Background Music: "Tornado of Souls" by Megadeth**

Temperentia grabbed half of the chunk of concrete Bayonetta was using as a platform with one hand, leaving her trapped on the other half of the platform, which he began to destroy with his machine gun fingers of the other hand. Bayonetta attacked the hand hold the platform both to do damage to the angel and prevent the only thing keeping her from falling multiple stories. She was doing some damage, but the angel would never let go before the platform was destroyed. "Bayonetta!" I called, pushing back against Shuya, leaving him open for me to grab him, spin and throw him into the angel's head, sending it reeling to the side and forcing it to let go of her platform.

My cousin growled and looked at me furiously after that. "Is that the best you can do?!" He demanded, pushing off the angel's face and flying towards me, but Bayonetta brought out Kulshedra and wrapped it around his leg, yanking him back down to her platform. "You dare attack me?!" He demanded.

"Now, now. It's bad to be so mean to your younger cousins. And you should know better than to snap at your elders. I think you need to be taught a lesson." She said, cracking the whip.

He scoffed at this. "Back off! I'm warning you! My fight is with Sai." He said.

 _ **"And your fight is with me!"**_ Temperentia snapped, about to fire at her with his machine gun fingers of his right hand, but an energy wave from Murasama destroyed the stone armor covering his fingers, leaving them unprotected and looking like disgusting over-sized sausages.

"I don't mind switching partners. I've been looking for angel faces to mess up and your big mug is as good as any." I told the angel.

 _ **"Then you have sealed your fate."**_ He said, turning his attention to me. _**"Deal with her."**_ He said to Shuya.

My cousin growled at this, but complied. "Let's get this over with!" He snapped, rushing in at her.

"Sorry, Sai, but I'm afraid your family will be short a seat at Christmas this year." Bayonetta said, readying herself. He swung at her, but she activated Witch Time before the sword reached her, at which point she did a backflip, kicking Shuya into the air while slicing and partially freezing him with Odette, jumping after him and slashing him several times with Durga, each slash followed up by an electric explosion, finishing with an axe kick that sent him back down to the platform. She landed and rushed in at him, but he created a burst of wind to blast her back, sending her flying, before he created a massive downward breeze to send her to the ground at near terminal velocity, smashing her through two platforms before she managed to recover and land in her cat-like pose. "You're going to have to try hard than that, darling! You should take a cue from your cousin. He knows how to deal damage. Far better than you, it seems." She taunted.

"So you can take damage? Am I supposed to be impressed?!" He snapped, holding his hand out and causing her platform to break apart into 4 large boulders. She managed to land on another platform and either dodge or destroy the boulders as he threw them at her. He growled at this, diving down and landing on the platform in front of her, rushing in and swinging his katana at her.

Bayonetta countered the attack and used Witch Time, slashing a deep gash across his chest with Shuraba. She then kicked him back and he dropped to one knee, holding the wound on his chest. It sealed a moment later and he got back up, furious. _**"You're finished!"**_ He shouted demonically, activating his Devil Trigger, becoming a 10 foot tall, red, demonic-armored humanoid with a head like a spiked kabuto (Samurai helmet) with a black gem in the center of the forehead, black spikes on his forearms pointing backwards, two upward pointing spikes on each shoulder and two hook-like spikes on the back of each calf, a pair of red black condor wings on his back and a black and red rattlesnake tail completing the look.

"Sai's family does have flair when it comes to these transformations. Truly not something you'd want to run into in a dark alley." Bayonetta said.

 _ **"And it's not only my looks that are fearsome! Observe!"**_ He roared, rushing in at her and swinging his clawed left fist, easily breaking Bayonetta's guard and staggering her before he swung his sword. She managed to block just in time, but was still sent flying. He then broke the platform he was on into 10 decent-sized rocks and hurled them at her. She managed to again destroy most of them, but the the 9th one made it through her defenses and hit her in the chest, sending her flying back, but she managed to grab a lamp post in another chunk of ground and use it to swing herself upwards, allowing her to dodge the final rock, before she pulled out Kulshedra and grabbed the rock with the whip, flinging it back at Shuya, but he shattered it with a sudden and powerful burst of condensed wind.

While this was happening, I avoided the angel's machine gun fingers by jumping from one platform to the next. I tried to shoot a stream of fire at him, but the wind completely redirected the fire harmlessly to the right. The wind was also significantly hampering my movements when I tried to move against it. "Damn! Wind can be a fire's best friend, or its worst enemy. And in this case, it's the latter!" I snapped.

 _ **"I am the master of wind. In my domain, your fire has no place here."**_ The angel announced, swinging its massive fist at me.

"Not even the strongest winds can best the Blades!" I said, sprouting my raven-like wings and easily barrel-rolling around the massive fists and flying up its arm, using Bullet Time to avoid the wind dragons the monster employed to protect the glowing orb on the back of its arm, up until I reached the orb and began slicing and slashing at it with Ryuk, the kamas once again strapped to my legs as I did a Spinning Bird Kick while firing me Doomspore guns into the orb with my hands. It finally exploded and the angel screamed in pain, creating a big enough opening for me to do some hand signals. _"Chikara!" (Strength!)_ I announced in Japanese, a portal opening up below the angel. Beringoro, a massive black, spiky demon that looked like a cross between Doomsday and a gorilla rose its upper body out of the portal, wrapping its left arm around the angel's body, opening its mouth and biting onto its left shoulder, grabbing the angel's right arm and pulling with enough strength to easily tear the arm away, landing a savage punch to the angel's stomach, before vanishing back into its portal, which closed as soon as the monster was back in.

 _ **"Stop him!"**_ The angel told Shuya.

I was about to rush in and attack again, but a giant boulder blocked my path as 3 now circled me. I pulled my arms and legs in and folded my wings around my body, glowing orange as I built up heat and fire power. The rocks closed in when I shot all my limbs out and released my built up heat and energy, creating a blast that easily shattered the rocks. I then turned to the right as Shuya flew at me. I shot fire from both hands at him, but he roared and shot a powerful gust of wind at me and sent the fire back into my face, catching me off-guard and slamming into me. He created a giant spike from the ground beneath us, preparing to impale me, but I headbutted him and broke away, causing him to crash down on the spike. _**"You seem to lack the discipline you once had, Sai. But you are still formidable."**_ He said.

"I've grown since our last encounter. I've learned patience... And skill." I said, using instant transmission to get behind him and landing several hits with Last Regrets, before kicking him into a wall, doing a handstand and unloading on him with Doomspore, still attached to my feet.

 _ **"Enough!"**_ He roared, a wall of earth rising up to stop my bullets, before bursting outwards towards me as several boulders, but I shattered them all with All Clear. I was shocked to see that when I could see him again, Shuya was holding a syringe of angel blood.

"No, Shuya... You can't. You're a proud demon. You'll be forever tainted if you mix that angel's blood with your own." I told him.

 _ **"Forgive me, cousin. But for the ambition of my father and the Neo-Blade clan-"**_ He started.

"PLEASE stop calling them that." I said in annoyance.

 _ **"I'll do what I must to eliminate you and clear the road to father's success!"**_ He announced, injecting himself with the blood, almost instantly changing. His torso and and wings grew even more as his lower body morphed and changed. When it was finished, his 20 foot tall upper body was now attached to a giant 50 foot crab, height and width. He then created a massive sword of earth, which his crab body took in its left claw. _**"Now, this is the part where you fall down and BLEED TO DEATH!"**_ He roared, swinging the earth sword at me, but I easily dodged.

"You've brought this on yourself, Shuya. Now I'll have to fry you up with some butter!" I snapped, readying my guns.

While this was occurring, Bayonetta had been continuing to dodge the bullets from the angel's remaining finger while firing back her own bullets. The angel had thrown her platform high into the air and used a powerful surge of wind to pull it back down towards him at high speeds while he readied his fist for a lethal haymaker. But before it could land, Bayonetta used Witch Time to jump onto and run up his arm before reaching its vulnerable orb, unleashing a barrage of sharp, icy kicks with Odette, before doing massive damage with an icy Wicked Kick, followed up by 3 explosive lightning claws from Durga. This stunned the monster and allowed Bayonetta to prepare her summon. "AFAA TADAAG NEPTA!" (Sword of Dust) she announced as she summoned Hekatoncheir, 6 massive arms with dragon heads for fingertips, 3 arms grabbing the angel, 2 more grabbing Temperantia's remaining arm. The angel began to struggle, but the final free arm delivered a devastating punch to the stomach, before grabbing the body as well, the 6 arms finally ripping off the remaining limb.

 _ **"Curse you! I shall destroy you!"**_ The mutilated angel roared, shooting energy blasts from its head and remaining orbs on its waist. However, this helped Bayonetta figure out where her next targets were. The head was protected by an energy barrier generated from the orbs, so Bayonetta went for them first. Turning into a panther and rushing for an orb, she reached it in a mere second, turning back to human and unleashing some fierce slashes from Durga and several freezing Wicked Kicks from Odette, the orb exploding and the right half of the angel's hip/waist shattering and falling away. She then dashed over to the orb on the left, repeating the process and pulverizing the left orb until it too was destroyed, the left part of the hip falling to pieces as well. Now only one orb on the angel's back remaining, but Bayonetta soon found it and delivered the same quick beating she delivered to the other two, creating a giant crater in the angel's back following the orb's destruction. The barrier than went down, allowing her to rush the angel's head. Despite it's best attempts to defend itself, the angel lord was now helpless against Bayonetta as she delivered several devastating slashes with Shuraba and dozens of highly damaging blasts from the Onyx Roses. Soon the angel went limp as if it had fallen unconscious, at which point Bayonetta unleashed her final climax, summoning Hekatoncheir once again, 3 arms holding the exhausted angel in place while 3 more delivered a horrific onslaught of punches, the final one literally smashing the angel's head flat against its chest, but it sickeningly popped back out and went limp once again, the demon fists returning to their portals and dropping the finished angel to the ground.

At the same time, I once again dodged the slashes of the crab's earth sword and occasional snaps and smash attacks from the claw. I jumped up to avoid a slice to my legs from the sword, flapping my wings to shoot out some feathers as projectiles, peppering the abomination in front of me with the explosions as the feathers detonated on impact, creating some smoke as well, allowing me to fly in and deliver some deep cuts with Masamune and Murasama while unloading a relentless hail of bullets with Doomspore, even taking giant chunks out of the crab's carrapace. _**"Is that the best you can do?!"**_ He demanded, sending me back with a flap from his own wings and creating several giant stone pillars to stab at me that I dodged with masterful flying, turning back to face him, but was shocked at what I saw. _**"THIS ENDS HERE!"**_ He roared as he sent 5 massive boulders at me.

However, I smirked at this activating Bullet Time. He failed to realize it in his anger and desperation to hit me, but the distances between the boulders were perfect for me to repeatedly jump between them and reach him while he was wide open. "Sorry, Shuya, but I've faced mudcrabs more fearsome than you." I said, executing my plan, jumping between the rocks and easily reaching my mutated cousin, slicing away at him with Masamune and Murasama once more, before delivering a double fire-enhanced axe kick to his head, causing him to crash to the ground, stunned.

I then used the openings to preform hand signals while Shuya was recovering. _**"SAI!"**_ He roared, trying to lunge at me with all his limbs, before he was grabbed by Beringoro, the massive gorilla demon grabbing his crab body by the legs and repeatedly smashing him into the ground, ripping off and eating the legs, before grabbing his torso and the crab body, ripping them apart from each other, throwing both to the ground and repeatedly smashing them both, leaving Shuya's mutated body little more than a bloody mess while the crab body was now completely devoid of shell, allowing the gorilla demon to easily chow down on it, roaring in victory before returning to its portal.

 **End Music**

With the defeat of the angel and demon creating the massive windstorms, the storms finally died down, all the vehicles and rubble falling to the ground along with Temperentia. "All done? Well, let me give you back your toy then!" Bayonetta snapped, flinging the Courage from before that had foolishly stuck around at Temperantia, slamming it into a gas tanker, which slammed into the angel lord's face, sending all of them to the ground, where she slammed a small statue into the side of the tanker's tank, causing it to pee out a stream of gasoline.

 _ **"He was right! So wonderfully right! Your eyes..."** _Temperantia said, starting to laugh, not realizing the statue has peed a stream of gasoline all the way to where Bayonetta stood. She then stomped the ground and fired a round from the gun on her foot, the bullet creating a spark when it hit the ground, igniting the gasoline and sending fire up the stream, only for it to suddenly die out about halfway, to which Bayonetta sighed and fired a round into the statue's penis, causing the gas to burst out of its eyes like tears, making the tanker and angel explode.

"Gods-damn!? What the fuck?!" I demanded, holding my own junk out of sympathy.

 _ **"May the Creator, Jubileus, grace you!"**_ He cried out, before screaming as he was pulled into Inferno.

Bayonetta started walking away, only to stop and raise a hand to catch the falling trolley car that would've smashed her otherwise. "Bugger. And I didn't make any time for pillow talk." She scoffed tossing the trolley into the air as she started walking away. The courage was still alive and attempted to limp away, but the trolley car landed mere inches in front of him, leaving him shocked and horrified. He breathed a sigh of relief as he just barely avoided being crushed, but from the other side, I pushed the trolley onto its side, crushing the angel. I then looked over to the remains of Shuya's body, now back in his human form at normal size with only his upper body remaining. He was still alive, but not for much longer. "Sai. Come along, dear." Bayonetta said.

"Yeah, just... Give me a minute." I said, walking up to the dying demon I once considered family. "I'm not sorry for what I did, Shuya. But I am sorry I had to do it." I said, remembering back to the time before Zeidan and his children turned evil and decided to take over the world. They were once loving family just not taking part in our clan's traditions, but a mere 10 years ago, Zeidan turned his back on humanity and the Blades, seeking to rule those he saw beneath him and forcing his children to follow suit. Shuya had once tried to rebel, but Zeidan beat him half to death, from which point, he was Zeidan's most valuable, yet reluctant soldier. "You were a good boy, Shuya. Shame you were born to such a shit man." I said.

"No... I'm glad you did this... I knew what we were doing was wrong... But after the first time, I never questioned him again. If you were in my place, you would've defied him again as soon as you could." He said.

"And I'd be dead. You wanted to live. You can't be faulted for that." I said.

"I can... And I should be. I let that maniac do as he pleased. Kill hundreds of innocents... Even taken their lives myself." He said.

"And the lives you've taken have now been avenged. The lives he's taken will be as well." I said.

"Then please... Allow me to help." He said.

"I'm sorry, cousin, but there's nothing I can do for you now. I'm afraid these moments will be your last." I said.

"You can't help me... But I can help you. There's a secret technique in our clan. Forbidden, even amongst our most sacred and ancient members. Even my father won't use it." He said.

"And we're just going to abuse it?" I asked.

"Oh, maliciously!" He smirked.

"Bitchin', how we do?" I asked.

"First, you start by placing your hand upon me." He explained.

"Okay..." I said, placing it on the center of his chest.

"Okay, now... Lower." He said.

"You don't have a lower body anymore, you don't have any junk there. You can't trick me." I said.

"Damn. Fusing!" He said, dark red energy flowing from his body into mine.

I felt an incredible surge of power, attempting to create a simple small flame in my hands, but they came out almost instantaneously as 1 foot tall blazes in each hand, before changing into lava, falling to the ground and pooling around my feet as it seeped from my hands. "Whoa... Unreal. This is amazing! I feel INCREDIBLE!" I shouted tightening up and feeling my new power. "YES! YES! YES! YES! I CAN WIN! I FEEL GREAT! I! CAN! DO! THIS! AAAH!" I cheered.

 **[What are you doing?]** Shuya's voice rang out in my head.

"What?! Nothing." I said, somewhat embarrassed.

 **[Really? Because it looked like you were chanting to yourself.]** He said.

"Are you in my head?" I asked.

 **[Yeah, but don't worry. Supposedly I should fade away into your subconscious... sooner or later.]** He explained.

(Huh. Now I just need an idiot and I'll have a smart and dumb voice in my head like Deadpool!) I thought. "Okay, so what now?" I asked.

 **[Now, you have some control over my powers you can adapt into your own, using wind to shoot your fire out faster and at a greater range than before or make small fire tornadoes, mix the earth and your fire to create molten lava and melt away your foes. Or you can tap into my full power and use all the abilities I once commanded. But at a cost. You won't be able to use your fire power and it only lasts for two minutes. From there, my powers will be dormant and unusable inside you for the next 24 hours. Also, my personality should blend in with yours, so hopefully, you'll regain some of that discipline you once had but now clearly lack.]** He explained

"Sounds like a pretty big drawback. I'll just stick with the minor stuff. As for becoming more serious and disciplined, blame the people around me." I told him as I hurried back to Bayonetta's side as Jeanne and Damion watched from a nearby rooftop.

"Well, seems like you've got some new gifts to bring to the table as well. This journey's turning out to be a growing experience for both of us." She said.

"Definitely." I agreed.

"Yes, but next time, try to tone down the enthusiasm. Senseless chanting is right below cockroaches and crying babies on the list of things I can't stand." She said, giving me a playful shove.

"Noted." I said, blushing a bit and looking away.


	9. Highway to The Danger Zone!

**Beringoro: A monstrous demon living in the burning forests of Hell, argued to be strong enough to punch its way into the human world. It is one of the most aggressive and territorial demons in all versions of Hell, attacking anything foolish enough to enter its domain. Sai's grandparents use the beast as a punishment, throwing any unruly souls into the creatures territory to be quickly, yet painfully destroyed.  
**

* * *

"So... You absorbed your cousin's soul?" Bayonetta asked.

"No. It's more like he combined his soul to mine, so I got some of his powers added to my own." I explained as we looked into the distance, seeing the massive bridge we'd have to cross to reach our destination. "I am NOT walking that." I said.

[Oh, come on, you could use the exercise] Shuya's voice rang out in my head.

"I'm a fire demon, I already burn though calories like a hummingbird. And do you have ANY idea how many calories swinging my weapons around burns?" I countered.

"That bridge in these heels? I don't suppose I can call a cab to get me to the island." She said.

"Not likely. And I don't think you can call an Uber in the middle of a busy highway." I said.

Suddenly, we noticed soldiers deploying at the gate in the bridge ahead. "Look alive, people! We have an unidentified vehicle approaching! Close the gate!" One of them ordered.

Turning to the side, we saw Luka and Cereza in a huge armorer car as they sped by us. "Like always, he's causing problems for us." I said before the two of us rushed after the car. I reached it easily, but Bayonetta was indeed rushing past a number of other cars, wasn't going to reach it any time soon. "Huh. And I thought I was supposed to be learning from you!" I teased.

[Something tells me she'll make you eat those words.]

"Doubtful." I dismissed.

However, she soon slid under a truck, turning into her panther form and easily outrunning the truck, getting past the gate before it closed and slamming into and firing a heart-shape into the gate, which Luka slammed the car into, leaving a heart-shaped hole int it, before driving up the car Bayonetta had stomped into and positioned like a ramp, sending us into the air, Bayonetta landing beside me. "Learn something just now, did you?" She teased, to which I slumped in annoyance.

"Show-off." I said.

[You really did walk right into that one.]

"Woohoo! Did you see that!? I told you there was nothing to worry about!" Luka cheered.

"Mummy! Mummy saved us!" Cereza said.

"What!?" Luka asked.

Suddenly, the hatch for the tank-like vehicle opened and Bayonetta popped her head in. "Hello there, Cheshire." She greeted.

"Shit!" Luka said in shock, swerving a bit.

I stumbled a bit as I lost balance from the swerving, stabbing Ghostshade into the car to hold myself in place. "Dammit, Luka, you better not be texting and driving up there!" I snapped.

"Mummy!" Cereza said happily.

"It seems your driving is on par with your journalism." Bayonetta teased.

"I figured I'd beat you to the island! But the guards had another idea, didn't they? Not really my best plan, huh?" Luka said with a chuckle.

"Noo, ya think!?" I shouted.

"You think you've got me figured out, don't you?" Bayonetta asked.

"We journalists have to have some detective skills, you know? You're after a gem stone. And that stone has the be in the Ithavoll Group Building. I'm headed there too." Luka explained.

"How odd. You seem to know where I'm going before I do. Yet you don't seem to know how to drive a car in a straight line." Bayonetta teased again.

"What am I, a chauffeur!?" He snapped.

"Essentially, yes. You're driving the car. That basically makes you the chauffeur." I said.

"Cheshire, do you have any idea what prolonged walking in this salty air will do to my hair?" Bayonetta asked.

"Oh, here we go." I said, shaking my head.

"Well, I tend to use some product when I go to the beach." Luka bantered, running a hand through his own hair.

Suddenly, the army began shooting at us, bullets whizzing past us and missiles just barely missing us. "You need a head to have hair, so duck if you don't want your head blown off." I said.

A missile was coming straight at us with no chance of missing. "Little one! Get down!" Bayonetta ordered, shooting the missile, causing it to explode at a harmless distance from us.

Suddenly, a portal appeared next to us and Rodin rose from it. "Well, seems you guys are having quite the time." He said.

"Rodin?! What are you doing here?!" I asked.

"Well, thanks to all those halos you've been bringing me, I'm racking up quite a fortune back home and getting in good with my partners downstairs. Thought I'd pay you back for it. I've been working on these for a while. Figured now's a good of time as any to give 'em to you." He said, handing Bayonetta a set of gun nunchaku. "I call 'em Sai Fun." He said.

"Oh, really? Well, then, Sai, you'd best start upping your game, or else I may have a new favorite Sai." Bayonetta teased, admiring the weapon she was handed.

I rolled my eyes at this. "Oh, ha ha. And what's my new weapon?" I asked.

Rodin chuckled. "I really think you'll like these. You always have been a gambling boy." He said, tossing me a stack of demonic-looking playing cards. I grabbed a handful and they suddenly glowed an intimidating black and red in my hand.

 **Asmodeus: A king of demons and master gambler, Asmodeus was known to be unbeatable whenever his hand was drawn... because his hand was always rigged for victory, until he made the mistake of trying to cheat Rodin. Now with the soul of a gambler locked within these demonic cards, more power coming from better hands, the wielder will always find a thrill in battle... if they're willing to gamble their lives.**

"Ohoho, this is gonna be fun. I've always had a knack for playing the right hand at the right time." I said, looking at the hand I currently held: 4 of a kind with 4 eights and the 9 of Clubs. (Before anyone says it in the comments, I know you won't ever just draw some of these hands straight from the deck, that's just how the weapon works, you draw a random hand instead of random set of cards you can't just throw down on the table)

[I'd say playing cards aren't the best option, but I sense something special about these. Plus, the Gambit fans must be going wild about right now. That's a step in the right direction.]

"How generous of you, Rodin. But now I'm assuming you're expecting more halos than ever?" Bayonetta asked.

"Hey, you said it, not me. Just put my babies to good work." He said, disappearing down the hole he came from.

"Jeez, even when he's being nice, he's being greedy." I said.

Bayonetta rolled her eyes as well, but decided not to dwell on it. "Put your foot down, Cheshire. I'll take care of our pest problem." Bayonetta ordered.

"Wonderful..." Luka groaned.

"I'm getting the distinct impression I'm not wanted on that island!? But I love it when people play hard to get!" Bayonetta said.

"Alright! Time to test these babies out!" I said, readying my new weapon.

 **Background Music: "Ace of Spades" by Motorhead**

We jumped from Luka's car to the trailer of tow truck where an Applaud and Ardor already awaited us. We moved in to fight, but had to dodge strange energy spheres being shot at us by3 other angels with tubas or some brass instrument, 2 on smaller cars to the front and to the right of the rig we were on and another on an oil tanker a good distance away. "Sai!" Bayonetta called to me.

"I'm on it!" I already said, knowing what to do. I jumped to the small car with the angel on the hood and threw the hand I'd drawn at the angel, getting caught off-guard along with the angel when the cards grew to about my height and where at least 2 feet wide, now laying flat and circling around me protectively, slicing up the angel all the while. It was defeated almost before I figured out what was going on. I was both shocked and impressed, but shook it off, knowing there was still another angel shooting at Bayonetta. It prepared to play another note and launch another energy ball, but I grabbed the 9 of clubs, returning it to the size of a regular playing card, but filling it with demonic energy, at which point I threw it at the instrument, causing it to explode in the angel's face, staggering and stunning it, giving me enough time to jump up and shoot my hand outward towards the angel, the remaining cards surrounding me returning to their normal size, but shooting out like a spear towards the angel, knocking it off the tanker and right in front of it, causing it to get ran over.

With me dealing with her distractions, Bayonetta was free to smack away at the Applaud with her new nunchaku, easily pulverizing it while she loaded it up with bullets. The angel was dispatched in a matter of seconds, allowing her to move onto the Ardor. She was slightly annoyed by the angel's shield, but managed to use the nunchaku to fire downward, bouncing off the trailer they stood on and hit the Ardor in the wrist, forcing it to drop its shield. She then batted at it a few more times before finishing with a powerful kick to the chest, a devastating stomp accompanied with an icy Wicked Kick and another powerful side kicked joined by a Wicked Kick to send the angel flying a few feet before it died in the usual flash of light and scattering of halos. With them out of the way, she leapt to the car in front of the rig where the final instrument-wielding angel was, sending it flying into an exit sign above them and snagging its instrument, jumping back on the rig and onto one of the three armored cars chasing Luka's, each of which had an angel on them shooting at Luka, She jumped to the one right behind the rig and farthest to the right, killing the angel on top with a devastating axe kick, before turning to the left and breathing into the instrument, firing a powerful energy beam that easily killed the angel on the next car, before jumping onto it and then to the last car with the final angel, easily beating it to death with a wild flurry from Sai Fung as well.

We regrouped on Luka's car, but were forced to jump off once again as a number of grid-like lasers were fired at us. "Oh, god, it's RE4 all over again!" I said as we dodged, landing on the road where we faced off against a trio of Joys.

"Another bunch of jealous angels wishing they were as gorgeous as me. We'll have to show you just how far apart you are from the real thing!" Bayonetta said, rushing in at two of them as one vanished and appeared beside me, striking at me with a lunging attack. I did a back handspring to avoid it and jumped towards it, doing a barrel roll towards it with the cards spinning around me, slashing it a good number of times before I raised my hand with my index finger up, spinning it in a circle while lowering my arm, the cards spiraling down around the angel, cutting it all the while, before the 9 of Clubs flew back into my hand, the 4 eights becoming large again and forming a tight box around the angel, glowing with demonic energy as they closed in, starting to crush the angel while burning it with the energy, before I threw the 9 at the improvised crushing chamber, causing it to explode.

I looked at the deck in my hand, flipping it over and checking the cards on the bottom, revealing them to be the cards I just used, recycling my spent hand to the bottom of the deck. "So THAT's how it works." I realized. With Bayonetta, she easily closed the gap between her and the other two Joys, dodging one of their attacks and activating Witch Time, easily dispatching it with a deadly cutting combo with both Shuraba and Odette. With its death, time restarted and the final Joy attempted to strike at Bayonetta with its own whip-like weapon but she easily dodged it, switching back to Sai Fung and landing some painful smacks to the angel with it, before suddenly summoning the wooden horse, bringing out a chain and wrapping up the unfortunate angel, using her feet to push it further down into the spikes and finishing it off with a gruesome kick that forced the spikes even further in.

 **End Music**

Suddenly, a tanker about 20 yards away exploded, thanks to a CAR angel known as an Irenic, causing the tanker to roll towards us. Bayonetta and I both jumped out of the way, the Umbran witch managing to grab an airborne motorcycle and position herself on it. "Time to go vroom!" She said, starting the bike and taking off as I landed back on the road.

[Weren't you supposed to, you know, get ON the bike with her?!] Shuya demanded.

"I'm not getting on the back of the bike like a bitch. Besides, I got something else planned." I said, whistling. Suddenly, a demonic sigil appeared and out leapt a beautiful black horse with a flaming mane and tail, with cracks along his smooth, stone-like bodyfrom which more flames seemed to escape from, as well as its feet which were on fire. And yes, that was feet, not hooves, 3 toed feet that looked like a mix between bird and reptile feet that matched the head of the magnificent creature. It still looked like a horse, but with fiercer features, such as a mouth full of exposed, razor sharp teeth and a horn at the tip of the nose. It trotted up to me and lowered its head as I put my hands up to it, nuzzling me as I stroked its face. "Hey there, Brimstone. It's been a while, huh, boy?" I asked, pulling out a piece of charcoal and the great steed taking it and eating it like a sugar cube as I climbed up on his back, taking a hold of his flaming mane. "Let's see if you've still got it, boy. Hyah!" I said, giving him a small kick in the sides, to which he reared up on his back legs with a might whinny, before galloping after Bayonetta, catching up in less than a minute.

Bayonetta was a bit surprised at this, but soon smiled. "Just when I thought you'd run out of ways to surprise me." She said.

"And I'm riding bareback, so that's pretty impressive, too." I added.

 **Background Music: "Danger Zone" by Kenny Loggins**

We blazed down the road, firing at the angels and armored cars ahead of us with Scarborough Fair and Last Regrets while Brimstone even shot fireballs from his mouth powerful enough to take the heads off the angels. "I've always been a fan of ponies as a girl, but I might actually think about getting one if I could find one like that." Bayonetta said.

"I'd advise against that if you don't mind paying a visit to Hell. That's where I got him." I said.

The angels began to fire back, forcing Bayonetta to occasionally swerve or lean the back damn near on its side to evade some of the attacks while Brimstone dodged their attacks like a champ, firing back some devastating fireballs for good measure. We headed into the tunnels, which the military began to seal off with heavy gates, but Bayonetta managed to slide under while Brimstone and I blitzed through by going mach 20 for split seconds at a time, looking like a massive ball of fire each time.

Joys then began to ride on the Irenics, firing their laser grids again, but we dodged them with matrix level skill, which was even more impressive, considering we were going a couple hundred miles per hour. We kept going, obliterating angels in our paths while dodging any hazards they created or threw at us. We approached a narrower section of the bridge where a Beloved was causing absolute mayhem, picking up and throwing cars and even trying to smash the bridge. "They certainly aren't being subtle anymore." Bayonetta said.

"Now. They're being insane! We're putting a stop to this, buddy!" I said to Brimstone, who grunted in agreement. The beloved ripped the trailer off a tow truck and flung it at us, Bayonetta swerving to the right to get out of the way while Brimstone jumped onto the trailer and ran up at incredible speeds, leaping towards the Beloved, who attempted to swat us between both hands like a fly. "Careful. We're a little too hot to handle." I said as we caught of white hot fire and the hands closed in on us, but we burnt our way through without even slowing down, heading towards the Beloved's head and going completely through like a red hot knife through a stick of butter, landing on the road and continuing without breaking stride.

"For a horse like that? I might just pay a visit to Hell. I got the short end of the stick with the motorcycle." Bayonetta said, a tic mark appearing on her face, clearly annoyed we were showing her up.

"I only wish I could use him more. Can't really ride a horse through a city. Especially when it looks like a terrifying demon dragon horse." I said.

We continued to press on, evading lasers and giant gates while killing the angels in our path, riding through the next tunnel into a massive storm, but even that didn't slow us down. The angels even succeeded and started destroying sections of the road to stop us or slow us down, but we still managed to press on, bringing down a few Beloveds with drive-by slices from Shuraba, Masamune & Murasama and Brimstone's horn, filled with demonic energy to make it more blade-like. We drove through the next tunnel and finally reached the end of the storm, powering through several more miles, angels and tunnels. Things actually started calming down and I was almost tempted to drop my guard. "Get ready! Something could still happen at any moment!" Bayonetta said.

Suddenly, a huge part of the road in front of us was destroyed, forcing us to go down an unfinished roadway. "Dammit! I hate it when you're right. But I hate even more that these angels think this is okay! I'm gonna roast them for that!" I snapped as we made a massive jump from one section of the bridge to another. We kept going, outrunning the sections of the bridge as they kept breaking off and dropping into the water below. We smashed through the roadblocks to stop people from going down the unfinished section and powered forward until we saw Luka's car in the far distance, just across one more bridge we had to pass in the nearer distance, but a Beloved suddenly dropped from the sky and bulldozed the bridge, leaving only the suspensions standing. "Dammit! This is it! Make or break time, Brimstone!" I told him as he grunted in confirmation.

"Give it everything you've got!" Bayonetta, putting as much pressure into the throttle as she could, getting the bike to its absolute maximum, Brimstone and I riding right beside her, defying gravity as we rode completely upside down on the suspension, but managed to stay on all the way, clearing the bridge.

 **End Music**

Finally, we reached the road Luka and Cereza were on, but a Beloved flung another oil tanker at us, which Bayonetta used With Time to drive the bike up and launch into the air, jumping off the bike and twisting to land on Luka's car while Brimstone shot a fireball from his mouth, blowing up the tanker, creating a massive, fiery explosion the demonic horse and I rode through, catching up to the car and riding beside it. "Whoo! Now that's what I call a wild ride!" I shouted excitedly.

[The only thing cooler than riding a motorcycle is riding a demon dragon horse.]

But sadly, our troubles weren't over yet as the angels decided to stop playing around and destroyed a giant section of the bridge in front of us. "Holy crap! For fuck's sake, that's overdoing it!" Luka screamed.

"Right! Turn Right! Get off the road!" Bayonetta ordered. Luka did as she ordered, at which point she jumped into the air and activated Witch Time, freezing the Beloved in mid-air and coming down on him with a devastating Dynamic Entry-like kick, sending him crashing to the bridge below, landing a safe distance away as 6 smaller Beloveds, known as Braves, appeared to fight. "I know you don't want me here, but you really could have been more subtle about it." She said as Brimstone and I trotted up, at which point I jumped off the horse's back.

"Okay, buddy, you did a good job out here today. You go on and get some rest, now." I said, feeding the horse another piece of charcoal before another portal appeared and he jumped through and vanished with another whinny. "You're interfering with the human world now, angels. Before, you were just annoying, but now you're actually turning into a threat. And I'm more than willing to deal with that threat." I said, shuffling Asmodeus as the angels split into 2 groups of 3 and approached us. When the closest Brave was in range with his axe, he swung down at me as I drew a hand from the deck: 2 pair, with twin aces, Hearts and Spades, a pair of 4's, Clubs and Diamonds with the Queen of Diamonds to round out the hand.

 **Background Music: "Gambler" by Fate**

I sidestepped to the right as the axe and threw the cards forward as a spinning wheel of death, slicing up the angel before the cards returned, before launching at the beast again as I shot my hand forward in a spear-like motion, returning once more in a neat stack in my hand. I grabbed the card on top, the Queen of Diamonds and threw it as hard as I could into the angel's head, surrounded by demonic energy, causing it to explode and stun the Brave, at which point I tossed the other 4 cards into the air, letting them expand to a foot long, grabbing the aces as the 4's floated behind me as I rushed in with my arms crossed in front of me. "Two!" I started, swinging outward and cross-slashing the Brave's neck, at which point the aces disappeared and I grabbed the 4's. "Pair!" I finished, delivering a second cross slash to the angel's chest and killing it.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta easily avoided an axe swing from one of the Braves, before kicking and slicing away at the beast with Odette, as well as skillfully smacking away at them with her newly acquired Sai Fung "gun-chucks", cutting beating and shooting the angel all at once to quickly and almost effortlessly putting down the first of her braves. The next one suffered a similar fate, although this time, in the middle of the combo, Bayonetta had swept the Brave's feet from under him, using a Wicked Fist to launch him into the air, beating him even more while wildly exclaiming with each hit as if she was mimicking Bruce Lee, but sounded more like she was making the ridiculous noises from "What does The Fox Say?", finishing it with another Wicked Fist.

Back with me, I drew a Full House with the Kings of Diamonds, Hearts and Spades as well as the Jacks of Hearts and Diamonds. I walked towards the next Brave, waving my hand in front of me in a figure 8 motion the cards followed, slashing the angel in front of me, before I opened my hand, the cards flying around the Brave at the same degrees my fingers were pointed, before closing in and stabbing into the monster multiple times as I bent my fingers inward and extending them out repeatedly. "Full House!" I shouted as the 3 kings circled the angel and shot out fire, lightning and ice from them, hitting the angel with 3 of the most deadly elements while the two jacks rained down bowling ball-sized orbs of magic and demonic energy from them until the angel was finally vanquished.

Returning to Bayonetta, she was now teasing her remaining Brave, not even attacking, simply skating circles around him and dodging all of his attacks, giving the occasional whack or two to its back with Sai Fung. However, after dodging one more attack, she finally seemed to have gotten bored and hit the angel with some devastating kicks and finished it with a powerful Wicked Kick. It seemed to be over, until a Beloved suddenly appeared and attacked her. However, much like the Braves, she dodged the attack with ease, picking up the last Braves fallen axe and rushed towards the monster, easily outrunning his hand as he grabbed at her, running between the monsters legs and doing a 180, now behind the massive beast, jumping at its glowing back jewel and slashing it with immense strength behind the heavy axe, doing massive damage and bringing the beast down in only a few strikes.

Once more with me, I drew my final hand for the battle, a massive smirk growing on my face as I saw the hand, a Royal Straight Flush, a King, Queen, Jack, Ace and 10, all Clubs. I put the cards in between my fingers like Wolverine's claws, only with 2 on the right hand and rushed in, slashing away at the brave and easily staggering him from there, I did a double uppercut combined with a flip kick to daze the angel. before throwing the rest of the deck besides my hand into the air, scattering around the angel and releasing magic lightning to fry the beast and keep it stunned as I landed on the ground and rushed in. "Royal!" I started, plunging the Ace and 10 into the angel's chest where its lungs should be. "Straight!" I continued, stabbing the Jack and Queen into the angel's heart and spleen, readying the king. "Flush!" I finished, stabbing the remaining card into the angel's brain, disappearing and reappearing in a 3-point landing as all of the cards exploded at once, vaporizing the angel. I then raised one hand and the deck reappeared in my hand.

 **End Music**

We finished off the angels and saved Luka and Cereza, but we were trapped on the pieces of the falling bridge, plummeting towards the water below, before an angelic portal opened up and the two of us fell through, the portal instantly vanishing behind us.

* * *

 **Brimstone: Technically, not a summon, but one of Sai's loyal pets that can be magically called to Sai's location at any time with a whistle. Capable of reaching the same temperatures as Sai himself and as fast and strong to Sai as a regular horse to a regular human, capable of running across an entire continent before needing to stop. Sai unfortunately doesn't find many chances to ride his valiant steed, but when he does, they make an unstoppable team.  
**


	10. A Hellish Trip Through Heaven

Bayonetta and I fell from the sky until we finally landed on something solid. But as soon as we did, something felt wrong. I grunted in pain and dropped to one knee, holding my chest. It felt like someone was jamming a million needles into my body all at once. "W-what the hell?!" I demanded.

"Sai! Are you okay?!" Bayonetta asked, kneeling beside me, before realizing where we were. "Jesus. This is..." She said as she looked around.

"Paradiso... Nothing but heavenly light and energy all around us. I'm out of my element here... I can feel myself getting weaker..." I said, struggling back to my feet. "But... I think I can make it... Let's just keep moving and find a way out of here." I said.

"You're right. I'm not liking this place any more than you." She said, standing up, before closing her eyes.

 **(My dear, sweet child... Fear not, for I shall be watching over you...)** The voice rang out in her head.

"You okay?" I asked.

She shook her head again. "Fine. Let's be on our way." She said, the two of us walking off.

We soon reached the edge of the platform we were on, but luckily, there was another large platform not too far away which we could jump to with a platform of angelic energy. Soon enough, we made our way to actual land, but we were immediately ambushed by a trio of Ardors, two wielding the large tuba-like weapons and the third with their classic sword and shield, except its sword was a giant key we'd undoubtedly need to unlock something. "I believe that key is for us, darling. So why not just hand it over?" Bayonetta asked.

However, it simply screeched and swung at her with the key, forcing her to dodge, activating Witch Time. "Your funeral, then." I said as we both rushed. She slashed and sliced away at the angel with the key, quickly destroying him while I made my Asmodeus cards circle around me as I stood in between the two other angels, slicing them all to hell before actually attacking with the hand I drew, a Flush: a 4, Jack, 8, 2 and 9, all in clubs. I split them into a group of 3 and 2, moving my hands in an X motion, causing the cards to follow the motion and slice through one of the Ardors like the X I'd just motioned, pulling my hands back, the cards moving behind me before I shot my hands forward, running the angel through with the cards, before raising my hand skyward. "Flush!" I announced as the cards angled themselves at the angel and began shooting energy bolts at it as they circled it, before glowing with demonic energy, slamming into the angel and exploding it.

Time restarted at this point and the remaining Ardor fired its musical energy blast at us, which we both had to avoid, Bayonetta cartwheeling once again while I jumped and twisted to the right in mid-air to avoid, but I only just barely avoided, unlike how I normally dodge with plenty of time to spare with much space between me and the attack. Regardless, we still did manage to dodge and defeated the ardor together with several slashes from Murasama and Masamune, followed by one powerful smash from the giant key. "Having some performance issues, are we, Sai?" She asked.

"This is different from just those portals into Paradiso. We're like in the actual heartland. My attacks really are weaker here. I'm not nearly as effective as I normally am. I should've been able to finish both of those tuba-playing freaks with that one hand, or dodged that attack like nothing." I said.

"It's like you said, you're out of your element here. You can't be blamed that the environment weakens you. But don't expect me to fawn over you and protect you like the little one." She said.

"Don't worry. I'm not that helpless." I said, before noticing something to the right. "I've still got my instincts." I said, heading to a small building with a cracked stone door. I destroyed the door with a fireball and broke into the chest behind it, revealing a third of two different LP's.

"Excellent work. Even when you're weakened, you're still a force to be reckoned with." She said, putting the ki into the the statue of a woman sitting on some round object, creating beams of light that became rings, allowing us to get up to the small planet-like sphere above us.

We made our way up to the planet thing and encountered another group of angels, 3 Affinities and an Applaud, wielding another key. Bayonetta quickly summoned an iron maiden and kicked the Applaud into it, killing it instantly and disarming it of the key, which she used to easily destroy one of the Affinities while I did a break-dancing headspin with Ryuk attached to my legs to land several killers strikes on the other two Affinities, nearly cutting their heads off, getting back to my feet and unleashing a powerful blast of wind from Kamaitachi to finish them, the force of the wind finally taking their head off.

We found the next keyhole and Bayonetta used the key once more, causing the planet to rotate and create another path of light, allowing us to continue. We went up the path and dropped down on an upside down platform with a snake-like statue giving us another path to continue on. "At least it's still a pretty linear path we have to take, nothing too complicated" I said. But just as we got onto the snake statue, a giant, green ball with a ruby-like orb for an eye, looking like a green Minecraft Death Star, suddenly appeared and began chasing us.

"Yes, run or be crushed! Not complicated at all!" Bayonetta said, activating her Panther Within state and charging down the path.

"Just when I didn't think I could hate this place more!" I snapped, hurrying after her.

* * *

We hurried down the snake statue path, avoiding angels in the path and lightning strikes from above, using them to our advantages to activate Witch/Bullet Time to let us get further ahead of the green, block-y wrecking ball behind us. soon enough, we made it to another platform as the green orb fell into the abyss below. We discovered we were on some kind of wheel platform or something that could be turned, so after filling in the missing gear with one of those strange walls that change form if you hit them enough, we turned the platform so we could move to the next area, which was the city we had fought in Fortitudo destroyed.

"So, apparently cities go to heaven, too." I said.

"Yes. And it looks like this city can also be rotated. We just need that key over there to unlock the turning device." Bayonetta said, pointing to the key, before the green orb from before fell in from nowhere and smashed it, sending its pieces into 5 separate chests.

"Oh, real mature!" I snapped at the orb before it flew back into the sky, abyss, I don't even know anymore. I hated that place and wanted to leave. I could feel myself getting weaker. "Split up and grab them?" I asked.

"You read my mind." She said as we did so, busting open the chests and collecting the pieces, dealing with the occasional angel or two when they popped out of the chest with the piece, as well as dodging the green wrecking ball that repeatedly tried to come down and crush us, but ultimately, we reassembled the key and activated the mechanism, creating 4 rows of spinning angelic platforms for us to jump to so we could reach the next island.

"That wasn't so bad. What did you think?" She asked.

"Well, I opened all the boxes with the angels in them, so that sucked. But still, it's not like they were Beloveds or anything, so they weren't a big deal." I said as we continued. After reaching the island, though, we only got a few steps in on the next path before a pair of angelic viking ships known as Kinships appeared, the roof of its cabin opening to reveal a small silo of missiles, which all launched out at once at us. "Oh, you've gotta be kidding me. First cars, now viking ships?! And they have missiles!?" I demanded.

"It's certainly unexpected, but nothing we can't handle. Let's go sink their battleships." Bayonetta said, the two of us dodging the missiles and activating Witch/Bullet Time, Bayonetta jumping on the ship attempting to fly over us while I jumped to the ship in front of us.

I began beating on the cabin, or specifically the jewel on what would be the door, smashing at it with powerful kicks backed up with bullets from Last Regrets while having another hand from Asmodeus spin around and me and slice through the bow behind me and the cabin and its jewel in front of me, before I returned the cards to handheld size and looking at them, a Straight: an 9 of clubs, 8 of diamonds, 7 of spades, 6 of diamonds and 5 of hearts. "Straight!" I announced, shooting the cards forward like a spear, before pulling them back, repeating the maneuver several times to saw through the cabin and building up energy in the cards. Just before they sawed all the cabin, I clenched my fist, causing the cards to explode and destroy the ship before they returned to the deck.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta had been slashing, kicking and smashing the cabin and the orb with Shuraba and Odette, doing some massive damage, before having to jump into the air as the jewel fired a beam at her, forcing her to jump onto the back of the boat to continue her assault, doing noticeably less damage. The boat then fired another barrage of missiles, which she dodged this time with Bat Within, getting back around to the front of the ship, landing another powerful combo, before finally destroying the ship with a devastating axe kick, accompanied by an icy Wicked Kick. The two of us then jumped back onto the main path, just in time as another third of each of our records appeared. "Well, that was a pleasant little cruise. And we received a wonderful parting gift." She said as we each collected our third.

We then proceeded on to another one of those strange Witch Pillars at alters gravity and used it, sending us careening forward down a long path, filled with tentacles we smashed our way through, eventually landing on another platform, only to be ambushed by a trio of Joys. We dodged their attacks once again, Bayonetta summoning the wooden horse, torturing and killing one of them, before rushing in at the next one and easily putting it down with a powerful combo from Shuraba. I dodged a few strikes from the last one before doing a back-flip, hitting the angel with an uppercut kick, launching her into the air and allowing me to summon... **"Zuul, mothafucka, ZUUL!"** The demon canine roared as he rose from the ground and ate the angel in one vicious chomp.

We proceeded onward, jumping to the path in front of us, there was a large staircase with a small open area where the green wrecking ball would keep slamming down into, but we avoided it. There was an entrance to the Gates of Hell, but we decided to ignore it until we had all the pieces of the LP's , so we went on, discovering another light path leading upward, but past it was another path. We decided to take the new path, destroying some statues that held angels inside them and eventually finding another stone door, which we destroyed, opening the chest behind it, finding the last third to both of our LP's, forming them into complete records. "Perfect. Hopefully Rodin can make me something that can even my odds until I get out of here." I said.

"Yes, I'm also quite curious as to what will be drawn to my record." Bayonetta wondered as we headed back to the portal to the Gates of Hell.

* * *

We entered the bar and I let out a sigh of content, entering a place much closer to Inferno and demonic energies than Paradiso, my strength was coming back quickly. "Oh, man, this place is a life saver." I said, sitting down at the bar. "Cupcake Vodka martini. Double." I said.

"Rough time out there?" He asked, pouring me the drink.

"We were in the middle of Paradiso. If there are two places in the universe I should never be, it's there, or in the middle of the ocean. That's mostly what this is for." I said, taking a large swig of the drink.

"Damn. You've got my sympathy." Rodin said.

"A couple more LP's? You two are working me to the bone." He said. "Oh, well, I ain't got nothing better to do. Wait here while I do my stuff." He said, playing the LP's and descending into Inferno. A few minutes passed and he appeared, once again looking pretty beat up, but victorious. "They don't have a lot of charm, but they certainly made up for it with personality. Here you go, Bayonetta. Stand at attention for Lt. Kilgore." He said, handing her a set of rocket launchers tonfas.

Bayonetta smiled as she took them, a bit surprised by their weight, but still holding them without much effort. "Very impressive, Rodin. I was hoping for a nice heavy hitter. And these are exactly that." She said.

"And what have you got for me? I'm gonna need something good when I get out of here." I said.

"Oh, I think this will help you out quite a bit. Be careful. It's REALLY sharp." He said, placing the weapon on the table. It was a giant scalpel with a 5 foot handle, four 6-inch long spikes on the back just before the blade, which was another 3 feet long with a ridge on the back of the blade, as well as another small ridge and slight hook on the front of the blade towards the very beginning, leaving a perfect, long cutting edge toward the front. It would work perfectly as a naginata, a staff with a sword on the end of it. I gave it a few practice swings and found it to my liking. (Google "scalpel sword", you should be able to find it. It's a big 3D model spikes on the back, that should be enough for you to find it.)

"Very nice. I wonder just how sharp it is, though." I said, taking off my trench coat, hanging it up on a nearby coat rack and sliced downward at the sleeve. to my shock and amazement, it actually cleaved right through the sleeve, leaving it dangling as two separate halves, but thankfully, it sealed right back together into a normal sleeve. "Ohh-ho-ho... This baby is just what I needed." I said with a smirk.

 **Diesectomy: In the chaotic, savage lands of Inferno, a unique advantage is required for survival. One demon had claws, which he would sharpen on the strongest rock in Inferno, until he cut through that rock. But even those claws couldn't save him from Rodin, who turned the claws into this all piercing, all slicing weapon.  
**

"A pleasure as always, Rodin. We'll be sure to drop in when we have more halos for you." Bayonetta said, heading to the portal.

I gulped down the rest of my martini and laid down a few halos for it. "You're the best, Rodin. Not even Paradiso can bother me now!" I said with a smirk, hurrying after Bayonetta, the two of us teleporting back to the world of angels.

* * *

"Oh, I was wrong! I was horribly wrong!" I said as the holy presence began to weaken me again.

"Oh, come now, Sai. The more time you take to bellyache and moan, the longer it will take us to get you out of this place." She said.

"Then let's go!" I said, rushing down the path we needed to take. We rushed ahead, jumping across several platforms and repeatedly dodging the green death star as it tried to smash the platforms we were on, but to no avail. Eventually, we made it to a long, narrow, winding path, following it up to another castle with a crescent moon in front of it, but before we could reach it, the green death star crashed into the ground in front of us, revealing itself to be a Golem angel, preparing to fight us.

"Ugh. This one is annoyingly persistent." Bayonetta said.

"Then let's tell him to CUT it out!" I said with a smirk, readying Diesectomy.

 **Background Music: "Bleed it Out" by Linkin Park**

The Golem transformed into a Minecraft version of Gamorrah, striking out at us, but we easily jumped out of the way, Bayonetta blasting it with rockets from her tonfa while I landed a strike to the beast's jaw, slicing it off, causing it to screech in pain and turn back into the Death Star. It floated back a ways and transformed into Malphas, rushing us with insane speed from its massive body. However, we easily dodged it once again, Bayonetta attacking the red energy orb that was its eyes as I sliced the tail off the beast, causing it to crash and roll back up into ball form.

"It seems to be throwing all my summons back at me." Bayonetta mused, before glaring angrily. "How infuriating. I have no use for pets that don't obey their masters." She snapped, kicking the massive ball into a wall several times, apparently stunning it.

"Ha! Try not to fall apart on us now, you overgrown Lego monster!" I smirked. But unfortunately, Paradiso had weakened me more than I thought, so when the Golem turned into Hekatoncheir and threw a backhand at me, I was unable to get out of the way in time and was knocked into the air, before a punch sent me flying back about 10 feet. Thankfully, Bayonetta had used this time to land several hits on the red orb before the Golem reformed into a ball. It became a Gamorrah once again and tried to strike at her, forcing her to jump back, before it turned back into Hekatoncheir, throwing a barrage of punches at her.

"Sai, whenever you're ready, darling, now's the perfect time to help." She called.

I got to one knee and panted for a bit, before looking up and grabbing Diesectomy. "I'm on it!" I said, jumping and slicing the left hand off the monster, apparently stunning it as the hands collapsed to the ground while the red orb still floated in mid-air. "Perfect target!" I said, jumping up, slicing and slashing at it repeatedly before Bayonetta switched Lt. Kilgore to her feet, jumping into the air and throwing an upwards flying kick, one rocket launching her higher into the air while the other fired a missile into the orb. She did this a second time, before delivering a devastating combo with Shuraba. It reformed into its green ball form as we landed and started spinning wildly. "Now!" I told her.

"Right!" She said, rushing forward and kicking the green death star high into the air. "AFAA TADAAG NEPTA!" She announced, doing a dance as her hair unwound around her, summoning the REAL Hekatoncheir, which... bounced the ball back and forth between the 3 sets of hands like a volley ball. That was, until, the last pair of hands failed the return, causing the Golem to lamely bounce on the ground. The demon then resorted to simply pummeling it to destruction, with one final massive punch from 4 of the fists all at once completely shattered it into nothing.

 **End Music  
**

The portal closed and Bayonetta redressed, before blowing a kiss to the angelic barrier in our way, allowing us to proceed. "Well, this has certainly been fun, but I believe it's time we moved on." She said, continuing forward.

"Yes, please. Get me out of here." I said, following her as we proceeded forward into the castle.

* * *

We entered some large, strange chamber, which Bayonetta began exploring with great interest, noticing a certain symbol on the wall she traced her hand over, before suddenly going into some trance.

"Vigrid... I've been there before." She said quietly, before stumbling onto some strange statue. Looking on the bottom, she discovered a pair of names. "Jeanne? Cereza? The little one?" She wondered.

"What could she have to do with this?" I asked. Suddenly, the floor gave way beneath us as a number of tentacles shot out at us, Bayonetta stylishly jumping off them while I simply jumped back to where the ground wasn't broken, slicing all the tentacles coming at me with Diesectomy. One of the tentacles managed to grab Bayonetta and yanked her down towards it, but she fired away with Scarborough Fair until she forced them to let her go, to which they screamed in pain, before receding into the hole they came from. "Nice work." I said.

Bayonetta then gasped as she felt something on her leg, lifting it up and bouncing a bit as she grabbed and removed the tentacle climbing up her leg. "Tentacles... Why did it have to be tentacles?" She groaned.

"I don't know. Tentacles have served me well in the past." I said, remembering how helpful my Kraken gauntlets usually are. Too bad, for the sake of this story, I can't use my Devil May Cry weapons.

Suddenly, another trio of joys launched out of the hole and prepared to face us, an angelic barrier forming over the hole. Bayonetta dodged a kick from one and hit it with a few slices from Shuraba, before stomping down on it with a Wicked Kick, sending it flying away with a second Wicked Kick. I dodged a barrage of green energy bullets from another, activating Bullet Time and throwing a double jumping round kick with Kamaitachi equipped to my feet, blasting it back into a wall with two powerful waves of wind, before slicing it to ribbons with Diesectomy. The third one tried to strike at Bayonetta with a whip and golden feather, but she dodged it and summoned the wooden horse, torturing and finishing the angel off with the cruel device. The first one, which had survived Bayonetta combo on it, attempted to attack her while she tortured her sister, but I wildly, yet stylishly swung Diesectomy, sending energy waves through the air, rushing at and through the Joy, before I stopped, spinning the naginata above my head, before stabbing it into the ground, at which point the Joy exploding in an eruption of blood and tiny pieces flying everywhere.

"Very impressive. I'm looking forward to seeing what that can do when you're at full power." Bayonetta said, before destroying the barrier, allowing us to continue.

"Yeah, that's gonna be REALLY fun." I said with a smirk as we dropped down into the hole. We appeared back in the city, dropping down in the town square, or town circle, rather, surrounded by 3 Affinities. However, Bayonetta actually landed on one of them, killing them instantly, before rushing at the next one and killing it with some crushing kicks aided with the strength of Lt. Kilgore, finishing it with a missile as I ran up to the last one, slicing one of its legs off, stabbing it in the chest and flinging it to the ground, flinging it to the ground while rotating the blade to cut it in half horizontally. "An ambush. Right idea. WRONG caliber of angel." I said.

"I would expected a pair of Courages at the least." Bayonetta agreed. We then noticed we were on another large gear with the transforming walls nearby, meaning we'd need to smash them into the missing gears in order for us to proceed. We did so, dealing with a few more Affinities along the way until we replaced all the gears, at which point a Grace and Glory appeared. "A minor challenge. Much better." Bayonetta said, dodging the attacks of the Glory, activating Witch Time, stabbing the angel a few dozen times, before preforming her own spinning breakdance move to beat the angel with the tonfa rockets, finishing the move with a flying double kick to the face, accompanied by a pair of rockets to obliterate the beast.

Meanwhile, I side-stepped a few attacks from the Grace, before backflipping over a sweep at my feet, slicing off the angel's claws with Diesectomy. Impressively, it still tried to attack me, even without arms, but the attacks were simple and easy to dodge. "Okay, time to put you out of your misery." I said, picking up the trumpet of a defeated angel and firing a beam of red energy from it, vaporizing the Grace. "I always was a KILLER musician." I said with a smirk.

With that out of the way, we returned to the town circle and Bayonetta spun the town to connect the proper path, allowing us to continue. We proceeded onward until a bunch of Harmonies appeared, but we made quick work of them, me cleaving most of them in two with Diesectomy while Bayonetta jumped on the last one and summoned another giant chainsaw to cleave it in two. We then proceeded to the next large platform/clearing, where Fortitudo appeared. "What?! It can't be! We killed him way back in the Colosseum!" I said.

"It's not him! Look! It's much smaller and nowhere near as colorful. It must be a mere copy of him. Let's see if he compares to the original!" Bayonetta said, rushing in.

 **Background Music: "I'm The Boss" by Big Bad Bosses**

It was certainly more of a challenge than the rest of the angels thrown at us recently, but still nowhere near as challenging as the original. It lunged at us and shot both heads down at us, which we easily dodged, leaving its heads stuck in the ground and vulnerable. Bayonetta attacked its left head , with several slashes from Shuraba and a trio of kicks and rocket blasts from LT. Kilgore, while I jumped into the air and hit the right head with several kicks with Kamaitachi equipped to my feet, hitting him with blasts of wind the rose me higher into the air along with my kicks, until I was above the monster's neck, at which point I came crashing down with Diesectomy, cutting the head off.

This caused the monster to free its other head, roaring in pain, before charging after us, repeatedly weaving its head back and forth as it chomped in an attempt to either smack us away with its head or, obviously, tear us apart in its jaws. However, once again, we easily dodged its attacks, Bayonetta activating Witch Time and landing about a dozen kicks to its head, followed by a rocket straight to the face as I hacked and slashed away at the main body, leaving giant gashes in its upside down, baby face stomach, legs and even slicing off its tail. Time restarted at this point, the angel roaring in pain at the loss of its appendage, flying about 10 feet into the air and dropping down in an attempt to smash us. But of course, we jumped out of the way, stopping time once again, rushing in. I sliced off its wings, doing a jumping backflip into the air and diving down, stabbing my naginata into its back as Bayonetta charged up and delivered one final, fatal slash.

But as soon as the Fortitudo clone disappeared, it was replaced with a clone of Temperantia. It stayed back at a distance, forcing us to shoot at it with our pistols while dodging its forehead eye laser beams. But as it continually missed, it kept getting closer, until it got within 10 feet of the platform, at which point it lunged forward and grabbed the platform, firing a series of fireballs from its forehead eye, which completely failed to hit us as we hacked away at its face, eventually stunning it and causing it to slump against the platform, allowing us to get even more its on it, before a Wicked Kick from Bayonetta knocked the massive angel back.

It then started firing giant energy bullets at us from its massive gun fingers, but again, they were rather easy to dodge. "Man, this thing really needs to work on its aim! We barely even had to dodge those." I said.

"Certainly doesn't have the aim of the original." Bayonetta agreed, the two of us dodging as it tried to smash us with a giant, electrified punch, but we dodged once more, allowing use to hack away at the hand and I even sliced the fingers off, causing it to quickly pull back the remains of its hand in pain, before wildly firing more energy beams at us and we continued to dodge. It managed to nearly hit me with one beam, but I managed to even cut that in half with my might scalpel.

It roared in anger and fired bullets once more from its remaining hand, but we once again dodged. It then summoned all of its remaining energy into one kamikaze attack, rushing towards us, but Bayonetta simply smirked and fired one final shot from her gun that obliterated the weakened angel.

 **End Music**

With them out of the way, Bayonetta destroyed the next barrier and we continued on our way. We were about to jump to a church-looking temple, but suddenly, a giant tentacle with a baby's statue face at the end shot out from nowhere and smacked the temple, causing it to spin. "Oh, come on! That was totally unnecessary!" I snapped.

"The adventure's never fun without a nice challenge." Bayonetta said with a smirk, becoming a panther at the last minute and making the jump. I simply used Instant Transmission to appear beside her after she made it.

"Yeah, but I've always been raised to work smarter, not harder." I countered. A trio of Enchants appeared before us, but I sliced one in half while Bayonetta grabbed the second one and spun at high speeds, throwing it and causing it to slice the third one in half, before crashing and destroying itself an instant later.

We then broke through the back wall of the temple and jumped onto a platform outside it. Suddenly, 3 Kinships appeared, lined up in front of each other at different altitudes, the front one the lowest and the back one the highest. We scattered as they fired missiles at us, Bayonetta jumping to the right and firing at the one in back while I ran to the left and jumped on the one in front while the other two aimed more missiles at me. Fortunately, they crashed into the cabin of their comrade rather than hitting me, doing even more damage as I sliced the ship apart, destroying it before jumping to the next one, slicing its missiles in half before they reached me, at which point I landed on it, equipping Ryuk to my legs, doing the breakdance spin again to do huge damage and cut into it with a few dozen slashes, before hopping up, slicing upward with Diesectomy as I got up, contorting to an upright position in mid-air, then hacking down on the ship with one final strike to finish it off.

Bayonetta then landed on the remains of the ship beside me. "Impressive, Sai. I've taught you quite well. But don't assume you've grown stronger than your teacher." She said, jumping to the final ship, destroying most of the missiles coming at her with Kusheldra, before catching the last missile with the whip and flinging it back at the boat, landing on it and switching to Shuraba, slashing at the ship's jewel a few times before stabbing it a few dozen more times, then finishing it with a duo of devastating Wicked Kicks.

"Nice work." I said as we continued forward, heading down a path of energy platforms onto a new path with a long, roofless corridor in front of us, with dozens of tentacles with giant, spiky boulders waiting above, no doubt to crush us. "That's not particularly inviting." I said.

"It's our only way of getting out of here, so you really don't have an option. If you spend much more time here, you'll turn whiter than your hair." She said, pointing out how I was significantly paler than when we first started.

"It's silver..." I grumbled as we rushed ahead. I jumped in place a few times to loosen up and prepare myself before I blasted through the corridor, leaving a trail of fire behind me and shattering the statue of a Fairness in the middle of the hallway, Bayonetta soon joining me after rushing through the hall herself. We walked down a set of stairs and a pair of Glories burst out of statues of themselves at the bottom of the stairs, but we dodged their attacks and cleaved the monsters in twain, pushing forward.

* * *

Meanwhile, somewhere in the forest, Cereza was happily bouncing around as Luka followed her, watching her while also trying to figure out where they were. "What happened to Mummy?" Cereza asked.

"Well, you see, she just went to look for something, that's all." He explained, before looking away. "I can't believe that witch. Placing a poor helpless child under her spell. And that demon is supposed to protect humans from monsters like her! If they did anything to this little girl's parents, I swear..." He ranted.

But suddenly, Cereza fells down, starting to cry. "Mummy." She sobbed.

"No need to cry... We'll get you to your mom in no time. Here, I've got some candy if you want." Luka asked, snapping his fingers and somehow producing a lollipop.

"Mmm... What is this? It's yummy." She asked, happily sucking on the sweet.

"I don't know... It's candy. Strawberry, I think?" He explained.

"Hey kitty, I've got some yummies. Would you like some?" Cereza asked, looking at her cute toy cat.

"Is that cat your friend?" He asked.

"Yes he is. His name is Cheshire. He's cute, isn't he?" She asked, showing him off to the journalist.

"Cheshire... What a stupid name." He said to himself, taking a few steps away. "Well, so much for taking the highway... That just means we're gonna have to find something else. Now all I have to figure out is what to do about you." He wondered, looking at Cereza. "So, Cerezita. That woman's really your mom?" He asked.

"Uh-huh! My Mummy is strong and she protects me from scary monsters!" She explained.

"Monsters? I don't think you know who the real monsters are." He said.

* * *

Back with us, we destroyed the barrier created by the two Glories, discovering a deadly spike trap. "Well, they've certainly stepped up their security." I said cautiously.

"That only means we're going somewhere they don't want us. That's always fun." Bayonetta said as the two of us rushed ahead, avoiding the spears shooting up from below. Although, in my weakened state, I was still hit with 3 or 4 of them. Thank the gods for my regeneration abilities.

We went down the next hall and finally found another entrance to the Gates of Hell. "Need a quick stop, be right back." I said, all but diving into the portal. Bayonetta followed and saw I was already at the bar with 5 empty margarita glasses in front of me, with 4 full ones as I was downing another. So 10 total: 5 drunken, 4 un-drunken and one getting drank.

"Please tell me you're cutting him off after that." Bayonetta said.

"Of course." He said.

"It's all I need. I just needed some time out of the heavenly hell-hole and to ease the pain with some feel good juice." I said, swirling the martini, before finishing it off and drinking the next one. "I'm about a third into the Stephen King drinking game." I said.

"Dear god, man! That game's been known to kill people!" Bayonetta said.

"Hey! You know what else has been known to kill people?!" I demanded with a slur, pulling out Last Regrets and firing at her... only to hit the floor 5 feet away. "Yeah! Whaddya know about that?!" I said, shooting again, somehow hitting the roof.

"I'll wait outside until he sobers up." She said, downing a martini of her own and walking out.

"Yeah, you better run! I'm 'onna shoot all 5 a' ya!" I said, shooting and missing my mark each time as I downed the other martinis.

"Alright, cut off. Now get back out there." He said.

"You don't tell me what to do! I'm getting out of here! Because I want to, not cause you told me to!" I said with a slur, tripping over a table and landing on the portal, being teleported back to Paradiso. "Oh! That'll sober you right up!" I said in pain as the heavenly aura attacked me once again.

"Then let's hurry and find our way out of here." She said, continuing to a pit with a small island in the middle. Suddenly, a pair of Beloveds that appeared to be made out of golden water appeared, trying to attack us. Bayonetta noticed the Witch and Sage statues and realized. "I see. We must have to destroy them, turning them to water, then I use Witch Time and we walk on the water to reach the ledge up there. Seems simple. Don't you think, Sai?" Bayonetta answered. No response. "Sai?" She asked, looking around.

"AAAAAAAAAGH!" I screamed in blind rage and determination, vivisecting one of the Beloveds with Diesectomy, starting to fill the pit, turning to the next one and throwing the giant scalpel like a spear, slicing the next Beloved's head in half and filling the pit more, retrieving the weapon and rushing in at the next Beloved, slicing its legs off, causing it to fall forward onto my raised weapon, stabbing it in the head and turning it to water. An Inspired then appeared and started flying around, at which point I screamed again and held the weapon straight up as the flying serpent prepared to fly over me, cutting itself in half. One more Inspired rose from the ground and rushed at me, but I simply started spinning wildly with the weapon slicing the angel into sushi and finally filling the room enough for us to escape. I then climbed back onto the platform with Bayonetta. "I am done with this place." I said, panting heavily.

Bayonetta was a bit surprised at this, but smiled. "Well, good. Because I believe our exit isn't much further." She said, activating the statues and triggering Witch Time, the two of us running across the water and jumping up to the next level, seeing a portal back to the human world. "And there you are." She said.

"Oh, finally!" I said, rushing forward, until we heard something.

"Help! Mummy!" Cereza screamed.

"And not a moment too soon." I said, rushing through the portal.

"Little one!" Bayonetta said worriedly, rushing through the portal after me.


	11. Turmoil on the Tarmac

"Mummy! Help!" Cereza called in fear.

"Don't panic! I'm here. There's no need to worry about a thing!" Luka assured her. However a tree began falling toward them, Cereza screaming as Luka grabbed her and hunched over her protectively.

 _"Nope."_ My voice rang out with an echo as I rushed in and gave the tree the slightest push to the left, stopping it from crashing on them, before rushing in, bisecting 3 Affinities with Diesectomy, planting the polearm into the ground and lifting myself up to shoot an Applaud to death with Last Regrets attached to my feet.

"Get them, Mummy! Get them!" Cereza cheered as Bayonetta hacked an Applaud in half with Shuraba and blasted an Ardor with Lt. Kilgore on her feet.

"Mommy?" Luka asked in confusion and disbelief.

"Can't you see? Mummy and her friend are fighting the bad monsters for us. Mister, if you don't open your eyes you'll miss everything!" She said, taking off her glasses and tapping them, sending magic through them. "Look with these!" She instructed as she gave Luka her glasses.

Luka looked at her unsurely at first, but she simply nodded in confirmation. So he put them on and witnessed Bayonetta and I blasting away at the angels with our guns. He was shocked at this, falling back on his ass and taking the glasses off, still seeing the chaos around him, but no witch, demon or angels. He suddenly remembered back to his father's death when he was ripped apart, then Bayonetta jumping and disappearing through a portal and causing similar chaos to what he was seeing now. He began to think for a moment, before putting the glasses back on... just in time to see a quartet of Affinities rushing at them. "Shit!" He cursed, grabbing Cereza and running away. He managed to duck under one of their... staff... spear... scepter... things? I don't know, seriously, what the hell are those!? They suddenly found themselves surrounded by the 4 Affinities and a Brave.

The four smaller angels rushed into attack, but were easily taken out by Bayonetta's guns. The Brave rushed in and swung its axe, only for it to drop the ground with the arms still attached as I rushed in and severed the angel's arms. It threw its head back and roared in pain and rage, allowing me to easily decapitate it. "I think you need to work on that flight of fight response, buddy. Twice in like 2 minutes you almost got yourself and the kid killed." I told him, returning to Bayonetta, who scoffed, whipping her hair back before we re-engaged the remaining angels, 12 Affinities and 2 Ardor.

 **Background Music: "Can't Hold Us" by Mackelmore  
**

Bayonetta rushed in with Shuraba in hand and Lt. Kilgore on her feet, landing a few non-fatal slashes a couple of angels in front of her, before dodging the attack from another beside her, activating Witch Time and landing several slashes on her attacker, finishing with a couple missile-enhanced kicks, destroying the angel. She then almost immediately summoned an Iron Maiden behind the angel that was behind the one she defeated, kicking the creature into the torture device, which slammed close.

I readied Ghostshade in my hands and Ryuk on my feet, spinning and slicing away at an angel in front of me with the assassin's swords, wielded backhand as always, before jumping and back-flipping over an attack from another angel behind me. I landed on my hands and did a break-dancing spin with Ryuk extended, the over-sized kamas easily slashing through the angels in front of and behind me, decapitating them on my final spin before I jumped back to my feet. I then harnessed the power of darkness inside Ghostshade, using it to extend the blades and strike in several vital areas of the angel's body, before stabbing it in both shoulders and cutting it in half with a precise twist of the blades.

Bayonetta recovered the... polearm of the angel she had kicked into the Iron Maiden, stabbing it into the ground and dancing on it in a suggestive, but effective manner, spinning at insane speeds with her legs out to deliver devastating kicks at tornado-like speeds, easily killing the Affinity unfortunate enough to be the closest to her and doing significant damage to the Ardor, who had stood behind the Affinity. The armored angel was her next target, waiting and dodging his strike, before landing several hits on him and knocking him into the air, where she trapped him in a winch with a chain around his neck, giving a powerful yank to the chain and pulling the angel's head through the wheels of the winch, killing it easily.

I engaged my own Ardor at this point, dodging his attack and leaving him open to several punches to the chest with the spiked guards of my sword, before stabbing the swords into the top of his head, doing doing a triple front flip, throwing him into a tree and releasing a wave of darkness from the swords in my hand, slicing both the Ardor and the tree behind it in half. I blocked the attacks from the Affinities as they tried to attack me from behind countering them and activating Bullet Time, crouching low and charging up dark energy into Ghostshade before delivering one more upward swing and creating another wave of darkness from each blade, easily cutting my last two remaining angels in half and finishing my part of the fight.

After hanging the Ardor, Bayonetta came down on one of her last two Affinities with a powerful diving kick, before jumping away as the other one tried to strike at her with its claws, activating Witch Time once more after her dodge, delivering a devastating barrage of stabs to her attacker, easily finishing him, before assaulting the one she hit with a dive kick with another round of lighting-speed kicks, accompanied by missiles, destroying it as well, before turning to her final target , slashing him several times, before bringing him to the ground with a Wicked Stomp, finishing him off with a final Wicked Kick that sent him into a tree, splattering him against it.

 **End Music**

Luka looked on in surprise and confusion as Bayonetta and I walked closer, him questioning everything he thought about the witch. Suddenly, the ground began to violently shake. "Holy shit!" Luka said in a panic upon seeing the ground crumbling, rushing in as the ground began to break out from beneath Bayonetta and I. He deployed his grappling hook and caught Bayonetta before she could fall, holding her close and she closely embraced him, adjusting her glasses and leaning forward as he prepared to kiss her, only to pull and jump way, leaving him to fly straight towards the wall he had grappled to. OH NO!" He screamed just before he collided with the wall, collapsing to the ground on his back as Bayonetta landed in a badass 3 point landing.

[Why do we keep him around again?]

"Mostly exposition, but he helps out sometimes." I explained to Shuya's voice in my head, still standing on the crumbling piece of ground Luka "saved" Bayonetta from, still hurtling into the abyss below.

[I see... shouldn't we be jumping off this platform before we fall to our death?]

"Probably be a good idea." I said, my wings bursting from my back and flying me out of the hole, before I thought of something. "Hey, where were you last chapter?" I asked.

[I think Paradiso weakened our link to each other, so I couldn't talk. That or you forgot to write me any lines.]

"Uh... That first option sounds about right. Now, let's find out exactly what is destroying the ground here." I said, scanning the area from above.

Meanwhile, Luka recovered, frantically searching for Cereza's glasses, before finding them and quickly putting them back on his face, allowing him to see as tentacles began popping everywhere out of the ground, especially around Bayonetta and I, forcing her to jump back into Purgatorio and start dodging while I weaved around in the air to avoid them, also flying through a portal to Purgatorio. "What the hell is that thing?" Luka asked in awestruck horror as he witnessed Iustitia beginning to appear.

"Mummy!" Cereza called, running out to her "mother".

"Cerezita, this is way too dangerous!" Luka called after her.

But Cereza ignored him and continued to rush ahead, miraculously avoiding the tentacles smashing up through the ground, before Luka grabbed her and leapt back just in time to avoid a final tentacle that knocked Cereza's beloved stuffed kitten from her grasp, taking one of his eyes off and sending him skyward. "Cheshire!" She called, reaching out for the toy.

Bayonetta rushed in and masterfully jumped between and off of several of the tentacles as she tried to save the doll. She reached out for it, but suddenly the tentacles caught up with her, dragging and smashing her into the ground, where airborne rubble then fell on her.

"Bayonetta!" I shouted, diving down from the sky to help, but something suddenly crashed into my back, sending me careening down to the ground, slamming into and painfully skidding across it for several feet. "Ow..." I said.

[Downward aerial attacks that send opponents skidding across the ground. I'd recognize that cheap tactic anywhere...]

As Shuya finished this thought, the person on my back stepped off, walking around and in front of me, crouching before me to reveal a guy about my height with short light blue hair with long red bangs running down side of his face all the way to his collar bone. He had porcelain white skin, but had giant black cracks on his face around his black eyes with blue pupils. He wore a black vest with a white fur collar over a red shirt, black jeans and brown shoes, which had a chain made of shurikens attaching their backs of their heels together. It was Agari, another one of Zeidan's children and my cousins, who flashed a devilish, razor-toothed grin in my face. "Heya, Sai! Been too long, hasn't it? Wasn't it just 4 years ago, I almost killed you and left you for dead. Clumsy me. Should've finished the job." He said, maniacally and menacingly.

"Yeah, then maybe your sister and brother would still be alive." I taunted back.

[Hey, don't bring me into this. I never liked him and he never liked me.]

"I never liked Shuya. But you WILL pay for Tsukasa!" He snapped, raising his foot as he prepared to stomp on my head.

Suddenly, with a powerful magic shockwave, Bayonetta knocked away the tentacles and the rubble, sending a large piece of it into Agari's face, sending him flying back a few paces. She then glared at the angel while holding up Cheshire in her hand, managing to have actually caught the doll. "Well, kitty, what do you think we should do?" Bayonetta asked the toy cat, holding it to her ear as if it would answer. "He's hurt you, has he? Well, we can't be having that now can we!?" She asked.

Suddenly, as several more tentacles shot from the ground, each holding a large platform of ground, the angel Iustita revealed himself in all his glory... 3 ugly-ass stone faces, each choking on a giant tentacle with a baby's face on the end coming from their mouth. She tossed Cheshire over her shoulder and to the ground behind her, before drawing Scarborough Fair and aiming at Iustitia. "Let's rock, baby!" She said, issuing her challenge.

"I feel like I've heard that somewhere before." I said, before dodging a kick from Agari.

He snarled as he missed, before glaring at me. "I'm gonna get you, Sai! And I'm gonna make sure it hurts! But it's gonna hurt even more when I go after your precious humans and make them lick my feet for the rest of eternity." He cackled evilly.

"Shuya, I hope you don't mind me beating your brother, because I'm gonna make this hurt." I said.

[You read my mind... Our mind? Our soul? Whatever, just kick his ass.]

 **Background Music: "Light 'em up" by Fall Out Boy  
**

I charged into Agari, grabbing him and flying into the air, crashing into the side of the platform on the opposite side of the angel from Bayonetta, then landing on top of the platform, pushing him back a ways. He growled and pulled out a pair of butterfly swords and the two of us traded several blows and eventually locked blades after I blocked a downward strike. I tilted Ghostshade's blades at an angle, causing his swords to slide off of mine, leaving him open to several slashes, before I stabbed him in the chest with both swords, charging up the blades with dark energy, before unleashing the energy directly into him, sending him flying into Iustita with great speeds and force, knocking the angel off-balance as he prepared to destroy the platform Bayonetta was on.

While this was happening, Bayonetta dodged a strange plant bud that was spewed out of the tentacle baby's mouth, then several sweeping and smashing strikes from the angel's tentacles, activating Witch Time and landing a deadly combo of Wicked Fists clawing away at the tentacle baby's face before jumping back to avoid another sweeping strike from the other tentacles. One of tentacles spewed a purple liquid over the platform, weakening it, before raining rocks on it to fill it with cracks, preparing to finish it with a barrage of smashes from its tentacles, but before it could, Agari slammed into its back, knocking it off balance and dazing it, causing the baby tentacle to crash onto the platform with her.

"Excellent work, Sai." Bayonetta said, jumping onto the tentacle and running down it towards the face of the mouth the tentacle came from, dodging more strikes from the other tentacles and even spinning saw blades of energy running down the tentacle towards her which she had to jump over. She eventually reached the beginning of the tentacle coming out of the mouth and jumping, throwing a devastating flying kick to the face's nose, causing the root of the tentacle or whatever to be exposed, which Bayonetta began to hack and slash away at, before powering up demonic energy into her hand and severed the tentacle with a cat-like scratch, if the cat had katanas for claws. She jumped back onto the platforms as the tentacle slid off from its proper place and the angel cried out in pain and anger.

"That was a lucky shot, you little bastard! Now I'm gonna get serious!" Agari snapped, striking much faster and harder than before, red lightning now arcing around his arms. I managed to counter his attack and tried to slash at him, but he ran to the right, lightning arcing across his whole body and trailing behind him as he circled around behind me and kicking me in the back, causing me to stagger forward, right into him as he rushed in front of me, delivering an uppercut slash with his swords, jumping up after me and knocking me down to the platform with an axe kick, before fueling his swords full of red lightning and flinging them down into me, creating a huge explosion that shattered the platform beneath me, sending me towards the unknown purple liquid of death below.

"Not like this!" I said, maneuvering and extending Ghostshade's blades with darkness, stabbing them into the nearest platform and retracting the blades to reel myself in and get up on the platform. Agari growled again, before flying at me, still charged with electricity. "Alright, time to test out these new powers." I said, tapping into a bit of Shuya's wind powers to make a tall, but thin tunnel of wind around me, adding my fire to it and creating a Fire Whirl, setting Agari on fire as the winds pushed him upward and, adding insult to injury, I hit him with small beams of darkness from Ghostshade's guard blades.

[I wouldn't have used THIS as a test run... but that was pretty cool.

Back with Bayonetta, she was hopping between platforms as the angel's tentacles destroyed the ones she stood on, slashing at the monster all the while, dodging as the baby faced tentacle lunged forward, activating Witch Time once again and landing several more strikes, before dodging a rain of a small rocks the other tentacles rained down, before rushing at her with a much larger rock, nearly the size of the platform she now stood on. However, she countered by summoning Hekatoncheir, the demonic fists slamming into the rock to stop it, before pushing it back with a barrage of pummeling punches, one massive haymaker smashing through the boulder and into the baby face of the tentacle behind it, causing it to dizzily land on the platform, letting her jump on once again, running down it again and delivering another flying kick, exposing the root of the next tentacle, which she again attacked and severed.

Back with me, I stopped the fire whirl and jumped up after Agari, kicking him down into the purple water, landing back on my platform. He screamed a bit, glaring up at me. "Sai! I won't go down this way!" He shouted, pulling out a vial, no doubt of angel blood and downing it just before sinking into the depths of the deadly liquid. Suddenly, a massive form flew up at high speeds and landed on the platform with me. It was an enormous white and black wasp with a massive, harpoon-like stinger, legs like swords and deadly, saw-like mandibles taking the place of Agari's mouth. "A wasp... How fitting. Because after we take care of you and the rest of your clan, the Neo-Blades will swarm and make all humanity bow to us!" He laughed.

[Still can't believe that's what we went with...]

"It IS a stupid name." I agreed, before glaring at Agari. "Very well. If you think you can kill me, bring it! I learned long ago, the only way to defeat a wasp, is to burn it!" I said, surrounding Ghostshade with flames of darkness, creating a fireball and launching it into Agari's face, staggering him. he charged forward, trying to stab at me with his sword-like legs, but I masterfully dodged and weaved through them, jumping back to avoid his snapping mandibles. "It's time to stop!" I said, activating Bullet Time and striking his face several times, before delivering a powerful backflip kick that knocked him off the platform. He recovered in mid-air, before repeatedly firing his stinger, still attached by a strong cord, retracting it and firing again, destroying my platform and forcing me to jump to the next. He fired once more, this time aiming for me directly, but I dodged the stinger, activating Bullet Time again, connecting Ghostshade together into a make-shift boomerang, surrounding it in dark fire again and throwing it, guiding it with wind to sever Agari's stinger, then slice up his entire body, seriously damaging him and making him collapse on my platform. He struggled to his feet and staggered weakly, making one final attempt to lunge at me, unaware of the hand signals I was preforming...

Bayonetta continued to dodge all the tentacles, seeds and rocks, taking whatever chances she got to land an attack, eventually making the tentacle retreat and try to hit her with a giant boulder, which she again countered and smashed through, only to be met with another boulder, but it met the same fate, smashed by a haymaker that finally hit the tentacle behind it, stunning it and allowing Bayonetta to run along it, kick the angel in it's last face and sever the final tentacle. Now fueled by rage, pain and desperation, the angel began spinning and building up huge amounts of angelic energy, before charging the witch. However, again, she defended herself with a counter via giant demon fist, before preforming a new dance and chant. "TELOC VOVIM! - (Dragon of Death!)" She announced, her hair shooting high into the air, nearly reaching a plane, before descending into the massive abyss below, rising up from the other side as the absolutely massive centipede beast, Scolopendra, which wrapped around the angel, slowly squeezing him like a snake until finally crushing him into a massive ball of blood and broken faces.

Back with me, I uttered one final word just as Agari made his last attempt to lunge. "Mure... - (Swarm...)" I spoke, a massive queen bee, Hivemind, suddenly crashing down Agari, easily twice his size. However, upon closer inspection, this queen was made up of hundreds of much smaller bees, which began to break apart and swarm around Agari, eventually engulfing him to the point absolutely no part of him could be seen. The camera then pans to the side, before changing to a thermal camera, ranging from a cool 60 in dark purple... to over 600 degrees in a blinding white, which as the camera pans back to the swarm, practically takes up the whole screen, while I, at 200 degrees, was only a light orange. I then jumped to a new platform just as the swarm exploded, turning the whole screen white, before it faded, returning to a normal camera, revealing Agari's completely charred body.

 **End Music**

"That was certainly an explosive finish." I smirked.

[Nice and Toasty. Good work.]

"Thanks." I said.

"Quite the finish, Sai. I like to think I've roughed him up enough. How about now, kitty?" Bayonetta asked the plushie, holding it to her ear. "Still not enough you say?" She asked, before turning to Iustitia. "You can go another round, can't you?" She asked.

"Man, this is a violent plushie. I love it." I said.

"It was as the Lumen Sage foretold. Your power is indeed magnificent." Iustita said in amazement.

"The Lumen Sage?" Bayonetta asked.

"I thought they were wiped out ages ago." I said.

 _ **"Long have two eyes, one light and one dark, watched over the world and its history. It is this power that will allow the creator to start a new cycle of creation. Bayonetta, may Jubileus, the Creator, grace you!"**_ The angel spouted the usual nonsense, before being dragged into Inferno. _ **  
**_

"Now where are my new best friends?" She wondered. "I suppose one of them is an adult, so they should be ok." She said, walking off to look for them.

"Yeah, if you can call him that." I said, following her.

[I wouldn't.]

* * *

 **Fire Whirls: A rare, but real life natural event that occur during some wild fires under VERY precise conditions, hot air from the fires sucking in cold air, creating a swirling vortex of fire that, unlike regular wildfires, which can't move and eventually run out of fuel, can move and continue to suck up oxygen, continuing seemingly endlessly. One of the most dangerous natural phenomenon, as it can burn much hotter than regular wildfires, with the potential to reach up to 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit. While rare in nature, they are surprisingly easy to recreate at home with the proper equipment. DO NOT DO THIS. This has been your Fire Fact of the day.  
**

 **Hivemind: A massive, ravenous collection of demonic bees, seeking only to expand and destroy anything that isn't themselves. These creatures are the true flames of hell, swarming any opponent, constantly biting and stinging with venom and poison that makes lava feel cool by comparison, all the while vibrating and reaching temperatures that put even the surface of the sun to shame.**


	12. Flight of Fury

"Excuse me, sir, may I have my glasses back?" Cereza asked, looking at Luka, who indeed still had her glasses, scanning for more angels.

"Huh? Oh... Yeah... Here you go." He said, returning the spectacles. "Cereza, how did you get such... Magical glasses?" He asked.

Cereza simply laughed at this. "The glasses aren't magic, silly. I can see the monsters without them!" She said.

"Monsters... Not quite. So, uh, has Bayonetta, I mean your mom, been fighting these big bad monsters for a long time?" He asked.

"Mummy is a witch, and witches protect people and are very strong. When I grow up, I'll be strong too and I'll protect my mummy!" Cereza explained, posing like a hero.

"Wait... You think witches do what!? Aww, forget it. No point in arguing with a little kid. I'll manage on my own." He said, taking a few steps away.

"I'm sure you will." Bayonetta said from behind him, startling him and making him fall back into a wall.

"Seriously, you're still falling for it? Come on, man, she's been doing this for like 5 years now." I said.

[If he hasn't learned by now, he never will.]

"Mummy!" Cereza cheered happily.

"You never cease to amuse me, Cheshire." Bayonetta said, referring to an airship. "I suppose that's your next target?" She asked, before handing Cereza her doll. "This is yours, little one. You didn't cry while I was gone, did you?" She asked.

Cereza inspected Cheshire, noticing his eye was stitched on at the wrong angle, but ignored it and smiled up at her mother. "Nope." She said.

"Good." Bayonetta said.

"Yeah, bet you didn't know I could sew, did you?" I said to the 4th wall, gesturing to the once severed eye of the doll.

[Great work putting down stereotypes.]

"Bayonetta... No matter how I ask, no matter how many times, you always say the same thing." Luka grumbled.

"Come now, kitty. You know it was all ju-" Bayonetta started.

"-a misunderstanding. You're so stubborn, you know that!? My father... He was a journalist, too. In fact, he was twice the man I could ever hope to be. He was obsessed with one case his entire career. A case so bizarre it took over his life." He said.

"Uh huh. You going somewhere with this?" I asked.

"They could have made a movie of the details: The followers of darkness, the Umbra Witches, and their light world counterparts, the Lumen Sages, controlling everything with a power known as 'The Eyes of the World.' Then, the light and dark clans suddenly disappeared from their medieval home in Europe. You may be familiar with the town. You're standing in it. Welcome to Vigrid, 500 years later." He welcomed her.

"500 years." Bayonetta said in disbelief.

"Well, they certainly spruced it up after all these years. Now if they could just get it a little further from Paradiso, that'd be great." I said, the holy-esque air still irritating me.

"Each clan, working at the behest of the powers that be, sought to lead their fractured world towards peace. They both possessed an 'Eye', said to have the power to create history, that they used to oversee the world. However, their spirit of cooperation did not last, for amongst them, a pair of young star-crossed lovers conceived a child that sent the clans on a path to ruin. The woman was thrown in jail, and the man exiled form his clan. However, the child remained with the Umbra, raised as a black sheep, even amongst the darkness." Luka started.

"People really need to learn to keep it in their pants." I said.

[Don't YOU have 2 girlfriends?]

"I said people, not me." I said.

"Since the balance between light and dark had been lost, both clans spiraled into decay. Legend had it that the two 'Eyes' could be united to control reality itself, and this legend fueled ambition and desire, leading to a myriad of battles between the clans. In fact, it led to their mutual destruction. My father was mocked for buying such a fairy tale; however, I believed his story. And I believe it more than ever now that I've found you. The memory of the clan lingers on, despite the passing on 500 years. What on earth was my father searching for? And why did he have to die for it?" He asked.

"He found something he shouldn't and made people mad. Angels probably weren't happy he found one of their last and greatest enemies." I said.

"I have to discover the truth with my own eyes. That's why I haven't given up my chase for it. Or you. The head of the Ithavoll Group, the multi-national that dominates Vigrid, recently tried to sell an enormous gem stone on the black market. If he isn't selling out in the open, it means we're going to have to acquire it by other means. And that starts by sneaking on to that jet." Luka explained, heading towards the aircraft.

"Stealing a jet? That's pretty ballsy. Well, have fun in prison." I said.

Bayonetta sighed and leaned up against a wall crossing her arms and leg. Cereza hurried beside her mother and quickly imitated her pose. They stood like that for some time before... "Mummy, are you looking for something?" Cereza finally asked.

"I am." Bayonetta confirmed.

"How did you lose it?" The girl asked.

"Little one, do you have anything you really like? Something really important to you?" The Umbran witch asked.

Cereza initially presented Cheshire, but then thought for a moment and revealed an Umbran Watch. "Yes! This! I love it." She said.

"Oh, hey, that looks like your thing." I said, pointing to Bayonetta's own watch.

[Yeah. Like, EXACTLY that same.]

"I'm sure it's just a coincidence." I said.

Bayonetta took and examined it for a moment, before apparently having another flashback. "Where did you get this?" She asked.

"You gave it to me, mummy. For my birthday!" Cereza explained.

Bayonetta looked at it once more for a moment, before taking a portion of one of her red... hair things and fashioning the watch into a necklace with it. "When you love something, never lose it. Understand, little one? You must keep it safe, close to your heart." She said, slipping it over Cereza's head.

"Aww. Even your icy heart can be warm." I said with a smile, before she shot me in the head again.

"And it can freeze back up in an instant." She said.

The awestruck Cereza soon became ecstatic, happily wandering around while proudly holding her new necklace aloft, before hiding it under her gown, turning to us and waving, when an explosion suddenly occurred "Little one!" Bayonetta called.

"What the hell!?" I demanded.

Cereza turned and screamed when a flaming piece of debris came dropping down towards her, but Luka managed to save her, landing on the wing of the cargo plane as Bayonetta and I jumped to safety, just in time to avoid a shipping container crashing on us. But suddenly, the plane rocked from the force of so many heavy objects crashing nearby, causing Luka to lose his hold on Cereza, who slid and dropped into the aircraft. "Cereza! Damn." Luka cursed. The plane began to pick up speed and adjust its flaps, causing Luka to roll and fall off.

Bayonetta and I managed to jump on, though, watching as the plane flew into the sky. "You mentioned frequent flyer miles. Looks like we're cashing them in." I said.

"Finding Cereza's our top priority. And heaven help any angels that get in our way!" She said.

* * *

We burst into the plane through a vent and quickly made our way forward, but before we even got very far, a silver Wicked Fist slammed through the bottom of the plane. "Jeanne!" Bayonetta snapped.

"Is she insane! She has to be on the plane, too, so if she takes it down, she'll go down with it! Besides that, there's innocent people on here!" I said angrily.

[It's a low security cargo plane. Most likely, the only people on the plane are the pilots, who more than likely have parachutes in case an emergency evacuation is necessary.]

"Finally SOME good news today!" I said.

"Keep moving!" Bayonetta said, the two of us hurrying through the plane, avoiding more Wicked Fists and Wicked Kicks. We quickly dispatched a pair of Applauds with our pistols and hurried ahead, when suddenly, a silver Gomorrah burst through the ground as I was jumping to the next section, roaring and, slamming its head into me, sending me flying back to Bayonetta's feet, snapping at us. "She's annoyingly determined today." Bayonetta grumbled.

I growled as I got back to my feet. "I'll deal with this! I have learned that the only way to defeat a dragon made of hair... is to BURN it!" I said, hitting the beast with a fireball, causing it to retreat.

[Didn't you say something like that last chapter?]

"It's called a running gag." I explained.

"Good work. Now let's go!" She said as we continued to move, dodging a few more Wicked Fists until we managed to reach and enter a portal to the Gates of Hell.

* * *

"Well, well, you two are looking a little worse for wear." He said was we entered the bar.

"That crazy Jeanne chick is trying to bring down a plane with all of us on it." I said.

"And the little one is missing. I need to get to her." Bayonetta said.

"Is that so? Well, since you've been such great customers, I think I might have something for ya." He said, handing Bayonetta 2 pairs of futuristic pistol that almost looks like Star Fox fighters, before handing me a staff made of ice, with two sapphire blue softball sized orbs on either end, protected by a dome of 4 spikes that looked like Maleficent's horns, so it could be used to both smack/smash and stab.

 **Permafrost: A demon who lurked in the deepest, darkest reaches of hell, freezing the air up to 5 miles around itself and waiting for anyone unfortunate enough to be lost in the horrific darkness to weaken and freeze from his torturous ability, before feasting on them. Now sealed within this staff, his icy terror lives on, freezing enemies upon touch and able to send out waves or beams of ice from a distance. No foe is safe from its icy grip.**

"Excellent work as always, Rodin. I think we'll have a nice surprise for anyone in our way now." Bayonetta said, taking the guns.

I grabbed the staff and steam instantly rose from my hand as I felt my whole body quickly dropping to 300 degrees from my natural 500. "Oh, this baby will DEFINITELY do the trick." I said with a smirk.

[Fire and Ice. A devastating combo it's a crime Pokemon doesn't have yet.]

"Do me proud and put on a good show with my babies." He said as we turned to leave.

"That sounds like a COOL idea." I said with a smirk as we left.

* * *

We reappeared in the plane and rushed ahead, breaking through the door to the next area and jumping down to move forward, when suddenly, the cargo hold opened, pouring out numerous shipping containers that slammed into us and knocked us out of the plane. "Hurry!" Bayonetta said.

"Don't have to tell me twice!" I said as we used Witch/Bullet time to slow the fall of the containers and jump from one to the other until we got back onto the plane, where we were immediately greeted by a Grace and Glory. I rushed at the Grace, dodging its fiery claws and slamming one end of my new staff down on its head, leaving a nice, big frozen circle around the area of impact, stunning it and allowing me to hit it in its left side, again freezing the area around where the staff hit, then its right shoulder, before I stabbed the angel in the chest, completely freezing its body and ripping the staff out with enough force to shatter the angel completely.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta wasted no time and rushed in on the Glory and smashing it to the ground with a Wicked Fist, then slamming it into the wall with a Wicked Kick, before firing a devastating beam that put a massive hole in the beast's chest, killing it instantly. The barrier was destroyed and we moved ever so slightly forward, before another one appeared, along with 3 Applauds, Bayonetta unleashing a laser fueled hell on the two on the center and left, hitting them with a barrage of small lasers from the guns on her feet, as well as a trio of Wicked Fists, before finishing them with a powerful beam from the two guns in her hand while I aimed my staff at the rightmost angel and shot a beam of ice from it, completely freezing its body, jumping forward, spinning the staff above my head like a helicopter blade and slamming it down on the angel, shattering it.

"Nice. Katana's always saying how useful her ice powers are. I'm starting to think she has a point." I said, flourishing the staff.

"Indeed. I'm looking forward to putting some more holes in angels with these babies." Bayonetta said, kissing one of the guns, before we ran ahead. After apparently coming to a dead end, Bayonetta looked around and smashed out open an exit hatch, some strange wheel or circle structure on the plane leading to another hatch on the other side of the plane. We jumped onto the circle and hurried ahead, but before we could reach the hatch and enter the plane, a familiar voice called out and stopped us.

"Back to your old self, are we?" Jeanne called out from her and Damion's position above us, the two of them standing on some weird, giant antennae or pole, leaning against the part that continued to extend above them

"I'll give you credit. Jumping onto a plane and staying on after everything we've done to throw you off. You're both impressively and annoyingly persistent." Damion said.

"Yeah, well, you know... It gets your heart pumping. Especially when we get the chance to make the hearts of the assholes throwing us off the plane stop pumping." I snapped.

"Surely you two have some place better to be than to impede us!" Bayonetta said, glaring deeply at them.

"Why so glum? Something troubling you?" Jeanne asked teasingly

"Only your constant fretting over my state of affairs. I've no time to play games with you." Bayonetta countered.

"No need to take out your stress on me, Bayonetta. It's clear you're worried for the girl." Jeanne said with a smirk.

Bayonetta turned and growled at this, lunging towards Jeanne. Damion attempted to intercept her with a pair of menacing 9 ring broadswords, the back of the blade covered in ridges and razor sharp hooks, one for each ring. However, I slammed into him, knocking him back as I locked blades with him, his broadswords against Masamune and Murasama. This allowed Bayonetta to try to land a kick on Jeanne, who dodged, the kick instead hitting and taking off the rest of the... antennae or whatever it was they were on. Jeanne slid down the pole, firing at Bayonetta all the while. Bayonetta dodged the bullets, but Jeanne's eyes suddenly glowed, the last bullet, about to harmlessly whiz by Bayonetta's head, suddenly turned and flew at her again, forcing her to dodge.

During this, Damion and I were in a stand-off, wildly slashing and slicing at each other while intercepting the others attack, before we both eventually threw caution and blocking to the wind and stabbed each other in the chest with both blades, each of coughing out a huge gush of blood. "Why are you doing this?! What do you gain from stopping us! There's a little girl's life on the line here!" I snapped.

"Hers isn't the only one." Damion said before we kicked off of each other, separating and pulling our blades out of the others chest at the same time.

[Hey, weren't there rings on those swords before?]

I looked closer and found what Shuya meant: the rings on his swords were gone. He suddenly smirked at this as a bunch of tiny, but devastating explosions rang out through my body, the rings somehow having came off the sword, moving through my body and detonating, sending me collapsing to the floor.

Jeanne continued to shoot as Bayonetta rushed towards her, activating panther within and rushing towards her Umbran counterpart, becoming a swarm of bats to dodge the bullet and reform behind Jeanne, the two of them dueling in mid-air until the antennae flew towards them, forcing them to separate and dodge, landing on it and briefly fighting, before jumping off and landing on the wing, both witches landing beside their respective demon partner. "Sai!" Bayonetta said worriedly.

"I'm... Fine... The bastard got lucky, that's all. He's got some dirty tricks up his sleeve." I said, slowly getting back to my feet.

[You should thank every god you know of you're a demon with an incredible healing factor.]

(I do that every day.) I confirmed in thought.

She sighed in relief as I recovered, before glaring back at Jeanne. "Tell me where she is. Now." Bayonetta demanded.

"My, aren't we attached to our precious little one? Do you like it when she calls you 'Mummy'?" Jeanne taunted.

"You're absolutely delusional. If I leave her, he'll never shut up about it. And his whining is twice as irritating as anything the child could muster." Bayonetta lied.

Jeanne laughed at this. "You've quite the tongue when it comes to curling round the truth." She taunted.

"And what about you? What are you hiding?" Bayonetta countered, throwing Jeanne the small statue. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think these might mean something to you." She questioned.

Jeanne gasped as she looked at the statue, then paused. "I've no need for worthless junk." She said, tossing the statue aside.

"You broke your poker face, Jeanne. You know something. Now spill whatever it is, along with where Cereza is, before I break your regular face!" I snapped.

"You'll have to get passed me for that." Damion said.

"Why must you needlessly stumble and stall? Have you forgotten the task with which you have been charged? Make haste, for the era of the Creator approaches!" Sapientia ordered.

"I am well aware of my task! But you have forgotten that I do not need your help!" She snapped, jumping onto and stomping on the angel's head, jumping back onto the plane. Unfortunately, the angry angel retaliated with a fireball that damaged the plane, sending it into a nose-dive.

"No! Damn you!" I snapped, charging the Umbran in red, but Damion again intercepted, slicing at my face with his broadswords, forcing me to lean back, then jumped back as he sliced at my legs, before lunging after me.

"It seems your little friend is gone forever." She said as fog began to engulf her, at which point she fired at Bayonetta, who easily dodged the bullets and lunged at the younger Umbran, creating a spear of ice from the moisture in the clouds, flinging it at Jeanne, who nimbly dodged, but was unable to avoid Bayonetta slamming into her.

"Fill them! Fill your eyes with hatred. Accept your violent fate! Accept it and earn the Left Eye! Prove you deserve it!" She challenged.

She attempted to strike Jeanne, before time seemed to freeze for her. (Fear not my child, for no harm will come to you. I'm always watching over you... My dear, sweet child.) Bayonetta heard the voice in her head again. Time restarted and Jeanne recovered, smashing our titular witch into the floor, sending her completely through it, only for her to burst back out a few moments later. She adjusted her glasses with her gun as Jeanne casually advanced, Damion landing beside her as I rejoined Bayonetta.

 **Background Music: "The Animal I Have Become" by Three Days Grace**

Bayonetta dodged as Jeanne did a strange jumping cartwheel attack, then dodged again as Jeanne came down with a diving kick, managing to blast her with a few beams from Bazillions, before she recovered and launched Bayonetta into the air with a Wicked Kick from below. She then rushed in as Bayonetta landed, cutting her a few times with her own katana, Angel Slayer. She charged up to deal a fatal blow to Bayonetta, but she recovered at the last minute and met the katana with her own, the two blades locked together, before Bayonetta managed to push her back, landing several slashes and a couple of kicks with Lt. Kilgore to knock the younger witch back.

Meanwhile, Damion and I locked blades once again, separating and unleashing a barrages of hacks and slashes from the two blades, countering each other each time, before I switched to Asmodeus and blasted him away with an energy-filled King of Hearts. "Impressive. You've been building your arsenal. But so have I." He said, a pair of gloves with needle-like talons on the end appearing on his hands.

"Nice accessories, but they can only hurt if they can reach me!" I said, flinging the rest of the cards in my hand. But then, he simply stretched his hand out and the cards stopped in mid-air, surrounded by green energy, before shrinking into marble-sized balls of energy. "Oh." I said, before he suddenly shot the balls of energy at me. "Oh, shit!" I said, diving out of the way, the energy balls just missing, exploding in a small trail behind me. I checked the bottom of my deck and thankfully, the cards he turned into energy balls still came back to the bottom of the deck. "Nice. I was worried I'd be a few cards short." I said.

"When I'm done with you, you'll be a few organs short!" Damion snapped, rushing in with a terrifying scythe, made from a black spine and ribcage with a dragon's skull at the end, with its mouth opened for two menacing black scythe blades to come from, which he now swung at me. I drew Diesectomy and swung it, slicing the blades off and swinging it at Damion, who jumped back just in time to only receive a decently large cut from the massive scalpel instead of being sliced in half. But before I could smirk, black flames came from the dragon skull's mouth and the blades reformed.

Bayonetta and Jeanne had re-engaged each other, matching each other move for move, before Bayonetta managed to unleash a barrage of kick on Jeanne, backing it up each time with a rocket from Lt. Kilgore, eventually knocking her back with a Wicked Kick. Jeanne recovered and skidded back a few feet, before summoning her motorcycle. "That's cheating!" Bayonetta said, dodging as Jeanne zoomed by her, activating Witch Time and hitting the bike several times before Jeanne drove out of range.

She repeated this process two or three more times while dodging Jeanne's bullets, finally destroying the bike and sending Jeanne tumbling. "Fine. We'll do it your way!" She said, rushing back in.

Back with us, Damion lunged at me, the two of us almost doing a dance as we dodged each other's weapons and struck at each other, neither one managing to reach the other. Eventually, I switched to Frostbite, freezing his feet to the ground, landing several hits on him and knocking him back, before firing a number of ice spears at him. But then, he pulled out a bow and arrow with nightmarish blades running down it, spinning it and destroying the icicles, before readying an arrow that looked a screaming woman, her hair splitting into 4 points. He shot the arrow at me, which I created an ice wall to stop, but it stuck in the wall, before a scream rang out and shattered the wall, sending me flying back. "Give up. I have a counter for every weapon you can break out." He said.

We traded several blows with several different weapons and indeed found ourselves at a stalemate, before I remembered something. "Let's see you counter this!" I said, drawing Kamaitachi and spraying on the cologne that goes with it, adding the same peacock-like feathers that make up the fan to my coat, spinning as I approached, disorienting Damion and allowing me to land several powerful hits, before blasting him back with one final, powerful hit, backed up by a typhoon-like gust of wind that sent him flying back into the wall of the plane.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta and Jeane were again trading several blows, Jeanne managing to get a few more cuts against Bayonetta, before she dodged and countered, knocking Jeanne down with a Wicked Stomp, charging up to finish her with a final Wicked Kick, but the red-clad Umbra dodged, rushing in and hitting Bayonetta with a jumping backflip kick, followed by several more backflips while hitting Bayonetta with a number of bullets, before a Wicked Kick slammed her back to the ground. Both equally tired, they rushed in, each throwing one more kick, their legs colliding, causing them to unleash a massive flurry of back-up kicks, but Bayonetta finally pulled through and countered with a devastating final kick.

 **End Music**

With that final kick, Bayonetta sent Jeanne flying back and hitting the ground alongside Damion as I blasted him back with Kamaitachi. "Now's our chance, let's go!" I said to Bayonetta, hurrying ahead.

"Cereza!" Bayonetta said worriedly, rushing off after me.

Jeanne and Damion tried to give chase, but were stopped by her angelic overseer. "Not yet. She isn't ready." Jeanne to Sapientia.

"Dammit... I failed again... But I won't next time!" Damion promised.

* * *

We dropped back down into the plane, which had now crashed down. It must have crashed into some large body of water, as water was now flooding in, some of the damaged wiring touching and electrifying the water.

"Oh, great! Water that's electrified. So it can hurt me even more! I'm just so lucky today!" I said, annoyed.

"All the more reason to find Cereza!" Bayonetta said as we rushed ahead. We moved forward, Bayonetta using Raven Within to carefully traverse the electrified room as I precariously flew through the room, doing my absolute best not to get with with rogue bolts of electricity. We soon reached a safe area and re-entered the human world from Purgatorio, looking around for the child. "Little one! Where are you!? Little one! Can you hear me!?" Bayonetta called.

"Cereza, can you hear us? Speak up, kid!" I called.

A nearby door opened and a terrified Cereza peeked out. "Mummy! Mummy! Mummy!" Cereza cried.

"Cereza!" Bayonetta said, relieved.

"Mummy! I was so scared." Cereza said fearfully, running up and hugging the Umbran Witch.

"No crying now, little one. You know the rules - No cockroaches or crying babies." Bayonetta reminded her. The ship began to tear apart even more, shaking apart and filling with more water. Bayonetta picked up Cereza and held her close."Time to go, little one. Hold on tight, OK?" Bayonetta instructed.

"Okay." Cereza confirmed.

"Sai. I'm counting on you. I trust you know what to do?" She asked.

"I'm on it. You just worry about getting out of here. I'll deal with the angelic assholes." I said, spinning Frostbite around, before holding it in a ready position as we moved ahead.

A trio of Affinities was the first to block our way. I spun my staff around and held it like I was making a shot in pool, repeatedly jabbing outwards at the closest angel, repeatedly hitting it in the torso and eventually freezing its whole body after the ice spread, spinning my staff and smacking it into the frozen angel, shattering it. I then fired a couple of quick, small beams of ice from one of the staff's orbs, freezing the other two angel's feet to the ground, spinning it again and creating a blade of frozen air from the orb on the other side of the staff, shattering the angel's feet, sending them to the ground, allowing me to stab one end of the staff into each of their head, spinning it fast and hard enough to rip their heads off.

Next was a pair of Affinities and an Applaud. I froze one Affinity with another ice beam, stabbing and freezing the other and smashing him into the other, shattering them both, before smacking the Applaud into the air, hitting him with a few aerial attacks, before smacking him back into the water, frying him. We proceeded just a bit further, almost reaching the room we first re-entered the ship in, but then a trio of Affinities and an Applaud appeared to stop off. "Alright, I've lost my patience." I said, stabbing the staff into the ground, ice rapidly spreading and freezing the 4 angels. "Let's see if he likes frozen treats." I said, summoning.

"ZUUL, MOTHAFUCKA!" Zuul roared as he leapt from my summoning portal, snatching the frozen angels up in his maw, instantly shattering them as he crunched on them and consumed them, howling in victory before diving back into his portal.

"That's the last of them. We're home free!" I said as we hurried to the next room.

But apparently today wasn't done screwing with us, as the ship began to break and crumble more and more, even breaking in half, the back half of the ship, which we were in, starting to sink. This almost sent us back down into the electrified water. Fortunately the moon was out, allowing Bayonetta to cling to the wall and I'm a badass demon already capable of defying gravity in 3 different ways, the current particular way being using my demon energy to cling to the wall. Unfortunately, the back end was now sinking even faster. "Sai, I hope you're feeling fast tonight!" Bayonetta said.

I always did work best under pressure." I said as we ran ahead, only to be stopped just before we could reach the non-sinking half of the ship by a barrier and quartet of Harmonies. I spun the staff above my head like a helicopter blade once again, this time creating a dozen foot long ice arrows, which I then launched at one of the Harmonies, freezing it, which allowed me to jump up and shatter it, before turning to the next one, hitting it several times in the air, freezing it as well, knocking it to the ground, which it also shattered against. As I began to descend from the air, I swung the staff and created another blade of frozen air, hitting and freezing the third Harmony just as I landed on the ground, causing it to fall from the sky, impaling itself on my staff after I moved under it. I then backflipped, kicking and shattering the angel.

I then grabbed my staff and threw it into the final stingray angel, completely freezing it, about to fall to the ground, before I caught it and ripped the staff out, taking a large chunk of the angel's body with it, yet managing onto to break the living frozen statue. But still, that was more than enough to destroy the creature, which vanished in a flash of light and halos, the barrier going down with its defeat. "Alright, let's go!" I said, jumping to the upper half of the plane. Bayonetta ran in to make the jump, but just at that moment, the moon was blocked by some clouds, cutting off her ability to stick to the walls. "No!" I shouted, reaching back for her, grabbing her hand. "I gotcha." I said.

"And to think I ever doubted you." She said with a smile as I pulled her up, just as the back half of the plane completely snapped off and sank. She walked out to see our surroundings as I watched the back half sink. She was a bit surprised at first, but then smirked. "Sai, dear? I think you should come see this. I don't think you'll be very pleased." She said.

"What is it? It can't be too bad, right? We're just in a big lake or some-" I said as I looked out, seeing that we were in the middle of the ocean, the one place worse for me than Paradiso. "SON OF A BITCH!" I shouted angrily.

* * *

 **Damion's Weapons (so far):  
**

 **(old/already seen)**

 **Bloodshot: These cursed guns, the famous weapons of a legendary clan of both demon and vampire bloodlines, bestowed with the names Scar, Oblivion , Doom and Fate, these guns bring out a vampire's bloodlust and a demon's fury, sending Damion on a war path even the greatest armies couldn't hope to survive.  
**

 **Fissure: Made from a giant who cracked the very Earth as we walked, this massive blade has the power to create devastating Earthquakes and could even shatter a mountain with a great enough strike.  
**

 **Heartseeker: After being attacked by a foolish and proud alien hunter, Damion took note of its advanced technology and perfected it into these deadly weapons, blades on his arms to slice apart anything in his way and vaporizing any foe attempting to escape or strike him from a distance  
**

 **(new, debuted this chapter)**

 **Pain and Remorse: Also known as "The Jaws of Eternal Struggles", these deadly blades feast on their wielders suffering and regret, becoming stronger the more turmoil their owner is in. They also force a sense of loneliness and inability to forgive upon their owner to further fuel their own strength.  
**

 **Plague: A cruel, sly demon who took pleasure in stealing an opponent's attack and making it his own, now rests within these frightening claws, turning projectiles or weak would-be attackers into bolts of energy to use at their wielder's pleasure.  
**

 **Razorsong: A beautiful, but arrogant singer scorned by her true love cut him down. Now sealed within this bow, her deadly blades slice with vicious envy and her screaming arrows will pierce any in their way.  
**

 **Dracotaclysm: Once a dragon that feasted on souls, this scythe has the power to tear the souls away from its victims bodies, empowering it to do more catastrophic damage. When it absorbs enough souls it is believed to possess the true rage of a dragon.  
**


	13. Sai Overboard!

We stood on the wing of the sinking aircraft, looking around for any escape. Sure, I could fly, but they couldn't and I wouldn't leave them behind. Luckily, a helicopter flew in above us and Luka dove out, landing on the wing with his grapple still attached to reel us back up. "Let's go!" He said, reaching out to us.

"Luka! You came through!" I said happily.

[I told you there was a reason to keep him around!]

But before we could reach him, there was a huge splash in the distance, like something massive jumping out of the water. Bayonetta looked at me and nodded, before holding Cereza out to Luka. "Mummy! Mummy!" Cereza cried as she was handed to Luka.

"It's OK, little one, I'll be right back." Bayonetta said, drawing her guns and stepping into a portal to Purgatorio.

I sighed, knowing I'd have to fight where I'd be in the most danger I could possibly be in, before smirking. "Okay, I guess we're doing this now." I said, stepping through to Purgatorio as well.

[Fighting in your greatest weakness. Gotta give you credit for bravery.]

"Mummy! Mummy!" She cried as she was whisked to the chopper with the reporter.

We saw something cutting through the water at high speeds, before lunging out at us and attacking, destroying the wing of the plane and forcing us to jump to a new platform. _**"The woman fled so swiftly. I am reminded why we have come to rely upon the unreliable nature of humanity."**_ The angel said, now standing on the water in front of us to reveal itself: a giant lizard with wings and an upside-down shark head with horns and no eyes. " _ **A valuable lesson, but not my purpose." It prattled on, annoying Bayonetta, who grabbed a nearby pole. "I have come to evaluate you and determine whether you are worthy of your role in the resurrection of the Creator, Jubileus."**_ Sapentia said, before Bayonetta threw the pole, keeping its mouth open and stopping it from talking more.

"I don't know what this guy's saying, but he's sounding like a DC villain, SO long-winded." I said.

[There's being menacing, then there's just being annoying.]

Bayonetta smirked at her silencing of the angel, licking her finger and touching her hip, making a hissing noise like steam. "Another talkative type. I don't think I've got time to entertain your blather. I'd much rather hear it straight from your boss." Bayonetta said.

The angel appeared to laugh at this. _**"You speak of our "boss"!? The resurrection 500 years ago fell victim to his human ineptitude, and we were unable to revive the Creator. However, I must thank the Sage for his witch hunts. His impetus eradicated a vile clan from this Earth."**_ The angel explained.

"The witch hunts?" Bayonetta asked.

"Well, sorry to tell you, buddy, but Witch hunting season is over. Now it's angel season!" I said, leaping towards the angel, a blue fireball in each hand, before a massive jet of water rose from nowhere and slammed into me, sending me back to the wing with Bayonetta.

"Sai!" She said worriedly as we looked up to see who did that as he stood on the angel's head.

It was a guy with ocean blue eyes and hair, short and unkempt in the front while flowing wildly in the back. He wore a long, sleeveless, incredibly worn and tattered black trench coat with long, claw fingered gloves that went halfway up his upper arm, blue tattered pants with the left leg ripped off below the knee and shoes that looked like 3-toed dragon feet. "No, no, no, Cousin! That isn't right! It's Sai season! And the only Sai here is-" He started, before gasping and pointing at me. "You." He finished, laughing maniacally. He was voiced by Chris Parson, the voice of Junkrat.

[Oh, this guy...]

"Raijin!" I snapped. (Rye-Jean)

"That's me, alright! Dear old Daddy's been getting pretty mad at you ruining all our plans and killing my siblings, so he sent me in. You know, the guy who has powers over water, your exact weakness! Should've thought of it sooner, really. And they say I'M crazy!" He said, laughing again.

"Why are you doing this, Raijin?! You like humans! You love watching all the crazy shit they do!" I said.

"Yeah, but Pops doesn't like them and wants to enslave them. And he's one guy you don't piss off. I'm not THAT crazy! I don't want him to smack me around like he did Shuya! I have common sense!" He said.

[Dick.]

"Is your entire family this insane?" Bayonetta asked.

"He's the craziest one. And he's about to be done. Because now it's Raijin season!" I said.

"Only if you can get through my water!" He shouted, throwing a wrecking-ball sized water sphere at me.

"I have learned that the only way to defeat water... Is to BURN IT!" I said, creating a beach ball-sized fireball in my hands and launching it at the sphere, evaporating it into steam.

[Okay, seriously. Are you trying to put that on a shirt or something?]

"I've done the joke 3 times. It can now be retired.

 _ **"Thanks to his efforts, this town has become a source of strength and we've gained a foothold strong enough to orchestrate the Creator's resurrection. All that remains is awakening the Left Eye, and uniting the Eyes of the World. Then the new era of creation shall arrive!"**_ Sapentia said, striking our platform and shattering it, forcing us to jump onto and surf on pieces of scrap.

"Come on, Sai! Come and play in the big boy pool!" Raijin taunted, following me on his own personal water spout.

"If I must, then I must." I said, clasping my hands together. "Oh, merciful Suijin, take pity on this demonic mariner." I pleaded to the god of water, readying myself for the fight.

 **Background Music: "Maelstrom" from The Pirates of The Caribbean**

Bayonetta surfed around the angel as it slowly chased after her, firing fireballs and energy beams from the small angel faces on its legs. Bayonetta dodged the assault and activated Witch Time, attacking the monster's front right leg with Durga, unleashing a flurry of Wicked Fists that clawed and smacked the leg's weak point, destroying the angel face just as Witch Time ended, heading to the right rear leg, dodging more energy beams and even some missiles, freezing time once again and using the moment to destroy the face on the rear leg, causing the angel to dive below the surface.

Meanwhile, I was surfing on my own piece of debris, using Ghostshade to fire waves and beams of darkness at Raijin, who fired back a me with giant water fists or grenades from his gauntlets. He sent a huge wave at me, but I used a fireball to punch a hole through it just big enough for me to safely pass through, jumping up at Raijin and slicing at him several times, jumping back and shooting my hands forward, blasting him back with a basketball-sized dark fireball from both swords.

Back with Bayonetta, she surfed around, waiting for the angel to make its move, before it snapped at her from below like a Great White Shark breaching the water to snatch prey, forcing her to dodge. It fell back beneath the surface and chased after her, snapping at her again, before swimming along the surface with its fin slicing through the water like a shark, leaping from a distance and lunging at her, forcing her to dodge, crashing back under the waves, before leaping out and standing on the water again. She switched to Shuraba and went for the left front like, dodging more attacks to activate Witch Time and sliced the angel's face all to hell, destroying it and moving onto the rear face, dodging attacks and freezing time, finishing that leg off as well.

"IASTA SA PIADPH! - (Framed in the depths of my jaws!)" She announced in Enochian, summoning the massive spider demon Phantasmaraneae, terrifying the cowardly angel, who attempted to flee, but Bayonetta jumped on his back and summoned a pair of Hekatoncheir's fists to punch it in the face and grab its wings, steering it back to the waiting arachnid, who chomped down on its face and destroyed its horns and exposing a new weak spot on the angel's chin: another small angel face with a futuristic laser visor. With its job temporarily done, the massive spider retreated back to its portal.

As this was happening, Raijin bombarded me with jets of water and a number of grenades, until I was able to activate Bullet Time, leaping into the air and slicing at him several times with Diesectomy, his powerful healing factor managing to keep him in one piece as the mighty scalpel sliced through him, before I switched to Permafrost and froze him, spinning and slamming the staff down on him with all the force I could, shattering the ice, which cut him like glass as I knocked him back down into the water.

Returning to Bayonetta, She dodged a massive fireball from the angel's mouth, before attacking the Cyclops wannabe angel face on its chin. After a few hits it leapt back, then dove below the surface, attacking her from below once again and lunging at her from the surface, but she once again dodged every attack. It leapt back onto the surface and faced her directly once more, but she continued to dodge and attack the angel, smacking it around with ease.

Raijin managed to knock me back and noticed the angel being completely outmatched and sighed. "Ugh. Dad's as crazy as I am for relying on these helo-wearing pushovers. Oh well, you want a problem solved right... SHOOT GRENADES AT IT!" He laughed, rushing in and firing grenades at Bayonetta, who was forced to dodge and desperately surf around and away from the huge explosions around her.

"Oh, no, you don't!" I said, rushing in after him. Sapientia lunged at me, but I unloaded on him with Doomspore, the massive onslaught of bullets pushing him back and to the side just enough to miss me, before I rushed back as Bayonetta managed to turn around and land a few slashes on Raijin, before I swept in and sliced down with Diesectomy from the very top of the back of his head all the way down his back, causing him to cry out in pain as his blood to spill into the water, before Bayonetta kicked him away with Lt. Kilgore.

"My, your cousin is rather rude, cutting in like that." She said.

"Well, hopefully he learned his lesson: cut IN and get cut UP." I said, before the angel suddenly lunged at us again. "And now this guy's gotta learn it!" I said, one masterful slice from my scalpel naginata destroying the face on its chin, causing it to rear back in pain.

Bayonetta used the opportunity to once again summon Phantasm and Hekatoncheir, steering the angel back towards the spider, who broke off even more of its head crest stuff and the two might fists ripping its wings off, turning it into an unimpressive lizard compared to its former self. This finally enraged the demon, who roared furiously and dove into the water, spinning rapidly and creating a massive whirlpool and dove into it, waiting for Bayonetta, challenging her to come after it.

Back with us, Raijin had recovered and was now furious. "Okay, Sai! You want things to get bloody?! Then let's get bloody!" He said, pulling out one of the flying head angels and biting into it, ravenously drinking its blood. He screamed in pain as his body began to mutate, before finally turning into a massive squid, his body still visible in the squid's mantle (Google squid anatomy). "Squids are very dangerous, Sai! Let me show you!" He said, lashing his tentacles out at me.

"I've dealt with a squid way worse than you, buddy! And now he's a pair of gauntlets!" I said, referring to my Kraken gauntlets.

Elsewhere, Bayonetta accepted the angel's challenge and surfaced down into the whirlpool, meeting the angel and fighting it head on, before it created a huge gust of wind, pushing her back to the top of the whirlpool as it now unleashed its arsenal from the safety of the bottom of the pit. Bayonetta dodged the angel's many lasers and closing the distance, fighting it head on once again. It snapped and clawed at her for all it was worth, but she dodged every one of its attacks and whittled down whatever energy it had left to fight with.

"IASTA SA PIADPH!" She announced once last time, summoning the massive spider below the angel, greatly and immediately expanding the whirlpool, so fast even the angel fell off the wall it was clinging to. It screamed in panic and flailed desperately to grab onto something and avoid its fate, but to no avail as it plummeted down onto the black spider web below, dozens of smaller spiders, although still easily the size of the reptilian angel appeared from nowhere and all gathered around and piled on top of the angel, tearing it to shreds and consuming it, leaving only its head behind with a broken jaw as the main Phantasm cried out in victory and disappeared back to Inferno.

Meanwhile, I dodged water jets from Raijin's beak and his tentacles as he swung them at me horizontally to tried to smash them down on me vertically. I sliced them off after dodging them, but they'd almost immediately grow back. "Damn. I'll have to get in close and go for his body!" I said, surfing towards the mighty beast, dodging and slicing off more and more tentacles as I closed in on him. When I was close enough, he snapped at me with his beak over and over at lightning speeds, almost faster than I can blink. "I think it's time to shut your mouth, Raijin!" I snapped, dodging his beak one more time and slicing it off, causing him to shriek and flail in pain.

 _"Unagi!"_ I announced in Japanese, a massive snake like head passing under us, before the water beneath us completely turned black. Suddenly, a titanic eel rose from the depths with a furious roar, wrapping its head around the fins and mantle of the squid, wrapping tighter and tighter before crushing it in an explosion of blood, then bit and tore off the head and tentacles of the squid, tossing it into the air, where a second set of jaws shot from the eels mouth, grabbing the head and tentacles and pulling them down the eel's throat. It roared and disappeared back into the portal I summoned it from, leaving the rest of the squid's crushed and mangled body, which tore away from Raijin's out mutilated body, sinking into the depths below, leaving Raijin to float almost lifelessly on the surface. (Unagi means "eel" in Japan. It would've given it away if I translated it before the creature showed up)

 **End Music**

I surfed up to and looked down sadly at the remains of Raijin. "I wish we could've avoided this, cousin, but I can't let your father reach his goals." I told him.

"I don't blame ya. Guy's a dick. I'd feel dirty dying for him if I could still feel anything." He said, still chuckling a bit.

[My dear brother... Is their anything you can do for him?]

(One thing... maybe. As long as you don't mind having a roommate.) I replied in thought.

There was a short pause before... [Does this mean I have to move the pool table?]

I was a bit shocked at this. (When did you get a- I almost fell for that.)

I suddenly heard the sound of a break as pool balls connected and scattered. [Fell for what?]

I sighed at this, shaking my head. "You don't have to die for him. You can join with me and we'll stop him with our powers combined. And we can watch humanity grow and prosper together... And still laugh at the stupid shit they do." I said wit a smirk at the end.

He laughed at this. "Ya had me at not dying' for him. Guess you know how it works by now?" He asked.

"Of course." I said, putting my hand on his chest.

"Almost good. Little lower." He said, smirking again.

"Yeah, not falling for it." I said.

"Eh. Can't blame a guy for trying. Fuse!" He said, his body vanishing.

I felt a familiar surge of power and looked at my body, feeling the new strength filling my veins. "Whoa. This power's the real deal. Zeidan's got nothing on us now." I said, expecting a reply from one or both of them. (Hello? Got REAL quiet...) I said, before suddenly brightening with hope. "Holy crap, are they finally-!" I started, before hearing barely held laughter, to which I sighed. "Of course not." I said.

AHAHAHAHA! Oh come on, Sai! Don't be like that! Hey, maybe a nice chant will make you feel better! Raijin taunted in my head.

"Shut up!" I snapped.

[Oh, come on, if it feels right, then do it.]

[You can win! You feel great! You! Can! Do! This!] They chanted together.

"Knock it off already! Raijin! What do I get from this?" I asked.

Oh! Me, right! Well, you can now mix water with your fire and make steam, or shoot out a mist like the stuff that comes out of fire extinguishers!

[Wait, that doesn't make sense, that's not how fire extinguishers work-]

Nobody asked you! Oh and now you get waterbender powers and can heal people! Your weakness to water is... Not gone, but weaker than it was before, too! And just like Shuya, you can tap into my full power for 5 minutes at the cost of your fire power, but you won't be able to use 'em again for 24 hours.  


"Nice. Bring it on, then, Zeidan! Nothing's bringing me down now!" I snapped, raising a fist to the sky.

Oh, by the way, there's a wave coming.

"Wait, what?!" I asked, turning to see a 50 foot wall of water coming down on me. "Curse you, merciful Suijin!" I shouted before the wave knocked me underwater.

Ha! Futurama reference!

* * *

Bayonetta looked down at the defeated head of the angel, holding the Umbran Watch on her chest with a finger over the stone inside it. "I have no idea why you would want this stone. It would look absolutely terrible on you. Much too flashy." Bayonetta taunted.

 _ **"Stone? You think this is all about some worthless rock!? May Jubileus, the Creator, grace you!"**_ Sapentia laughed as it was dragged to Inferno.

* * *

I rejoined Bayonetta and we quickly surfed upwards as the whirlpool began to return to normal, the water shooting us upwards as we returned to the human world and entered the chopper just before Luka. "Welcome aboard, Cheshire." Bayonetta said teasingly.

"Surprise!" I said.

"Oh, fucking hell!" Luka screamed, almost falling out of the plane.

[He's STILL not expecting it by now?]

Oh, my such language on that one! And in front of a child! For shame!

"Mummy!" Cereza cheered, running to Bayonetta and hugging her.

"I told you I'd be right back." Bayonetta said, looking at the girl with a smile, before turning to Luka. "Shouldn't you be, you know, flying this thing? I'm a bit occupied at the moment." She said, holding Cereza. Luka quickly scrambled to the controls as the water shot upwards once again, rocking the plane a bit, causing Cereza to scream.

"Luka, gotta tell ya, buddy. You're flying? It ain't getting no 5 star review." I told him.

"Well, so much for the subtle approach. We might as well have speakers on this thing blaring Ride of the fucking Valkyries." Luka grumbled.

"Come now. We're VIPs. You know, nothing says you've made it in life like a private helicopter." Bayonetta said with a smirk.

"Yay!" Cereza said.

"Yeah, each member of my family has their own chopper. Mine's an Apache." I said.

The only thing more powerful than a young child's wish!

[An absolute death machine.]

"Then welcome aboard Air Luka Flight 001. This is your captain, LUKA, speaking. Fasten your safety belts as this may be a bumpy flight." Luka announced like a pilot on a commercial plane as we flew closer to the massive tower in the city of Isla Del Sol.

* * *

 **Abaia: A giant, magical eel that lives and patrols the river Oceanus, Hell's greatest river than some believe even connects to the human world. It considers all other creatures in the river its children and protects them furiously from those who would harm them. It has beaten fisherman to death with its tail, crushed fishing boats with its body and spewed enough water to drown a small fishing village.  
**


	14. A Rivalry is Ended

"You're really not going to like what comes next. I hope you know that." Luka warned.

"Don't tell me. Air Cheshire has awful in-flight entertainment and horrendous food?" Bayonetta guessed.

"Think about it. Those things that downed the jet aren't just going to let us land on their island. You think we can just say 'Hey, we're here!' and they'll bring us a cake?" He asked.

"Hey, we've handled them up to this point, what makes now any different?" I've asked.

"Roses are red, violets are blue and there's always someone that's better than you." He recited.

I narrowed my eyes at this. "I'mma kick your ass." I said.

He scoffed at this. "Things look good from up here. But the further down you go the harder it is to not notice the reality... of things." He said as he looked at and then stared at Bayonetta's boobs, becoming lost in them as we watched either sweat or water roll down them, much to Cereza's confusion and my annoyance, as I began looking through my coat for the proper weapon to smack him upside the head with.

"Cheshire. Look." Bayonetta said, looking ahead.

"Oh... I'm lookin'". Luka said, mesmerized.

"No, you're not, you fucker, look up!" I said, punching him in the face, turning his head forward, grabbing the sides of his head for him to see the missiles heading toward the helicopter. "You motherf-" I started.

"Oh, fuck me!" He shouted. The missiles struck the plane, but because we're badasses, Bayonetta and I managed to jump out with Cereza and Luka, Bayonetta hooking Luka to the missile's weird points near the exhaust port as I set the child down behind Bayonetta, letting her cling to her "Mummy's" leg as I made my way to the front of Bayonetta and crouched down in front of her so she could see and steer the missile with her magic.

"Welcome to my fantasy zone. Get ready!" Bayonetta said, creating a magic headset or something as she piloted the missile towards the island.

From there we flew through the skies, Bayonetta firing magic energy bolts to kill any angels and incoming missiles in front of us as I fought off any angel that dared to land on the missile and tried to attack us... Yeah, that's it... Not really much else to say about that part...

Soon enough, we arrived at Isla del Sol and looked at the astounding lights of the city. "It's brilliant, mummy!" Cereza said happily as she gazed at the awe-inspiring city.

Suddenly, we noticed another missile heading straight at us, Jeanne and Damion riding on it. The Witch and Demon jumped off each missile and clashed with their counterpart in mid-air. Bayonetta and Jeanne connecting with and kick and firing several bullets at each other on the way down to a roof with a giant spotlight, separating just before landing as Damion and I grappled in the air and landed several punches, knees and elbows on each other, lighting ourselves on fire and crashing down beside Jeanne.

Damion landed on top and tried to slam both fists down on me, but I hit him with a haymaker to knock him off of me, but before I could get back to my feet, Jeanne kicked me in the side and knocked me down to Bayonetta's feet. "Welcome to Isla del Sol, island of wealth and power!" She greeted us.

"Jeanne!" Bayonetta snapped.

"And trust us, your time here will be to DIE for." Damion said.

"Damion." I growled.

"If you've made it this far, that should be enough. You're back to your old self. This is where we finish what was started so long ago." Jeanne said.

"That's fine and dandy for them, but what do you get out of all of this?" I demanded, looking at Damion.

"A friend of my enemy is also my enemy. Be it Witch, Demon or Sage." Bayonetta warned.

"The Lumen Sages... They were our counterbalance as overseers." Jeanne explained as she set off a pair of missiles. "Between us there was a law that was never to be broken. It stated that 'The intersection of light and dark would bring calamity to this earth.'" She continued, shooting another couple of missiles. "But 500 years ago, a child was born in clear violation of this tenet. That child was you." She finished, shooting off several more missiles behind us.

"500 years ago." Bayonetta said in disbelief.

"Well, you look good for your age." I said.

"Idiot..." Damion scoffed.

"The disaster this caused sent the clans into a spiral of chaos that continues to be felt to this day. You, the half-breed of light and dark, are at the center of that chaos. Allowing you to continue to exist is a danger that cannot be accepted." Jeanne told her.

Suddenly, Bayonetta's eyes widened as she suddenly remembered the last missing piece of her past...

* * *

The scene replayed of the figure in red impaling Bayonetta. "When the Eyes of the World are within our grasp, the power of creation will be awakened. That is why the Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another!" Jeanne declared.

* * *

"The Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! Bayonetta, it is time that this is brought to an end. That you are brought to an end!" Jeanne declared.

"You... You did it." Bayonetta accused.

"It is our charge as witches to protect the treasures of the clan... By any means necessary. Even if it means burning every inch of this island to a crisp." Jeanne said, raising her hand to fire the last of the missiles.

But before she could send them off, Luka zipped in from nowhere and snatched missile remote control from Jeanne. "What?!" Damion snapped, lunging for him, only to be blasted back from a shot from Last Regret.

"Sorry, but I think you've shot enough of those already." I said.

Luka sighed in relief as he was revealed in a yellow jeep. "I'm really beginning to hate missiles. You know, I have no idea what the hell you all got going on here, but you don't mind if I take this off your hands, do ya? Get in, Cerezita." He said, grabbing Cereza.

"Mummy..." She said fearfully as they started to take off. "Mummy!" She cried as they drove off.

Jeanne and Damion tried to chase after them, but Bayonetta and I blocked them, Bayonetta holding Jeanne at gunpoint as I grappled with Damion again. However, their faces of anger soon turned to smirks, hinting to us something was wrong.

"Cheshire!" Bayonetta called, before the car exploded. "Cereza..." She said in fear.

"You... Monsters!" I shouted, headbutting Damion back and rushing for Jeanne, only for her to grab Bayonetta and throw her into me.

"You call us monsters, yet you two are the ones who throw everything into chaos." Jeanne said.

"And for that, you must die!" Damion snapped, rushing in, only to jump back as Rodin suddenly rose from a portal to the Gates of Hell.

"Rodin." Bayonetta and I said together.

"Well, well. Looks like things are really heating up. Good thing I got you these babies." He said, tossing Bayonetta a small silver cylinder, before tossing me two curved ones. Once they hit our hands, however, they suddenly emitted plasma blades like lightsabers, Bayonetta's light green and mine a deep purple.

 **Voiceless: A demoness who lured pour souls to deadly fates with her beautiful voice. She was eventually captured and her voice ripped out, turned into one of these mighty blades, as her body became the other. Together, these devastating weapons will make any target as silent as the demon whose voice and body became them.**

"That's all the help you're getting from me. Now put my babies to good use." He said, vanishing into the portal.

I was a bit surprised, but smirked. "You heard the man. Why don't you help me break these in?" I asked, readying my two blades backhand.

"Well, well. Maybe you'll actually be able to put up a fight this time." Damion said, pulling out and activating a lightsaber with a black blade and cross-guard blades.

"Bayonetta. Time is of the essence. This can wait no longer!" Jeanne declared, pulling out an orange lightsaber and firing off another half dozen missiles.

 **Background Music: "Duel of Fates" by John Williams**

We all rushed in, Bayonetta and Jeanne matching each other move for move as Damion somehow managed to counter all of my attacks, despite only having one lightsaber to compete with my two. I hacked down at him with both blades, to which he blocked with his crossguards, leaving the main blade unimpeded as he began to tilt it forward towards me, forcing me to shoot a fireball from my mouth to blast us both back.

I switched to Doomspore as Damion switched to his Razorsong as I equipped Doomspore and fired on him as he masterfully spun the bow like a staff, deflecting the fire from two miniguns at once. He then slashed my chest with the bow's blade bottom blade, stabbed my stomach twice, before slicing upward with the upper blade, causing me to stagger back, allowing him to blast me back with a charged up arrow.

Bayonetta appeared to have the upper hand, landing a few slashes on Jeane, before the white-haired witch leapt into the air and fired down on her, before dropping down with a powerful axe kick, knocking Bayonetta back. She quickly recovered, but Jaune was immediately on her with another barrage of attacks, each one followed up with a bullet, before she was knocked back with a Wicked Kick. Damion soon joined the assault, Bayonetta struggling to hold the two back, before finally dodging one of Jeanne's attacks and activating Witch Time, landing several kicks and slashes on her Umbran Sister, before knocking her down with a Wicked Stomp.

Time restarted and Damion swiped at her with his bow, but she managed to counter it, leaving the assassin open to a brutal pummeling as she switched to Lt. Kilgore and landed several crushing hits on him, before finally knocking him into a wall and repeatedly blasting him with a pair of rockets. Jeanne recovered and tried to attack Bayonetta once again, but I had also recovered, now fighting with my fans and landing several slashes on her, sending her into the air with a mini tornado, jumping after her and knocking her down with an axe kick, teleporting to the ground below her and sending her flying with a powerful spinning rear kick as Bayonetta knocked Damion to the side with a round kick, causing our adversaries to crash into each other between us.

We re-engaged with our original adversaries and continued to fight, even as the building we were on began to collapse, up until it fell with a great explosion, causing Jeanne's expensive clothing to catch fire, leaving an opening for Bayonetta to kick her away as she tried to put out the fire, launching her back as we all landed on the side of a building. Now nude, Jeanne landed and created a bodysuit from her hair similar to Bayonetta's. "So, she is an Umbran." I said.

"She won't be alive long enough for it to matter." Bayonetta said.

"Bold words. But can you back them up?" Damion asked, equipping his Plague talons. We all rushed in and traded blows once more with our various weapons, Bayonetta whipping at Jeanne with Kulshedra as the silver witch dodged them with her own ice skates, kicking at Bayonetta, who managed to dodge each attack.

Meanwhile, Damion was now using his Plague talons to turn my Asmodeus cards into orbs of green energy. "I think we already did this song and dance on the plane." He smirked as the orbs surrounded him.

"Yeah, but then I remembered the cards can explode." I said, triggering the remains of the demonic energy inside the orbs, causing them to explode. I readied my next hand, waiting for Damion's next move. However, as the smoke cleared, he was surrounded by dozens of green energy orbs he must've charged up while covered by the smoke. He then launched the orbs at me. "House of Cards!" I announced, the 5 cards making a hexagonal shield around me, stopping the orbs but destroying all but the card behind me, but it was soon gone to as Damion rushed in with his talons, stabbing me in the chest, before kicking me off and through the card.

Our weapons continued to perfectly counter each other, Bayonetta and Jeanne now clashing their skates together as they fought and Damion blocking or deflecting my katanas with his broadswords, occasionally grazing each other, before hitting each other hard enough to make us each skid back 5 feet, at which point we pulled out or pistols and began firing at each other, the bullets bouncing off each other and never reaching their target. However, I soon noticed Bayonetta and Jeanne were throwing a missile back and forth between them and Bayonetta appeared to be wearing down. At this rate, she wouldn't be able to return the missile next time. "Bayonetta!" I shouted, shooting the missile when Jeanne caught it, catching her in the explosion.

However, this left me open to be stabbed by Damion's Dracotaclysm scythe. "You don't know how to mind your own business, do you?" He asked.

I coughed up some blood, but glared at him. "It's called giving a shit. Try it sometime!" I snapped, headbutting him, before drawing Ryuk and slashing him with the dual kamas, forcing him back.

Suddenly, a missile came flying in, Jeanne and Damion leaping onto it, causing it to turn and come back at us, forcing us to dodge and jump on it as well, continuing the fight. This became precarious, as we now had to worry about attacking our allies in the narrow, confined surface of the missile. Damion equipped his Heartseeker claws and attacked me while I went on the defensive with Permafrost, blocking all of his attacks and managing to hit him in the face with the staff, staggering him. He then blasted at me with the plasma cannons, but I fired ice shards from to counter them, but this left me open for a rushing slash across the chest.

Bayonetta and Jeanne were again masterfully dancing around each others attacks, neither one seeming to gain any ground until Jeanne rushed in with a kick, which Bayonetta dodged, leaving Jeanne open for several slashes from Shuraba, followed up by dozens of jabs from the katana, before Jeanne managed to backflip out of harm's way and into the air, dropping down on Bayonetta with an axe kick, which Bayonetta blocked with some difficulty, pushing Jeanne back. Suddenly, we noticed the missiles was heading straight for a building and would crash, forcing us to jump off and onto the next missile.

Shortly after landing, Bayonetta and Jeanne clashed once again, forcing them to duke it out with a barrage of punches that repeatedly slammed into each other, Wicked Fists trying to overpower each other as well, before Bayonetta's finally powered through and knocked Jeanne back with a devastating haymaker. Meanwhile, Damion and I each threw a round kick, our feet clashing into each other right at the ankle, forcing us to also follow through with an onslaught of kicks that constantly clashed and cancelled out each other, eventually forcing us to stop and nurse our sore shins, before glaring at each other and shooting each other in the face with a fireball to knock the other back.

This, however, caused us to wind up beside the Witch we were fighting AGAINST, not the one we were fighting WITH. Bayonetta narrowly dodged the attacks from Damion's dragon scythe and used Sai Fung to fight back, although the hits she landed with the weapon barely seemed to faze him. Meanwhile, Jeanne matched me move for move as I used Ghostshade to contend with her sabre version of Shuraba. I managed to land a small cut on her face and kick her back. She noticed the blood coming from her cheek and became furious, using Witch Time and slashing me all to hell before kicking me back just as Bayonetta wrapped Damion in her whip and flung him at me.

We crashed together in between the two witches, spinning around and grabbing each other by the collars, jumping off the missile in the process. Jeanne and Bayonetta silently decided to get off the missile as well and jumped onto the building as Damion and I crashed and separated, all of us drawing our lightsaber weapons for the final bout. Bayonetta and Jeanne once again rushed in with stabbing attacks, dashing and almost dancing around each other in an attempt to dodge their attackers and land their own hits.

They jumped onto the wall to the side with the fake waterfall and began fighting their, Jeanne landing a few strong hits before lashing out with a Wicked Kick, but Bayonetta dodged the giant foot and began landing her own combo, ending with a Wicked Stomp that knocked Jeanne back onto the ground. Bayonetta jumped off the wall and hacked down on her, but the younger Umbran rolled out of the way, getting to her feet and preparing for one final slash, Bayonetta doing the same. They both rushed forward and slashed at each other, Bayonetta leaning forward in pain slightly as Jeanne collapsed behind her.

Back with Damion and I, we circled each other, making the occasional fake start, but neither of us fell for it. "This is where it ends." Damion said.

"On that, we finally agree." I said. We rushed in at this, still matching each other move for move. I managed to land a round kick to Damion's side, but he used this and the slight push that came with it to move to the side and hit me in the back with his blade. I shouted in pain and swung at him with the lightsaber in my left hand, but he ducked under it and weave to the left, getting in front of me as I was wide open, kicking me in the chest and knocking me back. I rushed in and slashed at him with both blades, but he Matrix dodged under it and stomped on the back of my left leg, bringing me down onto that knee. He hacked down on me for a finishing blow, but I blocked his saber above my head with both of mine, tipping them up so his blade slid off mine, allowing me to turn and slash him in the chest with both weapons, causing him to stagger back and fall to the ground.

 **End music**

Bayonetta stood over Jeanne as she laid defeated on the ground. "Now it's decided." Jeanne said emotionlessly.

"So it is." Bayonetta said in the same tone. It was as if the two didn't know how to feel about this.

Meanwhile, I stood over my defeated adversary. "It's over, Damion... Whatever your reason is for fighting me, it dies with you." I say, raising my sword to finish him.

"Bold words coming from you. That rat bastard has my sister, Selene...I was fighting to get her back...That's my only reason for doing this..." He explained.

I was shocked at this, before growling. "Zeidan..." I said, glaring at the tower I knew he was waiting in, before looking back at Damion, lowering my sword. "I'm sorry... Out of all my enemies, you had the only decent reason to fight. I'll save your sister and I'll make him suffer. That's a promise." I said.

"I hope you can give him hell. But leave him for me to finish off. I want to make him pay for putting hands on my sister." He said.

"Very well. We'll make sure he gets the slow death he deserves." I said.

"The fear is still not gone from your eyes..." Jeanne stated.

"Fear?" Bayonetta asked.

"The memories you've held for 500 years are the source of your fear. They cloud your vision. But now, you've accepted your fate. That is how you bested me. That is why you possess the most beloved of Umbran treasures. That is why you possess the Left Eye." Jeanne explained.

Bayonetta took the ruby out of her Umbran Watch and looked at it. "We fought for this stone... And because of it everyone died."

"That gem brings back so many memories..." Jeanne said, taking the gem in her hands and remembering...

* * *

The scene replayed to reveal that Jeanne stabbed Bayonetta, but sealed her into the jewel to keep her safe. "That is why the Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! I will not stand for the wild ambition of a treacherous Lumen Sage who disrupted our age old balance. Your path ends here! Do not fear your fate. Stand... Cereza." Jeanne declared as she held the gem to the sky.

* * *

"In the innocence of our childhood, we used to play together as friends. But as time passed, perhaps even my eyes were clouded with fear." Jeanne reminisced fondly.

"We were...?" Bayonetta asked, shocked and saddened.

"Do not fear your fate. Stand, Cereza. Stand and open your eyes. For with every truth, there is another one to be seen." Jeanne told her." Suddenly, the defeated witch sat up and shot Bayonetta in the head, staggering her.

"Now, go!" Damion said, using a wave of energy to push me back. We looked at our defeated counterparts in confusion as they both smiled, before we heard a sound, looking up to hear missiles flying down at us, striking down on Jeanne and Damion directly, sending Bayonetta and I flying into the building across from us, Bayonetta crashing into a pillar as I hit a wall.

We both looked up to the destroyed rooftop where our final battle took place and our tragic enemies fell, now engulfed in flames. "Jeanne." Bayonetta said sadly.

"Damion... I'll do right by you. I'll save Selene. I promise." I said to the fire.

We were so busy looking at the flames we didn't even notice the elevator ding and a certain reporter stepping out. "Hey. Is it over!" Luka announced, walking up with Cereza in his arms.

"What the hell!? You made it?!" I asked in disbelief.

"What!? It's not like you don't scare the shit out of me all the time!?" He countered.

"Cereza! I don't know whether to shoot you or take you to Vegas for good luck, Cheshire." Bayonetta said.

"Give me more credit than that. If you must know... Where L.U.K.A. Luka is concerned, there's no such thing as luck. Only skill." He explained, recalling as they bailed from the vehicle before it exploded. "You didn't expect me to trust bitches... I mean witches, did you, Bayonetta!?" He asked as he walked up.

"How's the little one?" Bayonetta asked, stroking her hair.

"Out like a light, but OK other than that. What about you? You really think I'm gonna let myself be seen in public with a girl looking all beat up like that?" He asked, producing a lollipop and handing it to her.

"Hey, man. You just earned my respect. Don't ruin it already." I warned him.

"I look dreadful, do I? You'll have to learn to wipe that stupid look off your face or I'll never let you keep chasing me around this world. Got that? Luka." She asked, before strutting off.

"Now that's more like it." He said with a smirk, before following us.


	15. Climbing The Tower to The Climax

We stood in front of a pair of large golden doors that began to open, a brilliant gold light shining in front of us. Cereza began to stir and Bayonetta smiled at the child. "Welcome back, little one." She said.

"Mummy... Where are we?" Cereza asked as Luka set her down.

"It looks like someone's expecting us. Awfully nice of them to roll out the red carpet." Luka said.

"A little too nice, since they just tried to blast us with missiles." I said suspiciously.

[It can't be this easy. They must be up to something...]

It's a trap!

"Luka, you need to get one thing straight-" Bayonetta started.

"Yeah. I know. 'I won't look after you, so don't screw up.' I got things under control." Luka recited for her.

"You better hope you do." I said.

He totally doesn't.

[Nope.]

"Let's go. Stay next to me, little one." Bayonetta instructed.

 _"Rise my child! Rise to realize your true potential! Unleash your power and awaken the Eyes of the World!"_ The familiar voice rang out in Bayonetta's head once again.

But apparently, she wasn't the only one to hear it. "Daddy...!?" Cereza asked eagerly.

"What?" Bayonetta asked.

"Daddy! It's Daddy!" Cereza said happily.

"Daddy?" Bayonetta questioned.

"Of course, Mummy! Can't you hear him?" Cereza asked. There was a pause, as if she was listening to someone, before she spoke again. "OK, Daddy. I'm coming... And I'll bring Mummy with me." She complied with this unheard order, running forward.

"Little one, wait!" Bayonetta cried out, reaching for her.

"This way, Mummy!" Cereza said, hurrying ahead.

"Little one!" Bayonetta yelled, running through the doors.

"Cereza, wait!" I called, hurrying after Bayonetta.

We passed into the next room, but found no one there. "Little one!" Bayonetta called, rushing after Cereza.

However, the doors quickly closed behind us before Luka could make it through. "Cerezita!? Bayonetta!? Sai!? Damn it." Luka snapped as he pounded on the doors.

* * *

"Well, I guess we're on our own from here." I said as we continued, but almost immediately, two statues broke open and released a Fairness and a Fearless.

See! A trap! Totally called it!

[We heard you the first time, Admiral Ackbar...]

Bayonetta wasted no time drawing and cleaving the Fairness in twain with Shuraba as I drew Voiceless, turned around and took a knee while holding the handles against my shoulders, the blades sticking straight up and easily slicing the monster's outstretched legs out as they made contact, before I jumped and stabbed down into the de-limbed monster's head, finishing it off.

"The statues are far more lively than I'd like." Bayonetta said.

"Then lets make like these statues and break out of here." I said as we proceeded forward.

Lame!

[But admittedly fitting.]

We then hurried ahead, dealing with the angels that seemed to block our path every 10 steps along the way. Eventually, we reached the end of the hallway and were attacked by a pair of Braves, but we dispatched with them easily enough and proceeded to the next room, encountering and defeating a couple of Joys. Finally, we made our way up to the next floor, but as soon as we were up the stairs, we were attacked by a pair of Enchants, a Grace and a Glory. "You've got to admire their persistence " She said, lashing out at the clawed angels with her own deadly claws.

"I'd admire them more if they left me alone. Half the reason I kill them is because they screw with me first. Fine. I'll deal with these two pairs with Two Pair!" I said, drawing Asmodeus.

I did indeed draw 2 Pair: The Jacks and 9's of clubs and hearts plus the Ace of Spades, waving my hand through the air in a figure 8 motion, the cards flying through the air in front of me in the exact same motion, repeatedly going past and cutting the Enchants as they did, before returning to me, the two pairs becoming giant as I grabbed the still small Ace of Spades, charged with demon energy and flung it between the Enchants, blasting them into the air, before grabbing the Jacks and cross-slicing through them, repeating the motion with the 9's, destroying the wheel-like angels.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta had rushed in at the Grace and Glory, dodging their attacks and activating Witch Time, clawing them to shreds and finishing them off with a final blast from a lightning ball. This destroyed the barrier and allowed us to continue. However, as soon as we went up the stairs, we sensed a disturbance and dodged just in time to dodge a massive fist just like Temperantia's. "Well now. These angels are truly getting desperate to destroy the building their leader is hiding in." She said.

"But there's innocent people in here! And Damion's sister! We have to stop it!" I shouted. We hurried ahead, dispatching even more angels that blocked our path until we reached the next floor and found a balcony with an anti-aircraft turret on either side of it. "Okay, what the hell kind of building is this that it needs this kind of heavy artillery?" I asked.

"Just think of it as a sign of our good luck." Bayonetta said, hurrying to the closest turret, before a figure dropped down in front of it. "What?!" She asked in disbelief.

"It can't be..." I said in disbelief as I looked at the half black and red, half white and gold figure in front of me. "Shuya!" I shouted.

[But that can't be! My body was destroyed! My SOUL is inside your body. This means...]

That asshole cloned us! He must've mixed a part of our body with an angel's to try and make Nephilims or something.  


"Zeidan... This just got all kinds of wrong. Go for the turret! I'll cover you." I told Bayonetta, before rushing in and slamming into this clone of my defeated cousin, equipping Doomspore to my arms, the mouths of the left gauntlet chomping down on his shoulder as I jammed it into his shoulder, then slammed the other one into his stomach, the minigun part spinning and firing, unleashing a massive onslaught of bullet's into the copy's gut as Bayonetta made it to the turret and began firing at Temperentia's clone.

"I'll have to get Rodin to make me one of these." Bayonetta said as she unloaded her ammo into the angel's head, before noticing the missiles it was firing and shot all but one of them down, which hit the turret and shook her a bit. "Of course, it'll have to move. Sitting in one place would just be begging for an angel to take my head off." She said, continuing to fire.

The angel fired more missiles at her while Shuya's clone headbutted me, causing me to let him go and stagger back, allowing him to run in towards her. Acting quickly, I drew Permafrost and froze one of the clone's feet to the floor, holding him in place long enough for me the rush in, beat him down with a strong combo and hit him with a spinning round kick that sent him into one of the missiles about to hit Bayonetta, blowing it up. The angel then flew in and was about to crush me under its fist, but Bayonetta finally put enough bullets in it to kill it. "Whew. Thanks." I said.

"Well, it's only fair. You stopped that awful clone from reaching me, so I stopped the angel from reaching you." She said.

"That's fuckin' TEAMWORK~!" I sang.

Oh yeah! Tenacious D!

[Funniest band of all time.]

Bayonetta rolled her eyes and sighed. "Let's get moving. Cereza could be in trouble." She said.

We continued into the next room and I kicked down a flimsy metal door leading into an elevator shaft. Fortunately, the full moon was out in force, so Bayonetta could walk up walls. But before we could do that, we had do dodge an elevator that was dropping down on us. We quickly dove out of the way, avoiding being crushed an exploded, before running up the wall, dodging even more elevators as they careened down towards us. "I thought there was only one elevator per shaft." I said.

"Clearly, these people do things differently." Bayonetta said as we avoided them. Suddenly, all the windows shattered and we were faced with a clone of Iustita and a half-angel, half-demon clone of Raijin.

No! My beautiful image! He ruined it!

[It was ruined to begin with...]

Hey!

"Guys, less bitching, more killing the abomination and disgrace to Raijin's pride right in front of us." I told them, rushing in, dodging the jets of water the clone shot at me and slashing through its chest at devastating speeds with Masamune and Murasama. I slashed it several more times, before kicking it back. Unfortunately, this gave the clone the opening it needed to blast me with a powerful jet of water from both hands, launching me back a few good feet and making huge amounts of steam rise off of me. "AAH! DAMN! Raijin, I thought you said I was resistant to water now!" I snapped.

I said RESISTANT, not PROOF.

[A blast of water that strong would've put a hole in a bank vault. Be thankful you aren't smoldering right now.]

"Dammit! I manage not to get snuffed out in the ocean, only for a walking fire hydrant to drench me. I'll have to be more careful about this." I said, glaring at the clone.

Meanwhile, Bayonetta had slight difficulty dodging the angel's tentacles, but after every successful dodge, she managed to land a couple of powerful slashes with Durga. And thankfully, since the angel was a mere copy of Iustita, it was far weaker and soon enough it's baby-faced tentacle dropped to the ground, dazed, allowing her to jump on it and run down it until she reached the orb-like body of the angel and hit it in the face with a flying kick, causing the root of its tentacle tongue to be exposed and immediately sliced away, Bayonetta jumping back to the safety of the building just before the angel was destroyed.

I launched a stream of fire at Raijin's clone as it launched a jet of water at me, the flames and waves clashing and creating a huge wall of steam. There was a short pause, before a fireball flew through the steam and hit the clone in the face. I then rushed out of the steam cloud and rushed in with Permafrost, freezing the clone's feet and hitting him with a massive combo with the staff, before impaling and completely freezing the clone, then harshly ripping out the staff and shattering the clone. "You know, the first time was annoying enough, we didn't need any encores." I said angrily.

"They're doing whatever they can to stop us. Bringing back some of our stronger enemies only makes sense, even if they are weaker in these forms." Bayonetta explained. We continued up the elevator shaft until we finally reached the door to the next floor and dropped in. We entered the hallway and saw a massive statue of a woman. "So, this must be their Almighty Jubileus." Bayonetta explained.

I glared at the statue apprehensively. "I don't know why, but I'm getting some REAL bad vibes from this thing." I said.

"Well, then. I suggest we keep moving." She said, walking ahead.

We entered the next room and were slightly surprised to find jet-powered platforms leading up to the next level of the building. We leaped up and looked in disbelief to see the room looked like it was connected to Paradiso itself, with golden paths of light and clouds of gold everywhere you looked. "It's like they actually connected the Human World to Paradiso. That should be impossible." I said, before the familiar draining feeling of the holy air around me kicked in. "But nope. This is definitely Paradiso. It feels like the air itself is trying to kill me." I said.

"Whoever this place belongs to, he's throwing the balance of the worlds completely out of control. And he's gotten on my last nerve." Bayonetta said, heading over to a strange device and spinning on it, causing it to drop into the light of Paradiso and create strange mechanical platforms that appeared in random places all throughout the room, leading up to yet another elevator much higher up.

I looked up at the platforms and the convoluted path we'd have to take in order to reach the elevator, completely bewildered. "Who the fuck designed this place?!" I asked in disbelief.

The labyrinth from that Bowie movie was less complex than this!

[If I still had a mouth, I would've puked 5 times by now.]

Regardless, we still got on the strange platforms and gradually made our way through the demented puzzle of the room, soon reaching the platform with the elevator that would allow us to continue our trek up the tower. Unfortunately, we were met with yet another familiar boss: a Golem, which took the form of hekatonchier. "Well, well. It looks like another of our angelic friends wants an encore." Bayonetta said.

"Well, I think it's time for this act to retire." I said as we rushed in. I got the angel's attention, dodging its punches and counterattacking with Permafrost, hitting and building up ice on the arms and weighing them down, allowing Bayonetta to land dozens of brutal, lightning-fast hits on its core with Sai-Fung, dealing massive damage before it finally managed to reform and protect its core. It made one more attempt to attack us by snapping at us as Gomorrah, but we dodged the attack and used Witch/Bullet Time and attacked the vulnerable core with blindingly fast attacks, weakening it enough for Bayonetta to summon Hekatonchier and play volley ball with the orb-like angel, before finally crushing it. "Let's hope we're almost there. We go up much higher and we'll be in space." I said.

"Indeed. I've had more than my fill of high places for one day." Bayonetta agreed as we dropped onto the platform and entered the elevator shaft. We got about halfway up when one final clone, one of Sapentia, dropped down in front of us. "Of course. We saw all the others. Why not this one?" Bayonetta said as we prepared to fight.

To make matters worse, the tower below us began to crack and break. "Well, nowhere to go but up now. And we better do that quickly." I said, rushing in and slashing away at him with my Kamaitachi, then doing a backflip and uppercutting with with my Ryuk, which was attached to my legs, staggering him back. Bayonetta then rushed past and landed several slashes on him with Shuraba, before going for a jump kick and hitting the beast with a Wicked Weave, staggering him even more, leaving him open as I rushed in and did a breakdance headspin with Ryuk extended, hitting him several more times with the oversized kamas and blasting him back once more with a Demonic Finisher kick. "Been a little bit since I did one of those." I said.

"Excellent work, Sai, but I think it's time I finished this." Bayonetta said, sliding in on Odette, doing a backflip into the air and raising an ice spike to stab the clone in the chin, before hitting it several more times with the skates as she did about a half dozen backflips in mid-air. She then landed and slashed away with Durga, before slashing upwards with the claws and shooting a Wicked Fist out of the ground to finish the angel and knock him off the wall, falling and impaling himself on the strange crown-like piece of the building below.

This, however, caused a massive explosion that rose up towards us. Of course, I'd be completely unaffected, but Bayonetta would be fried. "It's about to get real hot in here in a second! Hurry ahead! I'll try to stop it!" I told her.

"Such a good boy." Bayonetta said, before turning into her panther form and rushing ahead as I began to absorb the flames.

I was indeed slowing the inferno down, but it still wasn't stopping. I put more power behind the absorption and finally managed to cease the spread of the flames and pull them all into me, wiping my brow and panting slightly from the process. "Whew. Man, I can't eat like that anymore. Big bursts of flames like that don't sit as well as they used to." I said, patting my stomach and hurrying after Bayonetta, who waited near the top of a tower on a window.

"How was your meal?" She asked.

"Filling and tiring. I'm as stuffed as a turkey at Thanksgiving and it feels like I ate the whole turkey and the tryptophan's kicking in." I said.

"Hm... Well, maybe this will wake you up." Bayonetta said, stomping on the window we stood on, causing us to drop down on to some strange, orb-like chandelier with a blazing flame in the middle. We then made our way to the top of the chandelier, which hung from 4 strings attached to orbs, attached to our platform. "This red liquid is flowing through those orbs. They must be pumping into and powering this sphere. I wonder what will happen without that power?" Bayonetta pondered.

"Let's find out." I said as we attacked and destroyed the orbs, which dropped the sphere. However, what we didn't know was we were actually on the bottom of the sphere, the strings and orbs anchoring it down. And when we destroyed them, the sphere did drop down, but raised up instead...

* * *

When the sphere came to a stop, we found that we were now high up in the air, almost a mile above any other buildings. "We went even higher?! Okay, this is just getting ridiculous." I said.

"And it looks like we still have a ways to go." Bayonetta said, noticing another path of light in front of us, jumping on and running up it. I followed her and we rushed along the needlessly long path, curving around the building and finally reaching the top, a strange orange portal leading into the golden dome that was likely the lair of the Ithavol CEO and mastermind behind this plot. Zeidan was likely also there. "Finally. No more running and hiding. It's time I meet the man behind all this." Bayonetta said.

"And I'll finish things with Zeidan. Let's end this." I said. But suddenly, as we were about to go through the doors, a portal to the Gates of Hell appeared, Rodin stepping out. "Rodin! What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Before you go and finish things like you just said, I've got one last deal for you two." He said, the three of us descending to the Gates.

* * *

We reappeared in the Gates of Hell, Rodin going back behind the bar. "We don't have time for this, Rodin. We need to get Cereza back from that Ithavol guy and I need to save Selene from Zeidan, before I rip the top of his skull of and roast his brain." I told him as we approached the bar.

"My, my. That's quite the bold claim. But are you positive your are capable of doing so?" A voice said and I noticed a patron sitting at the far right side of the bar. He then stood up and walked towards us. He was easily 8 feet tall with waist-length black hair with red streaks, paper-white skin and eyes with black sclera and red irises, wearing a black robe and blood red greaves and claw-fingered gauntlets that looked like the feet and hands of a humanoid dragon. This was my grandfather and the god of death itself, Lord Arokai (air-oh-kai), voiced by Jeremy Irons.

Oh, God! I mean- Oh, him! It's grandpa!

[I never thought we'd see him in a dump like this!]

"Lord Arokai!" I said, instantly kneeling.

"Lord? Well, he must truly be someone special if Sai is kneeling to him." Bayonetta said.

"Oh, only the God of Death... And Sai's dear old Grandfather." Rodin explained.

"What?!" Bayonetta asked in disbelief, showing a rare moment of shock.

"Come now, Sai. No need for that. Rise, my grandchild." He said.

"Of course, Grandfather." I said, doing so. "So, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Well, my old friend Rodin here informed me that you have been doing us quite the service, destroying those rogue angels and how you seek to destroy your uncle Zeidan." He explained.

"Yes, Grandfather. He's gone too far this time. His actions threaten the very trinity of reality." I told him.

"Indeed. I have no intention of stopping you from carrying out your goal, but I've come to test if you have the strength to do so. I saw your first fight with Zeidan. You seemed equal then, but surely he's waiting for you now and has had ample time to prepare." He explained.

"I'm aware of the risks, Grandfather, but still, I can't let him get away with what he's done." I explained.

"Very good, my boy." He said.

"Not to break up this loving reunion, but what exactly did you bring us here for, Rodin?" Bayonetta asked.

"It's like I said, I got a deal for you." Rodin told her. "If you think you got enough halos to afford it, how about showing me some love? With enough of those shiny little loops, I can get back to the real me. The old me... And if you can manage to get out of it alive, I'll give you something real special. If you get your hands on what I'm offering, anything in your way is gonna wish it was already dead." He explained.

"Well, I certainly like that idea." Bayonetta said.

"And I'm here for a similar reason, Sai. Surely, if you can hold your own against the God of Death, a mere demon like your uncle will be inconsequential. And not only that, but I'll give you the greatest weapon in my arsenal. You may even become stronger than Katana." Arokai explained.

"A chance to fight my grandfather... And get a weapon that could make me stronger than Katana? How could I refuse." I said.

By saying "No thanks! I don't want to die!"

[Exactly. Grandfather or not, he's the GOD OF DEATH. You don't mess with a person who has that title.]

"Very well, but don't expect me to go easy on you. I can't even guarantee you'll survive." Arokai warnedack.

"Sounds like fun." I said.

[We're gonna die AGAIN.]

"I agree. It's a deal, Rodin. Let's get to it." Bayonetta said.

"Alright, then. Let's get the party started. Shit's gonna get real." Rodin said, rising up and entering a portal behind him, pulling Bayonetta through, before black mist poured out of Arokai and enveloped the two of us.

* * *

We emerged in a place with black smoke everywhere in a similar manner to Paradiso's golden clouds, standing on a large platform made of purple demonic energy. "What is this place?" Bayonetta asked.

"Forget where we are. Focus on who we're here WITH." I said, pointing ahead of us.

Rodin floated a few feet above the ground in front of us wearing a white and gold robe, with red energy coursing throughout it, 8 giant golden peacock feathers on either side of him. He chuckled, raising his hand and doing the Matrix taunt, a sign for us to bring it on.

Next to him, stood my grandfather in his True God, his black robe turned blood red, with the kanji for "Death" adorning it all over. 6 bone wings with thin, yet clearly powerful black, cloth-like webbing came from his back and his head now looked like that of a dragon's (picture a black Rathalos with Rathian's chin spike) and a menacing tail tipped with 3 of what looked like a mix between a spear head and a pyramid. In his left hand, he held a black claymorer with about a foot of chain hanging from the pommel, black smoke coming from the blade and in his right hand, he held a scythe made of blood red bones with a pitch black blade.

"Well, this is a lot more ominous than we were led to believe." I said.

"Getting cold feet, are we?" Bayonetta asked with a smirk.

"Nope. Just getting more fired up." I said.

"That's what I like to hear." She said.

[Gentlemen, it's been an honor fighting and dying alongside you.]

I want my Mommy!

"Don't worry, guys. We got this." I said.

[You don't got this.]

 _ **"LET THE BLOODSHED COMMENCE."**_ Arokai said, all 4 of us rushing in at our respective adversaries.

 **Background Music: "Let The Bodies Hit The Floor" by Drowning Pool**

Bayonetta rushed in with her panther form, before becoming human and dodging Rodin's attack, equipping and charging up Pillow Talk, greatly extending the lightsaber blade and slashing The Infinite One, dealing considerable damage right off the bat, before he drifted back to a safe distance. He created 8 orange spheres of energy in an arc above himself, before firing them at Bayonetta, who once again had to use her panther form to avoid the attacks. She got in close on his left side after this and landed a few more hits, before he threw a backhand, the peacock feathers on his back folding in before swinging outward in a similar motion, forcing her to jump back He then created a horizontal ring of 8 more spheres she dodged once again, before creating a green energy circle and flying through it at blinding speeds, slamming into Bayonetta and knocking her back. She jumped to her feet and glared at Rodin, growling as blood from her forehead ran down her head and forced her to close her eye, or else let the blood drip into it.

I equipped all 4 of Last Regrets and fired at Arokai with both guns in my hand and one of my foot guns as he rushed in at me, jumping and spiraling sideways through the air as he slashed at me with his scythe, before turning sideways to narrowly dodge a stab from his claymore, equipping Ryuk to my hands and Kamaitachi to my feet, backflipping and staggering Arokai with a blast of wind from the fans, before doing a double front-flip in mid-air with Ryuk out in front of my, getting two pairs of slashes off against the God of Death with the kamas.

Bayonetta and Rodin continued to dodge or counter each other's attacks in almost a dance of attacks that seemed like it would never end, before finally Bayonetta started landing attacks on him once again, a few quick strikes, immediately followed by a charged attack for large damage. However, Rodin didn't seem to be bothered by the hits he was taking and snapped his fingers, suddenly calling down a large number of small meteors forcing Bayonetta to dodge. This, however, left her open, as Rodin was charging a blue sphere, before launching and engulfing Bayonetta in it. She tried to break out, but she wasn't quick enough, as Rodin rushed in and grabbed her, everything going white, before a series of black pulses exploded everywhere along with the sound of punches, similar to Akuma's Raging Demon Attack. When everything cleared, Rodin was laying on his side, holding his arm up to his head, looking rather pleased as Bayonetta also laid on her side, significantly weakened. Rodin got up and floated away just before Bayonetta got back to her feet, panting heavily and looking exhausted.

I held Arokai's giant scythe back with my two smaller ones, before noticing Bayonetta's condition. "Bayonetta!" I shouted, pushing back and shooting a fireball from my mouth to keep Arokai back, turning and trying to run and help Bayonetta, but before I got anywhere, Arokai's claymore pierced through my coat, into my back and coming out of my chest, causing me to cough up blood.

Arokai lifted his sword, lifting me into the air and pulling me in closer. _**"He is her fight. I am yours. Never take your eyes off your opponent."**_ He said darkly, slitting my throat with his scythe, before harshly kicking me off his sword and to the ground, then creating and shooting a black dragon skull of death at me, knocking me back down the instant I got back up.

I took in a few deep breaths and panted heavily once my throat sealed back up, before I glared t my godly grandfather. "Okay, then. You've got my full attention." I said, readying Permafrost. I rushed in, deflecting his scythe into the ground and freezing it in place, then landing several hits on him with the ice scythe, doing a back handspring to avoid a slash from the claymore, landing on my hands and equipping Doomspore on my feet, unloading the miniguns into the god of death, pushing forward again to get over the claymore as he slashed again, hitting with with a powerful Demonic Finisher Kick, knocking him back.

Back with Bayonetta, she was on the defensive, narrowly dodging all of Rodin's attacks, looking for any opening she could find. Finally, she managed to counter one of his punches and activate Witch Time, slashing him with another powered up attack from Pillow Talk, before delivering several kicks backed up by rockets from Lt. Kilgore and blasting him back with a Wicked Kick. He backed off and powered up another blue sphere, but Bayonetta rushed in and caught him with an upward slice just before he could throw the orb, destroying it and sending Rodin back into his normal form.

Finally, I equipped Masamune and Murasama to my hands and Voiceless to my feet, dodging, blocking or deflecting each of Arokai's attacks, before countering and hitting him with a powerful cross slash to the chest, stunning him as I activated Bullet Time and started hacking away with the demonic and holy katanas. But suddenly, he moved and grabbed the swords, completely unaffected by Bullet Time. He smirked and began to create another black dragon skull. If it hit me, I'd be done for. Acting quickly, I swung my legs and hit him with Voiceless, spinning horizontally with my legs out and together, making a kind of plasma blade drill and stunning Arokai, before hitting him with one final Demonic Finisher Fist.

 **End Music**

Arokai returned to his human form and smiled at me. He was still easily capable of continuing the fight, but he had a look of satisfaction on his face. "Well done. Both of you. I believe I've seen all I need to." He said, returning us to The Gates of Hell.

* * *

Bayonetta, Arokai and I all landed on our feet, albeit a bit wobbly for Bayonetta and I, will Rodin collapsed to the floor when he emerged, climbing his way back up to his feet, supporting himself against the bar. "I gotta hand it to ya, Bayonetta. You sure let me have my fun. I never thought a girl would beat my ass so hard. But I gotta admit... I kinda liked it." Rodin said.

"Beating on those who forget their place seems to be my specialty, darling. Don't feel too bad." She said teasingly.

"And I must admit, Sai, you preformed incredibly. Spirits and demons often try to escape from Hell, especially those of greater power and I must always stop them. But today, you've given me a greater challenge than I've had in centuries. You may indeed surpass Katana one day." Arokai told me.

"I don't need to beat Katana. As long as I can protect the innocent and exterminate the evils that threaten them, I'll be happy." I said.

[How touching.]

I think I'm gonna cry!

"Now, about this weapon you were offering?" Bayonetta asked.

"You win... This time, baby." Rodin said, offering her 4 large rings. Bayonetta slipped one on each ankle and watched in amazement as they turned into several different kinds of weapons.

"Whoa... It's like every weapon the angels have used against us so far... all in one." I said.

"Impressive indeed. But here's something from the gods themselves." Arokai said, snapping his fingers. Suddenly, a motorcycle appeared with wheels made of 4 circular saw blades, a dragon's head where the headlight should be, blade-like dragon wings on the sides to protect my legs and slice anything too close and a xenomorph-like tail where the tail light should be.

[Oh, fuck, the hell, YES.]

"Ohh-ho-ho... That's what I'm talking about." I said with a malicious smirk, hopping on.

 **Dragonsbane: Once known as Ebonfury, the personal steed of Arokai, the God of Death. Slain in battle, the soul of the steed transformed into its current state, becoming even more lethal than it was in life. It is said only a god or their descendants can tame this mighty weapon, lest they be ripped asunder by it.  
**

"Well, I gave you the best things I can. Now get on out of here." Rodin said.

"Indeed. You've proven yourselves capable of dealing with whatever dangers you may face. Now go and finish the fight." Arokai said.

"Yes, Grandfather." I said, putting a fist to my heart and bowing my head.

"Oh, don't worry. We ARE finishing this. Now." Bayonetta said as we left the Gates of Hell.

* * *

We emerged right back where we started, standing in front of the orange portal, preparing to enter the sphere and face our final adversaries. "This is it..." I said, looking a Bayonetta as we gazed into the void of light ahead of us.

"Indeed it is. I'll finally have all the answers. And I'll get the little one back." She said.

"And I'll settle things with my dear old uncle." I said, cracking my neck and knuckles, the two of us entering the Golden Sphere.


	16. An Epic Unholy Ending

A man dressed in a white and gold robe, very similar to Rodin's robe when he regained his power, sat behind a desk, with Cereza sitting on his lap. "What follows those living in the light is nothing but the profound, empty darkness born from the shadow that grows longer as they approach the brilliant radiance. To truly see, your eyes must be open to both light and dark. Don't you agree, my dear child?" Balder said to Cereza, looking to the girl in his arms.

"Mummy's here! Mummy's here! Mummy!" Cereza said happily as we emerged through the portal.

"Little one..." Bayonetta said.

"You've arrived... My dear, sweet Cereza. And Zeidan's beastly nephew." He said, looking back to Bayonetta. "My my... Why the grim face, my dear. As a child, your smile was warmer than the sun." He asked.

"So, you are the last of the Lumen Sages." Bayonetta said.

"I am indeed. My name is Balder. But if you so choose, you may address me as Father." He said, turning to face us. "There is much you have forgotten- It has been 500 years since we last met. If your memories were still intact, this would have been a much more emotional reconciliation." Balder explained.

"You know this creepy priest? I mean, there's no Little Timmy glued to his crotch, so that's something, but I don't like that he has his hands on a small girl." I said.

"Nor do I." Bayonetta said, quickly looking at me, before glaring back at the sage. "How did you get the girl?" She asked.

He stood up and walked forward at this. "Where shall I begin? We, the Lumen Sages, and your Umbra Witches, have long been the overseers of history, each bearing witness with their own 'eye.' This is how our universe's..." He started, stopping next to a metal globe of the solar system and forcing it to move with some kind of magic before her continued. "...Existence was preserved. However, for 500 years, you have been exiled from the world's affairs. You are the Left Eye of the Eyes of the World." Balder illustrated, stopping the globe.

"Could you dispense with the riddles and just tell me what these sodding Eyes actually are!" Bayonetta demanded.

"I'm sick about hearing about them altogether. How about you tell us why you're filling a huge statue with angel blood, then we can kick your ass and call it a day." I said.

He sighed at this"You demons. Truly, you are without a grander vision." He said, shaking his head, before looking to Bayonetta.

"Your years of slumber have caused you to forget many things, even as we stand on the verge of the resurrection of the Creator... The resurrection of Jubileus. There is but one way to return your epoch of forgotten memories and open your eye of the overseer. Your uncorrupted eye had to be exposed to the history it could not see. Ah... Your battles... Your struggles... Everything you've experienced in this town has been a stepping stone to your enlightenment. It has all been done for the Left Eye." Balder explained.

"I've had enough of your philosophical pretensions. I won't ask again. Where did you get the girl?" Bayonetta asked forcefully.

"Your question has been answered. All this has been done to awaken the Left Eye. For that, you had to see yourself once more." He said.

"You are truly beyond salvation, Sage." Bayonetta said angrily.

"Ahh... Salvation. Such a curious word. I marked the path to salvation with light. However, no matter how brilliant that light grows, the darkness within the human heart grows even darker. Light, Dark, and Chaos between... Three realities once split shall be brought together to create a new universe in the image of the old. To these ends, leading to the Festival of Resurrection 500 years ago, I fanned the flames of terror... spurring on the witch hunts. However, despite the people's belief in the return of Jubileus, the Creator, the Left Eye was out of reach. Since then, I have devoted myself to this town's prosperity, and now it is time for my preparations to bear fruit. Jubileus will be resurrected, we will become the Eyes of the World, and a new universe will take hold!" Balder told his grand vision.

"I could never call the man behind this nightmare "Father"!" Bayonetta snapped.

"The universe is fine the way it is. But if there was anything I had to change, I'd take you and Zeidan out of it." I said.

Oh! Got eem!

[Sick burn, bruh.]

"Great speech, big guy." Luka said, stepping out from nowhere.

"Luka." Bayonetta said.

"Hey, you survived! Good for you!" I told him.

"Getting a bit ahead of ourselves, aren't we Mr. Big Shot Ithavoll Executive? Salvation, light... You take this entrepreneurial philosophy a bit seriously, don't ya? But it's all diarrhea of the mouth, if you ask me. History is littered with famous genocidal figures just like you... Or should I say infamous genocidal figures." Luka explained.

"Oh, shit. I thought my burn was good, but yours was like a fucking 5th degree burn. I don't even know if they go up that high." I said.

[They don't. 4th degree is the highest.]

The more you know!

"You must be Luka, journalist extraordinaire. I must say, I'm truly impressed you've made it this far, child. Like father, like son, I suppose." Balder said.

"What?!" Luka demanded.

"But both you and this demon have gotten tried my patience for the last time." He said, using some strange telekinesis to grab Luka and throw him out the window before Bayonetta and I could even react.

"Luka!" We both shouted, before I turned and glared at the sage.

"It seems my plans went right out the window." Balder joked.

[Dude. Too soon.]

Yeah! It's like a rule! You can't joke about someone important until at least a minute after they're dead!

"You claim to be a virtuous holy man, yet you just killed an innocent man, like I assume you had his father killed. I'd say you're more of a demon than I am. And any demon in the human world with evil intent... Dies at my blade!" I snapped, rushing in with Masamune and Murasama, but just as I was in striking range, he stopped me with the same telekinesis that killed Luka.

"I have no business with you, demon. Your fight is with that deplorable uncle of yours. He awaits you in the lower levels of this building. Now be gone from my sight." He said, creating a portal of light behind me, just to Bayonetta's right, throwing me towards it.

"No! Bayonetta!" I shouted, reaching out to her and trying to stop myself.

"Sai!" She called, trying to reach out and stop me as well, but in a flash I realized was Witch Time, Balder rushed forward and grabbed her by the throat, lifting her into the air. That was the last thing I saw before I was thrown into the portal, which immediately sealed shut behind me.

* * *

I reappeared in a dungeon-looking sub-level of the tower, where Zeidan sat in the middle, meditating on his knees, sitting on his feet, before opening his eyes with a smirk, glaring at me. "Hello, nephew." He said with a smirk.

"How could you stoop so low? Besides blackmailing an assassin to kill me, you also sent your own children out to fight and die trying to kill me. You worked with our sworn enemies and are endangering the Trinity of Reality JUST for more power?" I demanded.

"And when it's all over, I'll have a power that rivals any god. I'll be able to destroy their precious Jubileus with a wave of my hand when its guard is down and no one will ever oppose me." He said.

"No, you won't. Because you're going to die. But before that, you're going to tell me where Selene is." I said.

"Sparing thoughts for the family of your enemy. My, how soft you've gotten. Pathetic." He said.

Says the guy making his kids do all the fighting!

[Yeah. And didn't you only hit him 3 times before he ran away when you first fought him?]

(Thereabouts.) I confirmed mentally.

"I beat Damion to the point he was too weak to save himself from a missile, but he still used the last of his strength to save me. The VERY least I can do is save his sister. Now where is she?!" I demanded.

"Here." He said, looking to his right, where Selene was chained to a wall, unconscious. I growled and started to advance towards Zeidan, but he raised his hand. "Ah, ah, ah. One more step and she's dead." He warned, revealing the switch in his hand. I then noticed the chains were attached to powerful electric generators that could even generate enough wattage to fry a vampire.

"You're a monster. I can't believe you came from the same place as my mother. That you're the child of amazing beings like Arokai and Ignis." I growled.

"All the more reason I should rule this world as they rule Hell in the next." He said.

Oh, my gods, he's so self-absorbed! Why did we ever listen to this guy again?

[For one, he's our father. For another, he'd beat us to near-death if we didn't.]

"You'll return to Hell as another damned soul when I finish with you. But first I'll save Selene." I said.

"And how will you do that. Did you already forget 'one step and she's dead'?" He asked.

"I have learned that the-" I started.

"Oh, let me guess, the only way to save a hostage is to burn it, right?" He taunted.

"No. That's just retarded." I said bluntly.

He was actually surprised by this. "Oh, you kept it up so long, I just thought-" He started, lowering his guard.

"PSYCHE!" I shouted, throwing a roundhouse kick, launching a wave of fire from it that staggered Zeidan.

[Distracting him and taking advantage of a weakness. Good tactics.]

He learned from the best... Me!

[Keep dreaming, buddy...]

I then jumped and threw another round kick and fire wave, burning the chains about 6 inches above Selene's wrist, instantly melting them enough to the point they broke, allowing Selene to fall, but I caught her before she hit the ground. "Selene... Wake up..." I said, shaking her gently.

Selene stirred and awakened. "What kept you...?" She asked, expecting Damion, but was shocked to see me instead.

"I'm sorry... You're in all this danger because of me... Your brother was killed because of me... But I promised him I'd save you and make this bastard pay for all he's done." I said, glaring at Zeidan, who had recovered from my attack.

"My brother is dead...?" She asked, here eyes widening in shock and horror.

"He was blasted with a missile after our battle. I can only assume he didn't make it. I'm sorry." I apologized again.

Selene's eyes began to tear up. "No... No..." She said.

"I'm sorry. I failed him. But now I promise, I'll avenge him, by killing the man who kidnapped you and forced Damion to fight me." I said, glaring at Zeidan.

"Are you two done yet? I'd like to have you both dead before the sage gets done whatever he has planned for the witch." Zeidan said.

"Give him hell, Sai..." Selene said.

"I will. Now hurry and get out of here." I said, setting her down. "All Hell's gonna break loose." I said, readying to fight Zeidan as she ran to the exit.

"Got it...Don't die..." Selene said as she ran off to safety.

Well, Zeidan, looks like you get to help pay dad back for the beating he gave you!

[Oh, this has been a LONG time coming...]

"You just gotta keep getting in my way, Sai. It's time I put a stop to that." He said.

"It's time I put a stop to your life!" I said, rushing in.

 **Background Music: "Whatever it Takes" by Hollywood Undead**

I flew in, surrounded by fire and slammed my fist into Zeidan's chest, but at the last second, he used his Devil Trigger, transforming into a flying whirl wind in a vaguely humanoid shape, my fist slamming into his chest and not even fazing him. "What?!" I asked, before being knocked back with a devastating backhand. I skidded across the ground a few feet, before rolling into a 3-point landing position, clawing the ground to bring myself to a stop. "How. Even in your Devil form, that should've at least shook you." I asked, shocked.

Zeidan smirked at this. _**"This room is the complete opposite of the Sage's office, which dwells at the very edge of the human world and Paradiso. This room almost reaches Inferno, so the well of demonic energy is limitless. I've been soaking it in ever since our battle back in Vigrid. My power now rivals the gods. And once I get what I need from Jubileus, I'll surpass the gods!"**_ He explained.

"Jubileus won't happen! Bayonetta will stop Balder and I'll stop you here and now!" I snapped.

 _ **"Such confidence. Let's see how long it lasts."**_ He said, holding his arms out to the sides.

[Careful. He's readying one of his strongest attacks..]

We'll be fine! Everyone knows wind is the bitch element!

[I beg your fucking pardon?!]

He then swung his arms back and forth in front of him, launching two small wind blades with each inward swing and one huge one with each outward swing. I tried my best to dodge, but the sheer number of attacks overwhelmed me, even with Bullet Time, and one large blade hit me, causing me to bounce off several others, getting shredded by the wind pressure in the process. "Oh, gods! The bitch element's really strong!" I shouted in pain, before recovering and glaring at him. "But so am I!" I snapped, rushing in and landing several lightning fast punches and kicks on him, although they barely seemed to faze him.

[Boom-Chika-Ah! Boom-Chika-Ah! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom!]

(What are you doing?!) I demanded in my mind.

[We're trying to amp you up.]

(Well, it's distracting-) I started to explain in my mind, before Zeidan sent me flying back with a powerful blast of wind. ([Oh, shit, mothafucka!]) We all screamed as crashed into a wall, which collapsed on us. (Okay... Not working...) I thought.

[Maybe you should use all the super powerful demonic weapons you used to cut down hordes of angels...]

And, you know, US.

(Right.) I confirmed in my mind, drawing Permafrost and rushing in. I struck at Zeidan repeatedly, but he blocked or dodged every attack. However, I was also using Permafrost to freeze the room around us, even beginning to freeze the air currents around us and slowing Zeidan, allowing me to land several hits on him. However, while he was taking damage, it seemed to be barely anything significant.

 _ **"It's gonna take more than that, boy!"**_ He said, punching me. I blocked it, but it still sent me skidding back, dropping to one knee from exhaustion. _**"The itsy-bitsy demon came to try and fight. Down came his uncle and knocked out the demon's lights."**_ He sang to taunt me as he slowly walked forward.

"Okay then... How about this?!" I demanded, summoning Zuul.

The massive dog charged at his target, who lashed out with powerful blades of wind. _**"Zuu- Ah! Mothafu- ah! Zuu- AH! You A-HOLE!"**_ Zuul roared, before retreating back into the portal I summoned him from.

I stood there in shocked silence for a moment. "... Shit!" I said.

I used all of my weapons and hit him with their strongest combos and, while he did seem to be slightly wearing down, he still seemed capable of going on for ages. _**"What's wrong, Sai?! Is this the limits of your power!?"**_ He demanded, laughing arrogantly, before blasting me back against a wall with a huge gust once more.

"Nothing's working... I used everything..." I said heavily.

[What about the motorcycle?]

No! We gotta save that for the FINAL final fight. Only the climax is acceptable for such a weapon!

(Then what?) I asked mentally.

[You'll have to use BOTH of our powers.]

Yeah! Both our powers combined with you, he'll never see it coming!

(I guess it's our last bet.) I said, getting back up.

 _ **"It's time to die!"**_ He snapped, throwing one more punch at me...

... only for me to easily catch it, surrounded by an aura of wind and water. I stomped on the ground, shooting up several pieces of rocks below Zeidan to hit and stagger him, only to blast him back with a rush of water, sending him to the ground. _"Only you shall die today..."_ I told him, Shuya and Raijin's voices echoing along with mine.

Zeidan looked up at me in shock from where he sat on the ground. _**"Rocks!? Wind?! Water!? Impossible! You don't possess those powers!"**_ He snapped, before suddenly seeing the souls of Shuya and Raijin beside me. _ **"I see. You used our clan's forbidden technique. I didn't think you had the guts. But this is treason, my sons. I hope you know your souls can still suffer inside of Sai. I'll see to that personally."**_ He said.

 _"You will not cause any more suffering in this world."_ I told him, raising up and hitting him with a barrage of rocks, hitting him into a wall, using a blade of wind of my own to destabilize his form and flood the room with water, protecting myself with a bubble of air, which Zeidan had to become to survive in the room, which I destroyed with more rocks, forcing Zeidan back into his human form as I drained the room.

 **End Music**

"No... This can't be... I was going to have ultimate power..." He said, struggling back to his feet, shocked as I was right in front of him.

 _"Ultimate power should never belong to someone who would abuse it. You have abused the power you already have... And now its time to pay for it."_ I said, surrounding my fist with rocks, water and wind, hitting him with a massive uppercut as flew through the aira and even through the ceiling, drilling through the ground above us on our way back to the surface.

* * *

Meanwhile, Bayonetta fought furiously and valiantly, easily dealing enough damage to put a stop to Balder many times over, but each time she attempted to finish the sage with her demonic beasts, he managed to defend against and survive the attacks, using an orb of holy energy to stop Gomorrah's bite, exiting the sphere and shattering it, allowing him to grab Gomorrah's closed jaw and break the dragon's neck.

The second attempt came from Scolopendra, who managed to constrict and even shatter Balder's energy ball, but the sage still survived and blasted apart the massive centipede, even arrogant enough to take a peacock feather from his robe and comb his hair with it.

Thinking of one last option, Bayonetta drew her lipstick, looking at the writing on the side that said "Balder X Rosa" with a brief, sad look, before she inserted it into the gun and glared at her father. "Don't fuck with a witch!" Bayonetta snapped, firing the gun.

The lipstick did its job perfectly, flying towards the murderous sage, past the shards of glass caused by the building's destruction and finding its way into the mad holy man's head.

an inch wide hole appeared in the sage's forehead, seeping a mixture of blood and dark magic to seal the Lumen's demise. "May Jubileus, the Creator, grace you!" Balder cried as he plummeted to the ground...

* * *

After the massive fall, Balder's body finally crashed to the ground, Bayonetta landing shortly after and Luka zoomed overhead, snagged to a missile. Before he could pass overhead and get lost beyond the horizon, though, I emerged from the ground, delivering a mighty uppercut to Zeidan.

"SHORYUKEN!" I announced, the uppercut sending Zeidan high enough into the air to smack into Luka, freeing him from the missile and both of them falling to the ground, Zeidan being a convenient pillow to soften Luka's fall of at least two stories.

"I've got to give you two credit; Bayonetta, Sai. You never cease to impress." Luka said as he got back up.

"You know it, man." I said.

"You haven't seen the half of it." Bayonetta said.

"Oh, I've seen enough... Well, that about wraps it up, huh?" Luka asked.

"Not yet." Bayonetta said. She then walked up to a window and put her hand up to it, turning it into a brilliant white portal and walking through with Cereza...

... Several minutes seemed to pass, so I broke out Asmodeus and Luka and I began playing Poker.

"So, what do you think she's doing in there?" I asked.

"Honestly, at this point, I couldn't even begin to guess." Luka said, before we turned as Bayonetta emerged and walked towards us, before stopping and holding her chest in pain as she was surrounded by a strange red energy.

"Bayonetta!" I said worriedly, hurrying to her side.

"Bayonetta! What's happening to you!?" Luka asked fearfully, hurrying to her side as well. But as we placed hands on her to attempt to help, we were shocked and forced back by this strange energy.

Balder then rose from behind us, surrounded by blue energy. "You!" I shouted, trying to attack, but was blasted back by this same energy.

He then made his way forward and picked up Bayonetta."And now it is done. The Right Eye oversees the light, the Left Eye oversees the darkness. Two eyes to oversee the world. It was never the woman known as 'Bayonetta' that I set my sights upon. It was you as a child, Cereza, that I sought. For she was the one who saw the world through innocent eyes, and she was the one who could give rise to a new history. It was her energy that could awaken the Left Eye. This has all worked out splendidly. Let us begin, Cereza. The time is at hand. Now the resurrection of Jubileus shall be completed. We are the eyes, overseeing the world. We are the eyes, overseeing a new era... A new reality... To which we will devote ourselves eternally. May Jubileus, the Creator, grace all of its creations!" Balder preached, rising into the air as the massive statue of Jubileus rose from the tower as part of a rocket. He then flew into the right eye as Bayonetta was somehow floated into the left.

* * *

The rocket then began to take off, rocketing Bayonetta and Jubileus into space with it, Bayonetta to be forever lost to us and Jubileus to be revived and cause mayhem for the world. "No! I cannot allow this to stand!" I shouted, my wings bursting from my back as I flew towards the statue, intent on destroying it and freeing Bayonetta.

I was shocked, however, when I saw Zeidan on Jubileus' forehead. "Don't think so, boy!" He said, launching off of Jubileus' head, slamming into me and the two of us tumbling through the air until we crashed down on the divider between the rocket's ignitions and the ship itself.

As Luka watched the events unfold before him, Jeanne suddenly appeared beside Luka on a motorcycle."Thank god. There's still time..." She said, recalling back to how she shielded herself and Damion with Bayonetta's ruby as Damion himself stepped up beside her.

"Sai... all I did was cause you pain and trouble throughout your journey and you saved my sister. I can never hope to repay you... But I'm damn sure gonna try." He said. He then grabbed and threw Jeanne's bike high into the air, allowing her to bounce off of several angels to reach the side of the rocket, which she stuck to with Witch powers.

"The Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! It is the pride of the Umbra Witches!" Jeanne said, driving up the rocket towards Jubileus.

Damion, meanwhile, leapt onto the divider alongside Zeidan and myself, knocking the corrupt demon away from me. "Damion..." I said in shock.

"You helped me more than I can say, Sai. Let me help you now." He said, helping me up.

"Alright, let's do this!" I said. The two of us rushed in at him, but as luck would have it, the part of the rocket we were on detached and exploded, sending the three of us flying onto a conveniently nearby asteroid that would work as a boss battle platform. But I looked back in shock at the rocket and Jubileus. "Bayonetta! No!" I shouted.

"She'll be fine. Jeanne's alive, too. She's on her way to save her now." Damion said, pointing, our enhanced Demon vision allowing us to see Jeanne rushing up the statue on the way to Jubileus.

I looked at this and smiled, before turning and smirking at Zeidan. "Well, Zeidan. It looks like your luck just ran out." I said.

He began chuckling, before outright bursting out with laughter. "Oh, no, Sai. This worked out better than I could've hoped. With Jubileus out of the way, truly nothing can stand against me now." He said, revealing two vials of blood. "Behold, blood from Jubileus and the Demon Lord himself, Mundus!" He declared.

"Mundus' blood... No way..." I said, shocked.

"The blood of the angel and demon gods together. I wonder what would happen?" He asked, downing both vials.

"No!" We shouted as we rushed forward, before were blasted back by the a burst of energy. When we opened our eyes again, we were shocked to see Zeidan, still in human form, but as tall and bulky as his demon form, his skin now looking like he had a galaxy swirling around inside him, his hair, now waist-length and floating around behind him like he was underwater, now changing all different colors.

 _ **"I have become THE ultimate life form. What are you going to do now, Nephew?"**_ Zeidan asked, his voice now sounding auto-tuned.

"The power of the demon and angel gods rolled up in one..." Damion said.

"This is bad. I can TASTE the power radiating off of him." I said.

[That level of power... It feels unreal...]

His lines are in bold, italics AND UNDERLINED! He is the most powerful being in existence!

"We only have one chance of winning. And that's working together." I told Damion.

"I've got your back. This guy took my sister and caused both of us unimaginable pain. I'll make sure he takes both of our pain back a thousand fold!" Damion said, readying his bow as I readied my motorcycle and drove at Zeidan.

 **Background Music: "Our Solemn Hour" by Within Temptation**

Damion fired a rapid-fire barrage of arrows from his bow at Zeidan as I zoomed towards him with my motorcycle. Zeidan managed to catch or deflect most of the arrows and swiped at me, but I leaned to the side and spun did three donuts with the bike, cutting Zeidan with both the bladed wings of the bike and the saw blade tires, while the tail also lashed out at him and the dragon's head also bit him or breathed fire and burned him, causing him to stagger back, before a charged arrow from Damion knocked him down.

 _ **"Insignificant pests! I am all powerful! You're nothing to me!"**_ Zeidan shouted, releasing a miniature galaxy from his body, holding it above his head like a Destructo-Disc, before flinging it at us. I slid under it while Damion jumped and rolled through the air, passing over it, but both of us where then clotheslined as Zeidan rushed forward with his arms out, slamming into both of us, flying high and flinging us back down onto the asteroid. _**"Now, taste the wrath of the one, true god!"**_ He shouted, raising his hands.

"He threw... a FUCKING galaxy at us." I said.

"Nevermind that. Worry about what he's throwing at us now." Damion said as a number of asteroids rained down on us, some almost the size of Pluto.

"Dammit... We can't let those get past us. They could destroy the Earth." I said. The two of us rushed at the rain of meteors, blasting or smashing through each of them. "Get that shit out of here!" I said, backhanding one of the Pluto-sized meteors away.

"I've caused this world a lot of problems. I won't let you destroy it!" Damion said, kicking away another near-planetoid meteor away. With all the meteors dealt with Zeidan then rushed in once again, flipping forward and hitting me with an axe kick, sending me down to the platform, before hitting Damion with a blast of angelic and demonic energy, blasting him down as well.

 _ **"The two of you could never hope to beat me! I'll destroy you, then everyone you've cared about!"**_ Zeidan said, rushing down.

"I won't let you!" I shouted, getting my bike again and spinning it around several times, slashing him again with the wheels and wings, the stabbing at him with the tail and the dragon head, which again took massive bites out of him, before slamming it down on him, sending him down to the ground, where Damion stood, waiting.

"You've already held my sister hostage. Now threatening her life? I will make you suffer!" Damion snapped, slicing away with his bow and shooting him with it several times, before switching to his Predator claws, slashing at him and stabbing him over and over, before impaling him on both claws and blasting him back with the plasma blasters.

We continued to beat down on him, but no matter how much damage we did to him, even with my godly motorcycle, he still stayed strong and we were starting to wear down. _**"You poor simple fools. I told you, I am a god! No matter how much you attack me, I'll keep on coming. But you... You're still mortals... And you will tire and die like any other mortal."**_ Zeidan taunted.

"Dammit... We can't keep this up much longer. We need to finish him NOW." Damion said.

"I've got one more trick that should do it, but I'll need time to do it. I need you to hold him back." I said, gathering up my demonic energy.

"Good. It lets me have my chance to make him regret ever even thinking of touching my sister." He shouted, rushing in. He dodged a few blasts of energy and slashing, stabbing and smacking away at him with his Dracotaclysm scythe, before switching to his Plague talons and clawing at him several times, leaving a number of gashes at energy seeped out of and into the talons, blasting him back with his own godly energy.

Zeidan then fired an overwhelming amount of energy bolts and small meteors at him, but Damion managed to masterfully block and slice through all of them at unreal speeds, before rushing in at Zeidan and hitting him with a cross slash across his chest. "This is for my sister!" He snapped, stabbing into Zeidan's left arm at the shoulder and slicing all the way down, so his arm was split in two. "This is for forcing me to fight Sai!" He shouted, speeding around Zeidan and giving him a million shallow, but painful cuts all cross his body, finishing with a massive slice across his chest. "This is for all the pain you've caused Bayonetta and Jeanne." He said, putting his swords away, his fists glowing with black flames and he pulverized Zeidan. "And this one is for EVER crossing me." He said, delivering a powerful headbutt that brought Zeidan to one knee. Zeidan was finally showing some signs of fatigue, but Damion was completely exhausted... and all the damage he'd done was beginning to heal. "Sai, now!" Damion said, jumping away.

"I summon you, oh great and powerful ruler of hell... Come to my side, Lady Ignis!" I said, slamming my fist into the ground, not too far away, a massive demonic portal opened and the upper body of a woman, the size of a sky scraper with giant bat-like wings, ram-like horns, long-flowing hair made of pure red fire that matched her piercing red eyes, highlighted especially by her jet black, reptilian-like skin. This was the god form of my grandmother and ruler of hell, Ignis.

She turned to me, her eyes turning ocean blue as she ran a massive finger through my hair and stroked it under my chin like someone would for a cat a few times. I smiled a bit and enjoyed the affection, before pointing at Zeidan. Her eyes immediately turned back to the piercing red as she slammed her fist down on him, doing so a thousand more times, crushing him more and more each time, before she finally released a beam of demonic energy from her mouth and eyes that reduced Zeidan to a charred skeleton, before wiping that away as well. She then smiled at me and blew me a kiss, before retreating back into the portal she'd come from.

 **End Music**

Damion's eyes were the size of dinner plates at this. "Holy shit. You've got some dangerous friends." He said.

"Yeah! Let's see Bayonetta do something like that!" I said triumphantly.

"Um..." Damion said, tapping my shoulder and pointing off into the distance.

My jaw dropped when I saw Bayonetta and Jeanne together, summoning a massive woman, even bigger than a planet, punch Jubileus hard enough to knock her soul out of her body and send it into the sun. "Oh, come on!" I snapped.

"Wait. Look!" Damion said, pointing. Jubileus' body was careening down towards the Earth at reentry speeds.

"No way! If that hits, it's gonna be like the dinosaurs all over again!" I said worriedly.

"We can't let that happen! Come on!" Damion said, the two of us rushing to the falling statue.

* * *

Bayonetta knelt solemnly on Jubileus as the now lifeless statue careened towards the planet, feeling completely defeated at this time, before a familiar foot stepped up beside her."Unbelievable. We managed to stop this abomination and it's still going to destroy the world!" Jeanne said, appearing beside Bayonetta.

"Jeanne!" Bayonetta said, shocked to see Jeanne survived once again.

"Don't forget about us." I said as Damion and I walked up.

"You thought we'd miss this?" Damion asked.

"Come now. You're one of a kind. If you die here, who is going to save the world? I'll send you home, even if it kills me... Now let's finish this." Jeanne said.

"You and I are going home together! Jeanne, we're both one of a kind!" Bayonetta told her.

"Now those are the eyes I've been waiting to see." Jeanne said with a smirk.

"Let's do this, ladies! And Damion..." I said as we all began smashing up the statue, breaking it piece by piece until there was finally nothing left and only the four of us were left careening towards the Earth.

The four of us recovered in mid-air and quickly worked towards finding each other. "Jeanne!" Bayonetta called, floating towards her.

"I'm OK!" Jeanne assured her, also floating to get to Bayonetta.

"We're here, too." I said as Damion and I floated up.

"Let's go! Just stay close to me!" Bayonetta instructed.

Damion then flew in and grabbed them both. "We're getting back to the planet, ladies. Just hang on tight." Damion said as the two descended back to the Earth.

* * *

Back on the planet, Luka looked up towards the sky in disbelief. "OK. This is getting ridiculous! How do you keep surviving all this!? I bet you're trying to sneak up on me right now... Aren't you, Bayonetta!?" Luka asked, looking around for any signs of Bayonetta, but finding none.

"My brother... And Sai..." Selene said worriedly.

* * *

We now approach the sad scene of a funeral, this time for Bayonetta and myself, with Rodin, Enzo, Damion and Selene in attendance. "Well, no rest for the wicked. But at least she's at peace- back in the box she came from. And Sai's gone to the hell he came from! I guess I'm gonna have to find a new racket to line my pockets. No bonus for Old Enzo this time. As fuckin' usual..." Enzo griped.

"Is money the only thin you think about?" Selene asked, clearly annoyed.

"You know how it works with witches, Enzo. They make a deal with the devil, and when they die, the devil gets his due. Ya get sucked down into hell, and wandering around scared shitless for eternity. As for demons, doesn't matter how good or bad you were. Your time runs out and hell takes back what belongs to it. Kinda comes with the territory." Rodin explained.

"Why you tellin' me this!? Is this not why we are standing here, praying for their souls to rest in peace!? I better not be out here catchin' a fucking cold if these prayers don't mean nothing!" Enzo snapped.

"They've both done so much. For all of us and the entire world. If there's one place they don't belong, it's Hell." Damion said.

"It's nice to think your prayers are worth a damn, isn't it? You made a killing exploiting them. Hell, you never know, they might get lonely and come back to haunt your ass!" Rodin teased.

"Haunt me!? Hell can keep 'em then!" Enzo said.

"Strange. It sounded like you'd miss them so much, I thought you'd leap at the chance to have them back." Damion teased.

Suddenly, two massive bushels of Rosemary made their way forward, making Damion and Selene back off slightly, before parting to reveal Luka carrying them."I said I'd never give up chasing you... I just never thought the chase would end like this." Luka said as he placed two large bushes of flowers on Bayonetta's coffin.

"Luka?! Why would you bring Rosemary of all fucking flowers?!" Selene demanded.

"She said it was a demon repellent. It might help you on the road ahead..." Luka said. before turning to my coffin. "Sorry, Sai. You gotta hate those Rosemary. Hope this makes up for it." He said, placing a single black rose on my coffin.

But suddenly, the angelic light appeared, signaling the angels coming for their prize. "Hey... Hey! Wait a second!? What the hell are they coming down here to get her for!?" Enzo asked.

"Of course they'd come for the prize they've been seeking all along." Jeanne said.

"Holy shit! You're..." Luka said.

Jeanne then leapt up and started beating the angels to a pulp, landing on a large gravestone and looking down at her attire. "This looks ridiculous on me! I swear, this is the last time I cosplay." Jeanne griped, referring to her nun costume.

"I think its a nice fit for you. Now save some of those oversized poultry for me." Damion said, jumping up and slicing them apart with his bow, before shooting down several more.

"You hear that!? That's your cue!" Rodin said to the caskets.

"Will you hurry up!? Don't tell me you fell asleep in that thing again!" Jeanne snapped.

"Hey! What the... You gotta fuckin' be kidding me... You tellin' me they're..." Enzo started, before Bayonetta burst out of the casket and assisted in the angelic ass-whooping, Enzo desperately dodging the bullets and crashes around him, even leaping into Rodin's arms, before diving out of them just as the casket lid fell down and crashed on Rodin's head, breaking in half while leaving the bartender unharmed. "Un-be-fucking-lievable!" Enzo said in disbelief.

"Morning!" Bayonetta said happily, before looking annoyed. "What's with shoving me into this filthy old casket!? And next time, some air holes would be nice. Fewer worms, ideally..." She complained.

"Save the chit-chat for later. We've got work to do." Jeanne snapped as the she, Bayonetta and Damion continued the slaughter of angels.

Luka watched as Bayonetta danced gracefully through the air, almost in slow motion as he took in her beauty, as well as the scent of her new perfume. "Extra Ingenue?" He asked.

"It has a bit of rosemary. In the language of flowers, rosemary equates to remembrance... Suits me now, doesn't it?" Bayonetta asked. She then looked down at my still covered, unmoving casket. "Sai, deary, you're trying my patience! Time for you to get out of that box and take care of your share of the angels!" She snapped.

Damion ceased fighting and approached my coffin, casually grabbing the lid and throwing it away behind him with a single hand, splattering an angel in the process. He then looked into the casket, discovering there was nothing inside it. "And where the hell do you think Sai is?" He asked.

Bayonetta looked down and was shocked to see I indeed was not in the casket. "What!? Where could that little bugger possibly be right now?!" She demanded.

"Maybe he skipped out because of all the Rosemary. Yuck!" Selene said, kicking away one of the flowers near her.

Bayonetta sighed at this. "Oh, well. I'll give the little demon a proper spanking the next time I see him. For now..." She said, turning back to the angels. "Let's dance, boys!" Bayonetta said.

* * *

Unbeknownst to Bayonetta and the others at the funeral, however, Balder had once again survived, even through the destruction of Jubileus, protected inside the god's eye, finally breaking out from the remains of the Creator's face from where it laid in a dead swamp, crawling a few feet away before finally standing back up. He then noticed the power surging through him. "Incredible... After all that happened, I still possess the power of the Creator! Now I will command this Earth and rule over all of creation!" He preached, laughing triumphantly.

It was because of this, however, that he didn't notice the open hand with a slightly tucked in thumb now aimed at him. "Hakai." The owner of the hand announced as a surge of destructive energy was released from it just in time for Balder to look over in shock and surprise, before screaming as his existence in this world was erased. The camera then turned to reveal me wearing a copy of Lord Beerus' outfit. "Before creation... Comes destruction." I said.

Who better to destroy the Creator than the Destroyer?!

[Well, a guy cosplaying as the Destroyer, anyway...]

"Hey, I'll have you know, both Whis and Lord Beerus think I'm a very good candidate for the next God of Destruction!" I countered.

[You couldn't handle being a god. You couldn't even make it to your own funeral.]

"Wait, that was today?! Oh, man! Bayonetta's gonna be SO pissed at me!" I said fearfully.


End file.
